5 Key Tips Connecting With Kids Therapeutically
- Feb 1, 2023
- 4 min read
Written by: Amanda Dounis, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
The most important relationship inside the therapy space is the therapeutic relationship. Understanding the Therapeutic Alliance is extremely important. Not just for kids but also for adults to understand. It's the connection between the therapist and the individual. If we want to help kids, we need to connect with them. Building rapport sets the foundations for self-empowerment. This then leads to successful sessions with achievable outcomes.
Tip 1: The first session
Quite often we want to dive into techniques and explore solutions. This describes the enthusiastic therapist who is equipped and compassionate. We need to accept that first, we must value the importance of rapport. In my experience, the building of a trusting therapeutic relationship clears the pathway to achieve goals and outcomes. The first session is very important. A therapeutic relationship is developed. It may vary in style. Sometimes it can be perceived as mentoring or coaching. Some individuals think that life coaching is just for adults. But did you know about Life Coaching for Kids?
Tip 2: The next session
It is anticipated that the young client is looking forward to this session as they have already met you and built rapport from the first session. Having already had a session means they have an impression, and hopefully a shift in the direction they are travelling. This shift is supported by a feeling they have from the rapport gained. Every small shift /change matters. A healthy rapport is like a catalyst for outcomes.
Tip 3: The purpose of feedback
I find some therapists are a little afraid of feedback in case it is negative. I believe all feedback is useful. Feedback helps the individual make an honest assessment of how they feel the session went. I collect feedback at the end of the first session and the beginning and end of each session thereafter. This helps the therapeutic relationship stay healthy and respectful. It's what we do with feedback that leads to great sessions. A good therapist sees the value in feedback. Feedback should be accepted without judgement. A short and purposeful discussion around planning should always form part of the discussion after feedback is sought.
Tip 4: The purpose of setting goals
Some clients may not have goals or a particular direction that they wish to travel. They may come in with problems and areas of concern yet have no goals moving forward. It is our job to strategically invite the possibilities of achieving outcomes (also known as goals). We need to see how the client feels about goals. This is important. Young persons may feel pressure to achieve if we outline goals. We don't want this added pressure. So it is important through rapport building, that their idea of goals is explored. Reframing can be useful here. Small achievable goals can become fun and motivate. I believe that a good therapist can ensure there are some goals, no matter their size, and include them in the treatment plan. The best consultant here becomes the young client. Yes, that's right, the young client should be part of the planning process. I check on goals at each session. Goals should not just be set at the beginning. Goals change, and goals should change as progress takes place, or as new challenges arise. So I believe in consulting with the client as to what the goals are for each session. Even if I must offer lots of input here, I still will include the young client as part of the process.
Tip 5: The purpose of tasking
Change doesn't happen inside my clinic or my zoom room. Change happens when the client leaves and goes back into their challenging environment confronted with their concerns /problems. So to help with this process I often suggest some tasking. I am well aware that some individuals may be resistant to tasking, so I tread carefully. I do not want anything to ruin the therapeutic relationship. I let all clients know that I will not be disappointed if they do not do the tasks. Most of the time we come up with and agree on the tasks together. And there are times I may suggest tasks. Tasks usually consist of practising a skill or technique. Some tasks are record keeping, journaling, and creating. And some tasks are doing some uncomfortable things or simply one thing different. Whatever the task and whether it was done or not, this is then used as feedback.
I hope this short read has given you an insight into the therapeutic relationship.
Amanda Dounis, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Amanda Dounis, is a leader in kids, tweens and teens coping skills. A professional award-winning leader in the early childhood industry, Amanda has added wonderful tools to her therapy practice. Amanda says it's difficult for these kids working through these challenging years. So she enthusiastically joins their ride to show them to smooth over bumpy roads and keep moving forward. In the end, it's the challenges that give them the opportunity to practice their coping skills. She certainly promotes self-empowerment through courage and curiosity.
