Written by: Jennifer Dougherty, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Take a moment to think back on some of the most challenging decisions you have made, and they can be any area of your life. Got them? Good! Next step, think about the process/strategy you used to make those decisions. Did you use a similar process for each decision? Did you ask for advice or input? Or was there no process/strategy at all? So, at this point, you might ask yourself, “Why are you asking such questions?”As a leader or manager, decisions are often challenging and come with great responsibility and cost. “With great power comes great responsibility” – Uncle Ben, Spiderman (and yes, I went there). Leaders’ decisions impact employees, stakeholders, business outcomes, and organizations. Given these factors and others, exploring our decision-making process/strategy from time to time can yield a plethora of information about ourselves as leaders and people and how we show up in the world. Now think about when you had to decide; what was your first response? What emotions came up? Was your fight, flight, or freeze response lit up? I was curious to know what other coaches were encountering with decision-making when partnering with their leadership and management clients on the topic, so I asked a group of trusted coaches with decades of experience. They, like other experts, found some common themes when it comes to decision-making. Deciding Emotions such as fear, self-doubt, confidence, vulnerability, and compassion may bubble up at the start of needing to make a decision. When exploring those first emotions, another level may exist, such as fear of making the wrong decision, an unpopular decision, failure, or success. Other fears may be loss of control or just deciding in general (decision fatigue, decision lock, or analysis paralyze). Then there is the fear tied to the outcomes of the decision, taking responsibility for the decision, and the fear of change that may crop up as well. For others, self-doubt, confidence, and vulnerability can lead to second-guessing oneself, not having enough or too much confidence in a decision, comparing oneself to others, or worrying about other people’s perceptions. In addition, compassion and empathy could affect the decision-making process. With these aspects coming up before even deciding and awareness of the impact these thoughts and emotions can have on the decision-making process, where does one start? Aspects to include in decision-making Acknowledge and validate the thoughts and feelings occurring. Being self-aware, utilizing emotional intelligence, communicating, and collaborating can aid in decreasing blind spots and biases to play a more prominent role in decision-making than needed. Then identify the problem and the decision to be made. At times the outcomes, cost, and impact of a decision may not be as expected because the problem(s) and the decision(s) to take have not been appropriately identified. It is essential to recognize that the process you usually undertake may not be the most effective or efficient for every situation—context matters. Since context matters, collect and review relevant information and data from various perspectives. Next, envision the outcome(s) and impact(s) you would like to have via the decision. Then play the “What if” game (a favorite of mine) and devil’s advocate to generate viable alternatives, options, and pivots points, examine what failure and success look like, and explore worst-case scenarios. Afterward, weigh the alternatives and options. This is an aspect of the process that you do not rush – feeling comfortable and confident is essential. Various tools help with this, from decision maps/matrices to good old fashion pro and con lists or an impartial third party to function as a sounding board (e.g., a leadership coach – wink, wink). Once you have decided, gain feedback from those who will be impacted and implement the decision. What may seem practical and doable may not be when you start learning about the behind-the-scenes nature of the decision. After gaining feedback on a decision, re-evaluate it before implementing it. Then reflect on the decision. Reflect not only on the decision but also on the process you used to make the decision, the outcomes and impact the decision had, and how you identified the problem and the decision to be made. Take a moment and reflect on the process, outcome(s), and impact(s) of the decision(s) that came to you at the start of this article. What did you learn about yourself? How will you evolve your process, or will you? Was there fallout or collateral damage? How can you aid in the implementation and ease the decision’s impact? Other considerations There are other considerations to keep in mind when making a decision. Depending on the decision, not deciding is a choice. If this is the case, be aware that this might frustrate others. By being transparent and communicating openly about your process, you may not gain their agreement, but you might gain their trust and respect. Additionally, balance decisions with not only logical reasoning, evidence, and data but with intuition and emotions (e.g., compassion and empathy). Finally, values, morals, ethics, and boundaries are aspects of self that will also guide decision-making. So, allow these aspects to help guide you. Concluding thoughts Decision-making, in general, is challenging. Is it just me, or is even deciding what is for dinner a struggle some days? All right, moving on. All joking aside, decisions can be even more challenging for leaders and managers. The exact process you use to make one decision may not work for the next, and several decisions are usually complex and complicated. So, suppose you need and want support in your decision-making process. In that case, I welcome you to reach out to me via LinkedIn or my website about the possibilities of partnering to see how I can be that impartial sounding board and help you think differently about your process. Follow me on LinkedIn and visit my website for more info! Read more from Jennifer! Jennifer Dougherty, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Dr. Jennifer E. Dougherty is a ICF and iPEC certified leadership coach, organizational consultant, and trainer and facilitator. She is passionate about helping leaders at multiple levels and organizations be the best versions of themselves. Dr. Dougherty has been helping organizations and leaders who needed assistance changing their organization’s culture, providing work-life harmony for themselves and their employees, increasing teamwork, engagement, collaboration, and voicing. While at the same time decreasing turnover, organizational silence, burnout, and absenteeism. She is the founder and lead coach of Dougherty Coaching and Consulting and believes that the primary purpose of life is to learn and develop. References: De Smet, A., Jost, G., & Weiss, L. (2019). Three keys to faster, better decisions. The McKinsey Quarterly. Campbell, A., Whitehead, J., & Finkelstein, S. (2009). Why good leaders make bad decisions. Harvard business review, 87(2), 60-6. Confer, M. (2019). 4 key components of effective decision making for leaders. ATD Blog. Landry, L. (2020). Why managers should involve their team in the decision-making process. Harvard Business School - HBS Online - Business Insights. Onley, D. (2019). How leaders can make better decisions: Choose a process and style that fits the situation. SHRM - HR Magazine, Fall 2019. Perry, E. (2022). Improve your management skills with a better decision-making process. BetterUp Blog. Snowden, D. J., & Boone, M. E. (2007). A leader's framework for decision making. Harvard business review, 85(11), 68. Tsipursky, G. (2020). 8-step leadership decision-making process for make the best decisions. LinkedIn Blog.

Written by: Shona Hirons, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. The 18th of October is World Menopause Day and this is a topic very close to my heart. The impact menopause had on my career. When I was age 44, I went into early menopause when I had a hysterectomy as a result of being diagnosed with uterine cancer. Two and a half years earlier, I had a very serious accident and immediately my periods stopped completely. I did ask my GP about this and he thought the extreme stress and trauma had caused my periods to stop. Menopause was ruled out, because he said I was too young. I was not offered any tests to establish this at the time. When I returned to work after my accident, I actually thought I had dementia at times. I would be half way through a conversation with a client and completely forget what I was talking about. I had to keep asking people to repeat what they told me only a few minutes earlier. Several times, I forgot my way to work and had to pull over to get my bearings. On one occasion, I forgot my address when I was picking up a prescription from the pharmacy. After two years of my periods stopping, they started again with a vengeance. This time, they were like nothing I had experienced before. I daren’t wear white, for fear of flooding. I felt dirty and was taking several showers a day. I was permanently hot and had sweat patches under my arms. I started being late for meetings, because I’d have to rush outside to wait out a hot flush. My sleep was affected, because I was always so hot during the night, and this made me sluggish and irritable during the day. I felt really stupid and my female Line Manager would keep asking me “When are we going to get the old Shona back? ” I didn’t have the answers, so she put me on a Performance Improvement Plan and it became clear that nothing I did was going to be good enough. I left when I was told I was too much of a risk for the business and had no option to leave, or be forced out. When I discovered that my symptoms were menopause related I dedicated most of my time to researching this area. I discovered that so many women dread menopause and there is still so much stigma and discrimination around it, especially in the workplace. Did you know the average age for a female CEO in the UK is age 55, whereas the average age for menopause is 51? It seems that just when a woman feels ready to step up the ladder, her body betrays her. It doesn’t have to be like this. It is possible to have a joyful menopause. However, this takes understanding and support. There are many things that women can do to make their symptoms bearable, but with women over the age of 50 being the fastest growing segment of the workforce, action needs to be taken now. All Managers should receive training to ensure that anyone experiencing menopause symptoms get the same support and understanding as if they had any other health issue. Advice for Managers The chances are you either employ or manage at least one woman. However, how confident do you think a member of your team would feel about talking to you about the menopause? Unfortunately, a staggering 90% of women say their workplaces offer no help or support to those going through menopause. Symptoms can typically last for four years, and this lack of support and understanding can lead to performance issues, poor mental health and too many women are quitting their careers as a result. https://www.wrighthassall.co.uk/knowledge-base/ensuring-menopausal-women-are-supported-in-the-workplace Many women with menopause symptoms suffer in silence at work, but no woman should ever have to press pause on her career due to menopause. I know I did. I felt so unsupported when I was going through this natural transition in my life. If I didn’t leave, I would have been put through a disciplinary hearing, which made me feel even more stressed and incompetent. I have spoken to many other women who did the same. Often, it takes just a few simple changes to the working environment to make a difference. Even just making the conversation about making menopause normal can reduce the impact of some symptoms and enable women to continue performing well in their roles. 6 Things that every Employer needs to know about menopause 1. What is menopause? Menopause is a natural transition in a woman’s life, where estrogen levels decline and she stops having periods. Symptoms can last for several years and can vary for each woman. https://www.bodyform.co.uk/discover/pre-menopause/what-is-menopause/?gclid=CjwKCAjw-rOaBhA9EiwAUkLV4iOVxUGwBmOPMCOljCo5D4c7-hFbwEF6ewu1pJurk0vnHc8ReoSRaRoCoioQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds 2. When does menopause happen? The menopause typically happens between ages 45 and 55, with the average age being 51. The ‘perimenopause’ is the phase leading up to the menopause, when a woman’s hormone balance starts to change. This can happen as early as their 20s, or as late as their 40s. 3. What are the symptoms? There are a wide range of symptoms, which can vary from woman to woman. Symptoms can fluctuate and be felt at varying degrees. Any of the symptoms can be a challenge for women as they go about their daily lives, including at work. Use my menopause questionnaire to track your symptoms. 4. What are some of the symptoms? Some of the most typical symptoms include: Psychological issues, such as anxiety and/or depression and mood swings. Brain fog, panic attacks, loss of confidence and reduced concentration. Hot flushes Sleep disturbance that leads to exhaustion and irritability Night sweats Irregular periods and/or periods can become heavier or lighter Muscle and joint stiffness, aches and pains Recurrent urinary tract infections Headaches/migraines Weight gain, particularly around the middle Skin changes – dryness, acne and itchiness Reduced libido 5. What is the Managers role? It is essential to provide support and have an understanding of how menopause can affect women. Effective management of team members with menopausal symptoms that are impacting on their work will help them to improve the team’s morale, retain valuable skills and talent, plus reduce sickness absence. The first point of contact should be with their Line Manager or dedicated Menopause First Aider. Line Managers are responsible for implementing the people management policies and procedures that can help someone experiencing menopause symptoms to feel supported and to be effective in their role. Line Managers need to build a level of trust, so that employees affected by the menopause feel able to discuss it with them, without judgement or implications. They should support reasonable adjustments they need to work. If someone tells you about their menopausal symptoms, it should be treated as confidential. Line Managers should ask open questions, such as “How are you doing at the moment?”, or “I’ve noticed you’ve been arriving late recently, and I wondered if you are OK?” It’s up to the individual to disclose any particular symptoms they may be experiencing. There should be regular 121s for an opportunity to start the conversation, which should always be in private and the employee feels at ease. Currently, recent research by Unleash shows that 7% of women talk to their employer about menopause. https://www.unleash.ai/wellbeing/how-can-employers-do-better-around-menopause/ Here are a few tips that may assist further: Avoid interruptions – switch off your phone and talk in private Ask simple, open, non-judgemental questions Approach conversations with empathy, but don’t be embarrassed Maintain good eye contact Listen actively and carefully Encourage the employee to talk Show empathy and understanding Focus on the person, not the problem Avoid making assumptions or being prescriptive 6. Risk Assessments As many women in the perimenopause stage will suffer with hot sweats, consider whether the temperature and ventilation in the workplace is suitable. In addition, be flexible when it comes to the materials used in any uniform or corporate clothing. In warmer months, women should wear cotton or linen fabrics, which allow the skin to breathe. Whereas synthetic materials, such as polyester, acrylic and nylon tend to exaggerate sweating. Clothes that are too tight can make women feel hot and unbearable. Wide leg trousers and floaty dresses are much more comfortable. In the cooler months, women should opt for thinner layers, such as teaming a blouse with a cardigan, rather than a bulky woollen jumper. Ensure that women have access to toilet facilities and cold water. Be discreet and do not time these breaks. In the UK employers have a legal duty under The Equality Act 2010 for the health and safety of their employees. Menopause can give rise to a Section 6 Equality Act disability claim providing the symptoms have a long-term and substantial adverse effect on normal day-to day activities. The specific needs of menopausal women should be considered, so employers should ensure the working environment will not make their symptoms worse. How do I feel now? Now that I understand menopause in more detail and I’m talking about it, I’m definitely having a joyful menopause. I take HRT, which reversed my symptoms within days. I have adjusted my diet to include more wholegrains and protein, but I have not been on a diet. I have swapped out my cardio workouts for strength and HIIT training. This has improved my tone and protected my muscles and bones. I take daily doses of Vitamin D and a liquid collagen shot to replace the lost collagen that happens when you hit menopause. I have become a role model for other women by making it a positive change in their lives, rather than something to dread and ‘put up with’. If HRT isn’t for you, there are many alternatives, so do your research, or feel free to reach out to me for support. I’m loving life and still rocking it. At 48 years old I now feel younger and fitter than I did 10 years ago. Follow me on Facebook , LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Shona! Shona Hirons, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Shona Hirons is an award-winning global Resilience and Burnout Coach. A breakdown from work-related stress, which led to a life-changing accident, requiring major facial reconstructive surgery and brain damage, gave her a big wake-up call. During her recovery, she went on a journey of self-discovery to rebuild her resilience, consider her values and achieve all the things she was told she couldn't do. Shona has developed strategies to boost her resilience, and now helps others to do the same. She is the CEO of Mindset in Motion, and a leader in corporate wellbeing, working with corporate clients in over 195 countries. Her mission: To improve the well-being of people and businesses throughout the world.

Written by: Alicia Rios Wilks , Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. An enlightened understanding of how the current approach to treating substance abuse is actually abusive and how the global ignorance regarding addiction is killing our culture. What we've been told and taught, and the way we’ve thought about addiction is gravely wrong. And it has led society into a mindset that is unintentionally but unquestionably abusive towards those we label as "abusers", aka "addicts". The very foundations we based our current teachings and treatment on are so severely incorrect that we are unknowingly barring people from the very thing we tell them we are encouraging ‒ "recovery". We assist in holding them captive to addiction. And then we punish them for "relapsing", when they were never truly free. "We have been sentencing innocent people to a lifetime of struggle, suffering, judgement and abuse. And it's time it ends." The very notion that some people are clinically and definitively addicts and others aren't is a bold attempt to skirt the truth. Addictions go far beyond substance abuse. If there is any experience, substance, or aid that you believe you need in order to get to feel the way you want to feel, then you are also living with an addiction. We all have places where addiction has shown up in our lives. It's just that some are able to turn a blind eye because it's not something typically labelled an addiction or extreme enough to be on obvious display. We’ve written addiction off as a chronic mental disease ‒ something “gone wrong”. Something disastrously complex to be both scared and ashamed of. And we’ve labelled addicts as people who are weak, broken or undisciplined enough to fall victim to it. And then we call them “abusers”. But that’s one big tangle of misunderstanding. Addiction and substance abuse are not the same thing. An addiction can lead to the abuse of a substance because we build tolerance and need more and more to achieve the same result, but they are two different structures. And in neither case is the person weak, broken or undisciplined. On the contrary, the most self-controlled and “strong-willed” people can sway more into addiction precisely because of that obsessive focus. " We must learn to separate the addiction structure from the individual that’s trapped within it. It is not a personal trait." I offer a new understanding of addiction. In the work I do, I don’t label addiction as a disorder, illness, weakness, nor a series of poor choices. It is simply a belief structure that traps people in a cycle of behaviour that is only possible to break once that structure is dismantled and transformed. All human behaviour is driven by emotional states of being. Without exception. We do things because of the way we believe it will allow us to feel. We have an addiction to something ‒ which can be a substance, or equally a behaviour ‒ when we believe that we need that thing in order to feel a way in which we want to feel, or to avoid feeling a way we don't want to feel. In other words, we believe that thing is a prerequisite to us experiencing a desired change in our state of being. In that structure our belief is that we can't just choose to feel it for ourselves. All the power is in that "thing". This belief system holds people captive to the substance or behaviour, because without it, they are unable to have the emotional shift they desire. " And when you understand that this is the real structure; you understand that everyone has addictions." We see it everywhere. People are addicted to praise, to approval, to validation through social media, to shopping and even to food. Addicted to feeling needed, addicted to control, addicted to certain people, addicted to peak experiences, and I could easily go on. If you've ever said to yourself "I need to do XXX or else I won't feel XXX", that's dependency in the form of addiction. Perhaps it's "I need to workout or I don't feel right"... or "I only feel confident when I'm wearing makeup"... or "I need to see my therapist every week to feel better". Have you ever thought "I couldn't live without this person", or "I'm always happier when I'm in a relationship"? Well, that's the structure of addiction. It’s a limitation because you’re dependent on something to live the way you want to live, which takes away from your freedom. However, it’s not always harmful and it’s not always abuse. It becomes harmful once it’s preventing you from living the life you want to live. For one person it may be "I don’t feel like myself unless I meditate, or do yoga in the morning". For others, it's "I can't escape the feeling that I'm worthless unless I have a drink", or "I feel completely disconnected, hopeless and lost, until I get high". Same structure, different variations. We’ve all dipped into addiction for differing reasons. For some people, they simply can't numb the excruciating pain without "using". When you realise this, then you realise that asking ‒ nay, forcing ‒ people to just "give up" the drug/drink/behaviour (whatever they are addicted to) is trying to force them into a life without a valued emotional state, or without relief from the emotional pain. Whether that be by recommending they go "cold-turkey", or go to rehab or even join the 12-step program. " We’re not treating the cause, but we’re telling them to “overcome” the symptoms." What we're doing is on par with refusing morphine to an injured soldier and then telling them their suffering is their fault. It's abuse. Emotional pain can be just as extreme as physical injury. But we expect them to just "push through it". We tell them this is what they get for their "bad choices" in life. And on top of that, we judge them when they "slip up". " How long would you last withholding your only source of pain relief, or sole access to pleasure in life?" It's our lack of understanding of the structure of addiction that is keeping people addicted. Not only do we add to their suffering by imparting judgement and blame, and therefore shame, but everything we tell them holds them away from the real cure. We are the ones perpetuating the addiction cycle. Even the term "substance abuse " implies they're doing something "wrong". We label these people as if they’re a perpetrator, with connotations of evil motives. We're judging and punishing them in every way conceivable. And what happens when you torture an animal in a cage? They will double down on their efforts to escape . For most people, the addiction began as a means of escape, so this punishment only leads them back to their addiction. We must stop allowing this harmful ignorance. It's time we stand up for addicts and provide a real way out ‒ one that opens the cage so there's no need to escape. One that leads the way into Radical Freedom. If you or anyone you know is struggling with addiction, there is a way to permanently break the cycle. Find out more here! Follow me on Facebook , I nstagram , LinkedIn , and Youtube , or visit my website for more information on how you can escape unwanted patterns to live in Radical Freedom. Read more from Alicia! Alicia Rios Wilks, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Alicia Rios Wilks is a multi-award-winning thought leader on a mission to spark a Radical Freedom Movement. She is an innovator in combining human consciousness, mind and body transformation, and breakthrough performance. Like many of her clients, Alicia had spent much of her life feeling powerless, unsatisfied, and limited. To create her own transformation, Alicia brought together top research on the nature of consciousness and the structure of reality and pioneered a revolutionary method designed for the most powerful and rapid transformation humanly possible. She has since dedicated her life to helping others harness their innate power to release emotional blocks, live as the fullest expression of their true self, and intentionally create their dream life. She is the founder and creator of Radical Freedom, creating heart-centered spaces for others to learn how to live an unlimited life, connect to their unique superconscious genius and live their true nature and purpose.

Written by: Dr Wayne C A Wright, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Are you aware of how procrastination can kill your leadership credentials? We all do it, and it is the silent killer of our leadership potential. Do you: Put off doing critical tasks regularly Ignore facing letters you know are from suppliers or the bank that you owe money to Hope that the bank balance will improve to put off making that key decision to save the company Put off firing that key employee who is disruptive to the business We have all been there. Procrastination is the silent killer that undermines our leadership credential to our staff and the world around us. What causes us mentally to procrastinate: We struggle to get motivated until the activity and task become urgent and a deadline is close. We are overwhelmed with thoughts of doing the task at all Sometimes we convince ourselves that we are not capable of doing the task Invariably we get paralysed by not knowing how to start the task or activity or even what to say if it is a confrontation element with an employee This is a big one for me. The activity is tedious and boring. I want to jump on the task that I love doing. Or we fear failure, as the task is too great and overwhelming My top 6 tips to beat procrastination: Schedule a time to do the 'difficult' task with someone else. For example, month end is a process I hate, so sitting down with Alison who does my accounts, forces me to do all the admin and expenses that I dread If FEAR is driving your activities, talk this through with someone else to understand the risks of NOT doing it. This is where having good advisors around you will help you to see the wood for the trees as well as helping you to be accountable in making the right decision Always evaluate the risks of NOT doing a key task or activity. As a director it is imperative that we always evaluate the risks and create solutions to mitigate those risks. Again doing this with your team will share the burden and arrive at a consensus for getting things done Calculate the financial losses of ignoring an activity or task. Sometimes you need to scare yourself into action when you evaluate the impact of NOT doing something. Evaluate the reputation damage that you and the company would receive by NOT making the right decision. If politicians did this, then the world would be a better place!! Making ethical decision is hard, but essential if you do not want to be in the front pages of the main newspaper or social media post. Break down the difficult task into smaller tasks. As they say, 'how to eat an elephant...'. So breaking the task down into smaller manageable bite sizes makes the activity bearable and doable. You see FEAR invariably fuels the power of procrastination. Once we deal with that fear initially then it gives us the strength to deal with the task. So rise up and do it TODAY. You will thank me for it!! Contact us if this is what you see this characteristic in your leadership style, and we can work through ways to tackle this 'silent killer' once and for all. Click here for more information. Follow me on LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Dr. Wayne! Dr Wayne C A Wright, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Dr Wayne Wright has worked in some of the most celebrated corporate entities as well as fast growing medium sized businesses at senior and board levels. His experience is in the building of businesses from the bottom up with a clear understanding of the strategic elements essential in driving successful growth. With a scientist background he is named on 9 patents. Wayne has investments in healthcare businesses in the UK and US and for the last 20 years has led [W]sq solutions, a small boutique entrepreneur coaching organisation that works with fast growing businesses in accelerating growth and profitability.

Written by: Eszter Zsiray, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. If you have seen any working mothers, they all have one thing in common – they all are very busy as they juggle all the responsibilities on their shoulders: tasks, deadlines, projects at work and kind of the same at home, household chores, doctor’s appointments, project managing the family life and on top of it, trying to spend some quality time with the kids and hubby. It is not a surprise for anyone if most of the working mums feel burnout symptoms from time to time, they are overwhelmed, stressed out, and feeling fatigued due to the endless caregiving demands. I remember a couple of occasions from the past years when I heard my son crying for me and I could just scream due to the frustration and exhaustion in the middle of the night, and I was just unable to respond to my son’s need at that very moment. Apart from kicking daddy out of bed occasionally to pick up the crying kid at night, what else can we do to avoid or stop burnout? 1. Invisible labour One of the main reasons for working mothers to feel burnout symptoms at one point during motherhood is very simple, they literally have too much on their plate. Some of these tasks are part of the invisible labour that often goes unseen and unrecognised by others but still often falls into the mothers’ responsibilities to complete. Examples of invisible labour might be organising appointments and schedules, grocery shopping, cooking, loading the dishwasher or the washing machine – all might take just 5-30 minutes, but all together, those might keep mums busy for the whole afternoons, not giving them any space for quality family time or any me-time to recharge the batteries. Coaching tip: The first step is to recognise all these typical tasks that may need just a quick dedication of time or may take longer and be conscious about how many small tasks your family needs to operate in an ideal way. When you have a more realistic picture of the workload, you can see what you could do about it. 2. Fair distribution of tasks One possible option is to sit down with the family and see how you could distribute the tasks in a fair way that serves all members of the family. It is recommended to assign owners for the different tasks so that they are responsible under all circumstances for that task. If mummy cooks, then daddy can be cleaning up the kitchen and kids can lay the table for example. The father can be responsible for hoovering twice a week and for mopping while the mother can be responsible to load the washing machine. Coaching tip: Don’t be afraid to involve all family members. Kids could also get some easy tasks like setting or cleaning up the table, loading the dishwasher or picking up the toys from the floor. I know that it seems to be easier to just do it quickly, but that is not leading to any improvement in the long term. 3. Assertive communication While it sounds obvious, the execution is typically not that easy. There are two areas that you can pay attention to have a real change in your household. The first one is about communication. It is not the same effect if you burst out desperately at your kids and hubby about how they don’t help enough and you feel like the maid at your own home, or if you calmly sit down with them and you assertively explain to them how exhausted you are and how you need them to take ownership. Coaching tip: the key to assertive communication is to explain how you feel and how the current situation impacts you emotionally and physically instead of assuming that they should all be aware of it, and involve your family members in the conversation. Ask what are their thoughts about the current set-up, how they see it and what are they ready to change, where would they be happy to take more ownership. Instead of telling them what they should do, try to make them actively participate in the planning and see what they can take over and have family agreements in place instead of expectations. 4. Expectations We just arrived at the second factor you could pay attention to, and that is expectations. One side of the coin is to not have any expectations and assumptions on what your family should change without having those agreements and interactive conversations in place, but the other side is about your own expectations. We, working mothers are hard-working and often somewhat perfectionists, we like to control every little detail as we feel that it is just needed to keep everything together. But with such a high level of control you won’t be able to hand over tasks to your family members, so it is worth reflecting on the fact that there might be other ways of completing a task, maybe a very different one from your idea, maybe it is not as perfect, but the world won’t fall apart, and you will have the reward, you will have less workload on you. Coaching tip: as we are talking about high expectations towards your family members and how certain tasks should be completed, maybe you can take the time to reflect on your own perfectionism as well. What happens if from time to time you lower the standards a little bit? How do you feel about that? What are the areas of your task lists where you could let go of some items or maybe outsource them, and arrange more help? I am a big fan of outsourcing or automating all the household chores we just can: get help with having a cleaning lady coming over bi-weekly or do your grocery shopping online whenever you can. 5. Fun Finally, this all is not just about having a more balanced workload distribution in place and teaching your kids how to be responsible and showing them a great example that they can benefit from when growing up and starting their own family. You also had done all these changes to create some space for yourself that you can use to avoid burnout. By implementing a routine that supports you daily to have fun, rest or do something inspiring, you have done a lot to get off the treadmill and get closer to a lifestyle that is worth living. Coaching tip: what are the things you never have enough time for, and you always comment on them resignedly? Is it to prepare to run finally a marathon or maybe to join a painting class? Do you want to be a yoga instructor, write a book or maybe get your old bike out of the garage? Whatever it is, we are not here to accomplish endless task lists, that is not what takes it to be a good mother or give a purpose for life. It is the zest that you experience every day that will make you a patient and smiley mother and wife. Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Eszter! Eszter Zsiray, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Eszter Zsiray is a Certified Life Coach, author, blogger, and creator of the program VELL©, supporting her clients on three continents to successfully transform their lives. With 17+ years of leadership experience, she is passionate about human potential and growth. Her research areas are ownership & responsibility, self-sabotaging behaviors, the positive impact of confidence and empowerment, a growth mindset, and healthy habits for mental and physical well-being. As a mother herself, she is committed to serving women and mums, and she created a special program for new mothers to adjust to new life challenges and a program for women entrepreneurs to shift into the proper mindset and to thrive in their professional and personal lives.

Written by: Marcos R. Dreher, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. An existential question that follows all of us during our careers is not about how much money we make or the titles we collect. When you juxtapose your career achievements versus the achievements of the people you led during your career, you will place into perspective the true measure of your business life. Looking back on my 25+ years of experience, I have had fantastic leaders. Leaders that made me what I am. I have been forged in ice and fire by some of the most successful CEOs and leaders I had the grace to work with. Yet, let us not fool ourselves, I also have had extremely poor ones, leaders that were the sole decision for why I left the organization I belonged to – the maxim people leave their managers, not their companies, is extremely accurate in my case. And in both instances, I learned a lot! When I myself juxtapose these past experiences, the keyword that comes into mind is humility. For the sake of discussion, the type of humility I am talking is not the one taken by measures of self-deprecating behaviors or attitudes but by the esteem with which you regard others. These people I regard as natural-born good people who would never lie or steal from someone because of the respect and admiration they would have for that person. When you progress in your career, you should not ever forget that learning opportunities will come from different sources and backgrounds, and if you somehow buy in the concept that you can only learn from “smart” people or people that you regard “smarter” than you, your possibilities will be extremely limited. It is paramount that you understand that you never, ever (especially in today’s world) are alone in building your success. It does not matter whether you are starting your career and burning the midnight oil at the office, “alone.” Mind you: you are not alone! From the maintenance people that care that you have electricity running at your office to the doorman ensuring your safety, you have around you a vast selection of people which are “unknown” to the corporate ladder you are so avid to climb, people you might not even have noticed, but they are there to help with what they can offer. There is a quote I once read about JFK why touring NASA or JPL, and all of a sudden, he crosses paths with a janitor with a broom in his hand and JFK asks him what he is doing. “I am helping put a man on the moon,” the Janitor answered. The striking thing here is not only the humility of a president to talk to a janitor, but that the janitor felt that his contribution was heard and what he could offer to this to the immense mission, no matter how small a contribution, was a contribution indeed. This exemplifies the word purpose. Standing on the shoulders of giants means that you are standing on the shoulders of people with a purpose, with a sense of community, with a sense of help. These are the giants that bring you to where you are today. One of the first things I always tend to look at ‒ whenever the opportunity presents itself, is how the CEO of the company greets the receptionist. This very simple gesture, of perhaps just greeting “good morning Mrs. Jones” or something in the like, speaks volumes about the character of the person leading your company. And will definitely, define the yardstick you will use to measure your business life within that company. The hardest question you should ask yourself is: “Why should anyone be led by you?” In your career, you won’t be able to get anything done without an army of collaborators backing you up. You need giants who will pave the road ahead and offer you their shoulders for you to stand on. They will do this, not out of fear, but out of admiration for your style, because if you are a good leader, you’ll have captured their hearts. And you might be telling yourself, “Well I am already acting like this!” which is a great assessment, and surely this will help you along your leadership road. Yet, the great majority of us, still struggle with a core element of leadership skills: people management and with that a clear strategy on how to grow and harvest the leadership seeds you have planted when deciding upon hiring your talents. If they grow, you grow, if they shine, you shine. Leadership and talents have a symbiotic nature, mutually helping each other along their individual journeys without being taken advantage of or exploited by each other. To stand on the should of giants, you will need to first nurture the people around you to become giants themselves. Creating giants requires a good assessment of the future of the company you are leading and the type of talent it will need to bring it across the finishing line. The thrive for transformation and the ownership your team and your leadership style imbues in the corporate culture and the overall structure will be of quintessential nature to achieve this. This is the definite measure of success and the sole most important ingredient in defining how tall these giants will be. Yes, humility and will, will take you there for sure, but along the process, it helps if you develop an understanding of what it means to be human. By now, you know I am a psychologist operating in the business world, and such a combination is nuclear on developing talents, aligning objectives and simply getting the job done. Anything you do, anywhere you are, you will invariably have to deal with people, and developing an understanding on how they function, their needs and goals, will provide you the tools to create the tallest giants you ever encountered. I mentioned earlier in the article that people management skill is a dying art. A lot of CEOs are very financially driven and want people with very mathematical minds because the world in their minds is made of 1s and 0s – ok, perhaps not so radical. Yet, I tend to lean towards the talents who understand the principles of persuasion, the drivers in our psych, the things that made us tick. Some of these principles are so fundamentally basic in human interaction that from my point of view if someone is lacking some of them, I would worry. If you want to create giants, make an effort to discover real similarities between you and your team and offer genuine praise. People like those who like them (liking principle). Also understand that people will invariably pay in kind (reciprocity principle), therefore, pay special attention to give to others what you want in return. But when say this, I say giving to others with no expectation of receiving anything as well. We live in a society where people follow the lead of similar others. If I identify myself with a group, I will most like tend to like what they like, go where they go, say what they say. It is a natural process called the social proof principle. In business, it is not different, the tallest giants are built using peer power. Yet again, the backdrop of such social proof principle is also another principle called consistency. People align with clear commitments, and hence if you make your commitments active, public and voluntary, and people identify with them and assume them for themselves, then you will start the molding form of giants. I know that all my talking sometimes tends to lead to thinking that a leader is liked by all, that leaders are always democratic, well not really. I also believe that the principle of authority is important, considering that people in general ‒when in doubt, will defer to an expert. Show your colors, expose your expertise, make it visible. It is naïve to think that people will recognize and appreciate your expertise if you have never even showed it and explicitly displayed it. Another factor in the giant-making machine touches the principle of scarcity. People want more of what they can have less of. I believe the first thing that popped into your minds was money ‒ or at least material things. In the corporate world, one of the most powerful currencies is called information. If you are the dispensary of exclusive information and are capable of highlighting its unique benefits of it, you are the most powerful person in the room. Creating the giants whose shoulders you will eventually stand on will also require a thorough understanding of the identities you carry in the corporate world. You are the manager and you are a leader, but keep in mind that each of them deals with very different corporate perspectives: Management is about planning and budgeting, and leadership is about the direction Management is about organizing, and leadership is about aligning Management is about control and problem-solving, and leadership is about motivation These three perspectives, aligned with the principles of persuasion, will equip your mindset to neatly codify your intuitive understanding of the way how people evaluate information and form decisions. These principles and alternative perspectives, if applied correctly, can steer decisions correctly and establish a strong base to create giants in your organization! Your life story, your authentic self, are the cornerstone for creating an environment where values and principles are practiced and balances the individual extrinsic and intrinsic motivations that empower people to lead and integrate their life by staying grounded… May you develop a well-established vision on what you want to accomplish, and that you have the energy to pull it through, the authority to make the hard decisions, and above all, that you have a clear strategic direction for people to follow. Be human, show your weakness (selectively), learn about the people around you by developing a sensor that will let you rely on your intuition and manage your team with tough empathy, show that you care about them and their work and dare to be different. That’s how you stand on the shoulders of giants! Follow me on LinkedIn for more info! Read more from Marcos! Marcos R. Dreher, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Marcos R. Dreher is an accomplished senior executive specializing in corporate strategy, marketing, and strategic intelligence. He has first-hand experience spanning different industries and business models paired with the ability to transfer methodologies and solutions from incubation to global go-to-market roadmaps. With an extensive international experience and fluency in six languages, he brings a robust mentoring toolbox developed across an extensive international experience and fine-tuned by a degree in Psychology, an MBA in General Management and Marketing, and a specialization in strategic marketing management at Harvard Business School.

Written by: Patricia Arboleda, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Here are the top traits any entrepreneur needs to adopt courageous leadership for ultimate success. Success in leadership is defined by a variety of factors, many of which might be outdated in today’s increasingly digital marketplace. While traditional leadership might focus on control and organization, courageous leadership opens the floor up for collaboration and exchange ‒ passing the threshold from boss to lead with just a few simple changes. How to Accept Courage in the Workplace Whether you are looking to build a successful team or hoping to influence the world around you, here are five of the most essential qualities of a courageous leader: Know You Can’t Do it Alone. Courageous leaders know that nothing truly innovative can be done alone. They foster a supportive team by ensuring that everyone has an equally essential seat at the table, making sure that every member is valued. Think of King Arthur’s round table, where each knight’s qualities had an even chance to shine. Grow your influence and respect by letting your team know you consider yourself one of them and are proud to do so. A courageous leader encourages pushback whenever necessary, taking feedback and welcoming collaboration at every turn. Though it’s never easy to receive criticism ‒constructive or otherwise ‒ taking feedback is an important part of ensuring that everyone’s ideas are heard, taken into account, and eventually incorporated. Courageous leadership views organization as a network and not a pyramid, fostering an atmosphere based on inclusion, teamwork, and diversity. Don’t be Afraid to Take Risks. Risk-taking is a pivotal part of being a courageous leader. We know that saying “having courage in your convictions” might be overkill, but it goes a long way in the world of inclusive leadership. Going against the grain (when it makes sense to) might be scary, but the portal of originality usually opens up to inspiring innovation that pays off. A recent study conducted by a team of renowned behavioral psychologists and published in the Journal of Applied Psychology revealed that people who take risks are more likely to be viewed as leaders. Carving a new path might feel lonely, but if your intuition feels right, the risk will be well worth the reward. Look for the things that constantly inspire you, fill the voids that need filling, and innovation will surely not be far too behind. Be Proud of Your Story. Traditional leaders tend to set themselves apart from their businesses; only encouraging the hierarchy keeps them at the top. Courageous leaders embed themselves into their teams, ideas and products, blending their own stories with the companies along the way. They know that people respond best to stories they resonate with, so sharing their own is a part of the lifestyle. According to the U.S. Chamber of Commerce, “Storytelling in leadership plays a big role in driving employee buy-in and improving worker engagement within a company.” Embedding your own story into that of your overall entrepreneurial vision makes it easier to connect to. Personal storytelling is a powerful tool for communicating a vision clearly and a guiding light for sending teams in the right direction. Ideas become more human where courageous leadership thrives. Speak Your Mind Whenever You Can. While being outspoken isn’t a necessary trait for a courageous leader, it definitely helps. Speaking your mind can have some serious problem-solving potential and has the ability to change the course of your entire entrepreneurial venture. Sticking to your guns sets you apart as a courageous leader, believing in your team’s ideas without a doubt. Courageous leaders seek out the things that need changing and aren’t afraid to discuss the elephant in the room ‒ no matter how long a specific industry has functioned in its presence. Thanks to outspoken leaders like Microsoft’s Satya Nadella, audiences are beginning to expect executives to speak their minds and establish their own voices in the fray. While you might not need to be as loud as others, showing your true colors can go a long way in building respect within your team and among your consumers. Let your voice be heard, and chances are that the world is all ears. Stay Unapologetically Yourself. Courageous leaders don’t embody what they think a leader should be like ‒ they stay true to who they are. This might mean that some personal work in discovering who you are as both a leader and a person might need to be done before a successful business can take off ‒ and that’s okay! In fact, it’s encouraged. Being authentic is essential for success, whether in your approach or how you interact with the world around you. The same goes for having the courage to be vulnerable. Admitting mistakes and growing from them together only works to strengthen your future success. Key Takeaways Shaking off the shackles of traditional leadership won’t be easy, but these essential tips are here to help guide you on the path to defining your success. Starting with a strong team, and ensuring their happiness and pride in the work you are doing together, is a great starting point. Use your story ‒ and that of your eventual goals ‒ as a North Star to set you and your business apart, inspiring others along the way. Stay innovative, risk-oriented, and outspoken whenever you can. These key traits will set you apart as a courageous leader in any fast-paced business environment. If you would like to strengthen your courageous leadership skills or learn about other ways you can advance your career, book a call. I would love to talk with you. Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn or visit my website for more info! Patricia Arboleda, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Patricia Arboleda is a certified Executive & Leadership Coach, Former Fortune 500 Senior Executive, keynote speaker, and the Founder of Arboleda Coaching. Through her interactive and transformative corporate and individual coaching programs, she empowers driven diverse leaders to accelerate their success, take their careers to the next level, and break through barriers to build the futures that they want and deserve.

Written by: Vince Morales, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Why does it matter so much what other people think of us? Why do we seek compliments, do anything for attention, or push ourselves to achieve just to win accolades? What’s wrong with us? Nothing’s wrong at all. It’s normal to want these things. Validation isn’t a bad thing, and it is, however, easily misused and misunderstood. Let’s explore the truth about what validation is and why we need it. We’ll also delve into what we do to seek validation in our daily lives and why we think we need it. What is Validation? Validation has many components that boil down to the simple idea of being accepted for who you are. It’s an acknowledgment that you’re experiencing specific thoughts and emotions that are very true to you and real. It tells you your experience is accepted, and by extension, so are you. Validation is a good thing, and we need it from the time we are children. Everyone wants their parents to accept them, which is generally our first craving for validation, easily satisfied. To a child, a simple phrase such as “Good job” or “I’m proud of you” can make the difference between a good experience and a bad one. This outside validation sets the stage for the future. You’ll grow in confidence and self-assurance if you receive it at the right times and in the right place as a child. You’ll start to adopt a healthy attitude about yourself and find you need less validation from outside sources. Instead, you learn to self-validate and give yourself the reassurances you need. After all, you know your thoughts are valid. You accept who you are and love the person you’re becoming. All is right with the world. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true. Without validation as a child or in instances where you’ve experienced trauma or abuse, it’s easy to lose sight of these simple facts. You start craving the outside validation only others can give because you can’t give it to yourself. You’ll adopt behaviors designed to draw attention to yourself to get the validation you feel you need. The social media trend aims to strike down the need for validation when that perspective comes from the antithetical experience of validation. Out goes the baby with the bath water. The result of that perspective appears to manifest a bitter point of view of validation because we don’t know how to provide validation to ourselves. We need to tune up our validation of ourselves, so we know how to properly provide validation to others. Personally and socially, the current pulse is authentic validation requires recalibration, not elimination. Strike down validation, and we risk falling deeper into the failure of providing sincere and empowering validation to children. How will children learn healthy and empowering validation when parents, a by-product of the social condition around them, believe validation from others is useless and unnecessary? The critical thing to remember here is how validation is a beautiful tool that can help us in so many ways…so long as you use it correctly. Validation doesn’t have to be a bad thing. It can, however, get us into a lot of trouble when we let it rule our lives. If validation is terrible, why do parents try to provide it to their children? Any good thing can be used negatively. Do you throw it out or cancel it? Now, you learn the proper way to use it. Our society was canceling validation when it was intended to be one of the more beautiful and necessary things. The more frequently we throw validation out of our lives, the more validation becomes a creepy stranger to us. We only view it through the wrong and obscured lens. As we seek the ship of validation, I think we can expect kindness, love, and hope to be next in line since they are all fellow family to validation. Reasons Why We Seek Outside Validation The problem is we really need validation in our lives, which serves many purposes. We want to know we’re being heard by those around us. We need to know our emotional journey is acceptable and that we’re feeling the right things at the right time. We want reassurance we’re accepted by our peer group. We feel reassured when our beliefs are shown to be in line with the beliefs of others. We want to feel like we’re connected in some way to those around us. We want to feel like we matter and are essential to those we care about. We want to be seen for who we are. We need to know we’re normal. We need to know we’re okay. Validation is the key to all of this. Validation is also the healing balm we need when we’re wounded emotionally. Counselors and psychologists even use validation to aid us in recovery from trauma. Validation is what heals us from past abuse and helps us find things we can like about ourselves when we cannot see these things. “We don’t see things as they are; we see them as we are” – AnaÏs Nin Of course, we shouldn’t need these strategies to feel good about ourselves. Validation should come internally from how we think and feel about ourselves, not those around us. This can seem hard, though, especially if you have issues from the past to work through. Validation-Seeking Behaviors There’s a problem with outside validation, which people don’t always discuss. It can very quickly become something we train ourselves to want. Stop a moment and think about how you would create a new habit. Like most people, you would probably take the easy route and find a way to reward yourself for doing the right thing. We do it all the time, in fact. You want to exercise more, so you come up with little treats (like buying new clothes or doing something nice for yourself) whenever you spend a certain amount of time exercising. “Personally and socially, the current pulse is authentic validation requires recalibration, not elimination.” – Vince Morales Unfortunately, this system sets you up to eventually fail. We grow bored with the reward we’ve set and demand something bigger or better to get us to do what we feel is unpleasant. This is why it’s better to consider the exercise itself as the reward. With validation, we feel good when we get it. It’s already the perfect reward. The only thing you need to do to get it is to find the correct behavior which triggers these feelings. The shortcuts we learn to validation tend to come from daily life. We pay someone a compliment, and they give us their appreciation in return. We soon find ourselves giving out more compliments – whether we mean them or not – because the payoff is so easy. This also means we can become so focused on the validation that we don’t even realize what we’re doing to get it. We train ourselves to act subconsciously and, as a result, don’t see what we’re doing until someone else points it out. The behaviors have become natural to us, partly because we’ve been doing them for so long, but more likely because we’ve been seeing other people around us doing them too. This is all just how people act, right? This is especially noticeable if we spend time on social media, which gives us an accessible platform for attention-seeking. This isn’t just limited to our friend list, though. We also see these same behaviors on our favorite TV shows or movies, making validation-seeking behaviors seem normal, as though they’re an expected part of life. See if any of these sound familiar to you: The Chameleon A chameleon is known for blending into the background, a trait developed as a defense against predators. Unfortunately, this was a survival trait in primitive days, which carried over to modern times. After all, if your tribe accepts you as one of them, their protection extends to you. If you agree with what people say when you’re talking to them, regardless of whether or not you personally agree with their stance, you might be a chameleon. Chameleons tend to do this when they want people to like them and feel disagreeing might jeopardize their standing. The Flatterer People love compliments, and they also tend to love the people who give out compliments. This can lead to a lot of flattery on their part, especially if they are uncertain whether the other person likes them or not. The reasoning? Whether meant or not, a well-timed compliment might just tip the balance on their behalf. The Pity Partier It’s expected to feel a little upset when someone points out a flaw or tells you you’re wrong. If this can destroy your day, lead to a lot of self-pity or even over-dramatic reactions (“How DARE they!”), it might be because you were hoping for validation from the other person, not criticism. Pity Partiers try to salvage the situation by seeking validation from those around them for being hurt. (“Did you see what they DID to ME?”) Remember, commiseration is validation coupled with sympathy. The Go-To Does it sometimes feel as though everyone wants a favor from you? The Go-To never says ‘no’ to anything, and their goal is to gain praise and validation for all they do. The key phrase the Go-To wants to hear falls along these lines: “I don’t know how you manage to do it…” or “You’re amazing. I knew I could count on you.” The Talker Sometimes our validation comes at the cost of someone else. The talker loves to talk. They can almost guarantee an audience by sharing the latest gossip, spreading rumors, and even lying (the more sensational, the better). Social media has made this particular form of validation almost too easy. All they need to do to share the latest is post a few words that everyone can see. Validation comes in the form of ‘likes’ and ‘shares,’ the more, the better. The Apologizer Sometimes we draw attention to ourselves by saying, “I’m sorry.” While an apology is merited when you wrong someone, some people use the apology almost as a weapon. They’ll say they’re sorry for everything going on around in the hope of a scrap of validation. They’ll even apologize for things that don’t require any kind of apology, such as, “I’m sorry for standing here…” just because they want to hear the other person say, “No, you’re fine. I like having you around.” The Authority Have you ever pretended to know something you didn’t understand to make people think better of you? If so, this one might sound familiar. The authority fakes knowledge in everything from pretending to read the book everyone is talking about all the way down to faking knowledge in a job interview just to get a job. The authority loves when people fall for their actions because it makes them feel important when validated by those around them. The Fisherman “Don’t you just love my haircut?” Whenever you use leading questions of this nature, you’re fishing for compliments, drawing them out unwillingly from those around you. The fisherman depends on people being too ‘nice’ to give them anything other than what they want. The worst part? More often than not, they get what they’re looking for. The Individual Sometimes we act so wild and crazy that the world can’t help but look. But is validation for being eccentric or wildly unique all it’s cracked up to be? By showing how different they are from everyone else, the Individual gets attention wherever they go just by looking outlandish, living ‘larger than life,’ or being so ‘over the top’ they absolutely cannot be ignored. The Activist Being passionate about a cause is a good thing. Some people become very good at using causes to get attention. People who seek validation through activism tend to be at the forefront of their cause of choice. They’ll be out there making sure the entire world sees their involvement and notices them. They live for the praise their efforts bring, which makes them great fundraisers (they want their numbers to be higher than anyone else’s) and will never shy away from speaking up when there’s a wrong to be righted. The complicated thing about activists is they might genuinely be passionate about their cause. You can spot them by looking at how they manage their involvement. Are they out there talking about the project, or are they focusing on their involvement with the project? There’s a definite difference. The Martyr Finally, our desire for validation sometimes leads us to never complain about anything, even when we have a good cause. The martyr-like to make a big deal out of how noble they are. Suppose you see someone letting people walk all over them but always making a point of expressing how much they’re putting up with but making no effort to change the situation. In that case, you might have a martyr problem. Their goal is to gain validation through sympathy because of everything they’re going through. While we all might fall into the validation trap sometimes, it isn’t a problem until the situation becomes chronic. If you regularly find yourself gravitating toward these kinds of behaviors, you might have a problem. I encourage you to continue tuning your perception and perspective about validation, why we need it, what we do to seek validation in our daily lives, and why we think we need it. Reassess why we believe what we believe about it. Shift your mindset and implement a healthy and empowering model of validation. We have plenty of naysayers who operate on the destructive side of it. It’s time for heroes of validation to arise and model the healthy validation we need right now in our homes and society. For more info, follow me on Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, and visit my website! Read more from Vince! Vince Morales, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Vince Morales is a mindset, self-image, and resilience coach. In addition, he is skilled in leadership consultation and development. From April 2016 to June 2017, Vince was a homeless veteran in San Diego, CA. While homeless, he made a powerful decision to change his thinking and mindset, launching into life coaching. He developed a niche for resilience and mindset coaching. The growth of his business ultimately led to the end of his homelessness. Vince is the Founder of Validus Coaching & Consulting, formerly Zoe Transformation. His story has been featured in online articles and online news outlets all over the U.S. He is a certified John Maxwell Team Coach, Trainer, & Speaker, as well as a motivational speaker. In 2021, Vince earned his Master's degree in Psychology of Leadership from Penn State University and is currently a doctoral student pursuing a Ph.D. in Performance Psychology. He is a 2020 inductee into The National Society of Leadership and Success.

Written by: Martin J. Fisher, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Selling is a hard but necessary part of the business. But it's so hard not to feel like a used car salesman when you're trying to close. Because of this, so many entrepreneurs hold off on selling altogether. They're afraid of coming across as pushy or slimy, so they stay in their comfort zone and never try to sell at all. But the truth is, you can't grow your business without selling. At some point, you have to put yourself out there and close some deals. Otherwise, you'll never make any progress. So how can you sell without feeling like a used car salesman? Here are a few tips: 1. Be transparent. The used car salesman stereotype is all about being secretive and deceptive. But you're not a used car salesman, so don't act like one. Be transparent with your prospects from the beginning. Tell them what you're selling and why you're selling it. Be upfront about the benefits and the drawbacks. And most importantly, be honest about your prices. Don't try to trick people into buying something they don't need. Just be open and honest, and let them make the decision for themselves. 2. Build trust. Relationships are key in business. If you want to close more deals, you need to build trust with your prospects. The best way to do this is by providing value. Show them that you're an expert in your field and that you're here to help them solve their problems. Give them resources and advice, even if they don't end up buying anything from you. The more value you provide, the more likely they are to trust you. And once they trust you, they'll be much more likely to do business with you. 3. Lead with service. Remember, you're not trying to swindle someone out of their cash. You're a business that's providing a service. One that can help make your prospect's life better. With that in mind, lead with service. Put your prospect's needs first and show them how you can help them. If you do this, selling will become a lot easier (and a lot less sleazy). Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, Linkedin, Twitter, and YouTube or visit my website. Read more from Martin! Martin J. Fisher, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Martin is a Life Results Coach with a proven track record as a healthcare professional and corporate executive. He left that all behind to follow his calling to serve clients to create fulfilling lives they love. His expertise in health & wellness, pivoting & developing careers, and life patterns unite into the perfect holistic approach when creating your new life.

Written by: Shaniece Benson, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Staying motivated is not easy in a world full of distractions. A key part of maintaining motivation is staying present and aware. It is easy to get off track when there are so many things to do that we have a hard time focusing on what is in front of us. Part of building motivation is being gentle with yourself and having a system in place that will support you in achieving your goals. This includes taking care of yourself through the process and celebrating those small successes. I will leave you with some different tips to help you stay motivated, but it will be up to you to become more aware of what motivates you, and what structure and habits help you to maintain it. 3 Tips To Stay Motivated 1. Set Goals Goals help give you direction, a place you can focus on that is measurable and has an endpoint. It’s important to break larger goals into smaller manageable steps that will help you build momentum and confidence as you move towards accomplishing larger goals. Make sure your goals are meaningful to you and not driven by what you think you “should” do based on others’ opinions. When your goals are meaningful to you, it is easier to accomplish them. Share your goals with friends and let other people help you accomplish them; this all helps with motivation. Sit down and write out your larger goals and then break them down into small more achievable steps. Break it down, so you know what you need to do each day to get you moving in the right direction. Put in your calendar; when you will work on and achieve these steps, make it specific and easy to follow. It can also be helpful to plan a reward for after you complete that step, either internal praise, some tv or social media time, or some nurturing self-care, so you reinforce this behavior right away. This will make it easier to accomplish more. 2. Celebrate Success Too often to we try to rush through our to-do lists without ever sitting back and celebrating everything we have accomplished. When we fail to see how much we have grown and done it can be hard to keep up the momentum. Take time to savor and acknowledge the small success and how far you have come! This helps build motivation. 3. Self-Care Although one may feel they are too busy for self-care, taking time to take care of yourself will help you build motivation. Self-care boosts your energy, mood, and ability to focus. When we run on anxiety and worry it is hard to think clearly and stay focused. You will achieve a lot more if your nervous system is regulated and calm as you approach your goals. Taking breaks to exercise and meditate will help you achieve even more than if you just try to push yourself all the way through. Remember also that TV and social media breaks might feel restful, but they won’t restore your nervous system. When you find you have lost motivation and gotten distracted, there are a couple of different steps you can take to get back on track. Remember to be gentle with yourself as you step back into your routine and healthy habits. Here are some steps you can take when you have lost motivation and gotten off track. 3 Tips To Get Back on Track and Build Motivation 1. Be Mindful When you have gotten off track, it is important to be mindful to check-in, and notice that this is what is happening. We have to notice things to change them. As you notice this, it’s also important to be compassionate with yourself. Take your own hand and coach yourself through what you need to get done rather than being critical. We all fall off track sometimes, and when we can compassionately guide ourselves back there, it is a lot easier than falling into guilt or shame. 2. Get Organized Often, we get off track because we have lost our rhythm. To get back on track, take some time to organize yourself. This may mean taking a day to just do some chores around the house or re-organizing your space to help with productivity. Write out a to-do list and make a schedule of when you will achieve these things this week. If you are feeling overwhelmed or burnout, make sure you also organize some time for self-care so you can feel recharged and focused. 3. Just Start Once you have mindfully and compassionately noticed you have fallen off track, make a plan to get back on it. Remember, motivation often comes after action, so even if you do not “feel” like starting, just hold your hand and begin. At first, commit to small action steps that do not feel overwhelming and build from there. You can do it! Need assistance, book a consultation call HERE! Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Shaniece! Shaniece Benson, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Shaniece is a High-Performance Fitness & Lifestyle Coach who empowers busy professionals to step into success through her 1:1 fitness training & lifestyle coaching. Featured in Southern New Hampshire University, SDVoyager, SHOUTOUT SOCAL, and Zovio for her unique and effective ways of tackling limiting beliefs and creating a new regime to feel good from the inside out. Inspired by a drive to change the narrative of familial history connected to a variety of health conditions, Shaniece began to change some habits and fall in love with fitness. In doing so, she noticed a dramatic shift not only in her physical but also in her mental health. With her energy levels soaring and confidence boosted, Shaniece wanted to shout from the rooftops how incredibly great this all felt; and how simple it could be for others to do the same. Thus, BloombyShaniece was born, a blog specifically designed to share content that would help women grow and embrace their true potential. She later began to work with professionals from an array of backgrounds in helping them not only to lose weight but also to encourage them to live an all-around healthier lifestyle. With training and coaching sessions specifically tailored to individual needs, Shaniece empowers her clients by informing, supporting, and celebrating them in making big changes as they embark on the journey of living their best lives.

Written by: Michelle Schafer, Senior Level Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. I remember my very first interview coaching client like it was yesterday (even though it was seven years ago!). At the end of the practice interview, I asked him what he felt worked well before I provided my input. He replied, “I did a good job answering all the questions.” He was right – he did provide a response to each question. However, where he missed the mark was in the specifics; he neglected to provide examples from his career past and kept all details at a high level. His responses would have made it hard for the interviewers to assess whether he could do the job, even though his resume indicated he was qualified. Does this sound familiar? Do you tell yourself that you answered the questions well, when in reality your responses would not secure the job? As a career coach, I coach clients on the most effective ways to respond to interview questions, in a way that conveys impact and value. In fact, of all the services I offer, I love interview coaching the most. It is incredibly rewarding to be able to help a client strengthen their confidence, work through their fear and prepare for an interview so they land a job they really want. I often hear cries of “but this is so much work!” It absolutely is, but if you really want the job, then you need to invest a proportional amount of preparation to reflect this desire. So, how can you interview with success and secure a job you love? Here are 7 tips you can use: Forecast questions using the job posting : Generally speaking, companies will ask questions about skills and competencies highlighted in the job posting. For instance, if the job involves accurately inputting data, a question that may be asked is “Tell us about a time when you recognized a discrepancy in your work – how did you respond?” Or, if the role involves leading teams, a good question would be “describe how you motivate team members.” The clues are right in the posting. Document responses to forecasted questions: Type out these responses so you have a “cheat sheet” to refer to on the day of the interview, and use the STAR format – situation, task, action and result. It’s easy to get lost in sharing the contextual details of your story, because you may feel the need to help the interviewers fully understand the situation (or problem) before you can describe how you solved it. Here’s a framework that can help you structure responses without the answer becoming a “runaway train”: situation = 2 sentences, action = 4-8 sentences (depending on the complexity of the issue) and the result/outcome = 2-3 sentences. And a bonus – adding in what you learned or an insight that helped you take action. Create a matrix of examples by theme: This can complement your work documenting responses to specific examples. The matrix would be one page – on the left side, list all the themes from the job posting (eg. customer service, leadership, project management). On the right, briefly describe two specific examples of how you have applied this in your career. This way, if there is more than one question on a single theme from the job posting, you have another example ready to go. Provide specific examples even if the question doesn’t ask for one: By providing evidence and proof for as many questions as possible, you can showcase your fit for the job. For example, for the question “describe how you build relationships with external stakeholders,” you can describe your approach, then anchor your response with a specific example from your work experience. And, if you had to work through some challenges to build this relationship, this makes a great story to share! Be especially ready for key questions that are prone to rambling answers: “Tell me about yourself” is one such question where you can lose the interviewers in the details. Answer this question like you are responding to the question, “Why should we hire you?” First, summarize your experience (including sectors worked, positions of escalating responsibility and education necessary for the role). Then, highlight skills you have developed over your career that align with the job. Another question that can trip people up is “Why are you looking for opportunities?” If you haven’t prepared your “leave story” in advance, you may end up sharing more details than you need – and with a level of emotion that you’d rather not reveal in the interview. Practice, practice, practice: More practice leads to increased comfort and confidence in delivering responses, and a heightened ability to recall the specific examples that showcase your fit for the job. Practice on Zoom, practice in front of a mirror, practice with your partner – even practice with your dog! Use “I” vs “we”: When you say, “We led the workshop” or “We proactively resolved the client’s complaint,” it’s hard for the interviewers to know what your specific contribution was. Using “I” language can clarify this. Interviewing is a skill, and one that can be challenging to develop when nervousness or lack of preparation gets in the way. Although some people will claim they are more effective in an interview without preparing, I never recommend to clients that they “wing it.” With these tips, you can confidently tell your “happiest ending stories” (like in a fairy tale) and secure the job you want. Follow me on Facebook, Li nkedin, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Michelle! Michelle Schafer, Senior Level Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Michelle Schafer is an International Coaching Federation Certified Coach and Facilitator specializing in career transition and leadership. She is the owner and founder of Michelle Schafer Coaching, empowering people to achieve career fulfillment. Michelle has personally experienced two significant career transitions through restructuring and has reinvented herself for new careers both times. She deeply understands the physical, emotional and mental impact associated with a job search. Michelle is passionate about people and inspired by their progress, working with clients at all levels of an organization and across sectors including federal and municipal government, high tech, not-for-profit and financial services. Michelle offers coaching 1:1 in groups and recently was certified in the foundations of team coaching with the Global Team Coaching Institute.

Written by: Emi Olausson Fourounjieva, Senior Level Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Storytelling is an amazing enabler for Successful Digital Transformation and Business Growth. It has the power to inspire and motivate, to gather people around vision and strategy. We are all brought up with stories, storytelling is in our DNA, so why not use it more for Business Growth? Recently I participated in the Measurecamp Stockholm ‒ a fantastic event for the Data and Analytics community, with super engaged participants from 14 countries. Data Storytelling was a very relevant topic for many of them, so I decided to run a session on “Data Storytelling and the Winning Business Mindset”, together with my colleague from Denmark. We’ve got so many listeners that some of them were sitting on the floor! It was a great surprise to be able to share my knowledge and experience in such a fantastic way, and to hear all those words of appreciation and gratitude afterwards! Why is Storytelling so important for successful Business Transformation? Having a common vision is a really important goal, but spreading this vision and introducing clarity across the organization, when you are going through some shifts and difficulties, is even more important. Usually there is a lot of resistance, unexpected issues and underwater stones on the way. Storytelling helps keep the eyes on the North Star of the Business, engaging both stakeholders and team members to take steps toward that vision. Storytelling is a critical part of the decision-making process, it helps to create common ground and alignment along the process of transformation. Stories can reduce Silo effect on a cross-functional level, as well as help participants of the process understand each other better and share important information, get on board needed support and missing solutions. There is a lot of information within any organization, and sometimes essential details get lost in the noise of communication, processes and overload. Well-formulated and properly presented stories activate many layers of growth, for example, better collaboration, efficiency and a feeling of common goal, purpose and belonging. Activation of hidden gems in the form of creativity and professional talents is another advantage of this approach. Storytelling is a super powerful tool to provide meaning, create context and engage ‒ in order to attract needed resources, enable the winning strategy and disrupt the old patterns and structures. Data Storytelling is a powerful opportunity to gather the whole organization or its units around a certain vision and present an engaging way forward, toward the chosen target. Through my years in Digital, I helped to transform many global companies, and Storytelling was a fantastic tool I was using to lead, inspire and motivate. I have been sharing my insights for years with Senior Leaders, as an international speaker. Today I’m sharing a few golden nuggets with you ‒ some recommendations based on my extensive experience and best practices, which can help you enable data-driven decision-making and introduce alignment within the organization. Don't simply show your data ‒ tell a story with it! Turn data into a pivotal point in your story Understand the importance of context and audience (there might be different stories depending on whom the story is for and what is the desired action point) Recognize and eliminate the clutter clouding your information Direct your audience's attention to the most important parts of your data Use design concepts in data visualization, keep it engaging and easy to understand Leverage the power of Storytelling to help your message resonate with your audience Make sure it enables the desired outcomes and actions Fuel continuous improvement within your organization with Storytelling! Gather stories from the bottom-up and spread strategic messages from the top-down. Create a consistent and compelling image of your organization’s mission and reasons for pursuing transformation! Use different ways to share stories of transformation: present information written, spoken, in visual and auditory forms. Be creative and innovative, communicate in a clear way, convey trust, engage, inspire, motivate and enjoy the process! Follow me on Facebook, LinkedIn and visit my website for more info! Read more from Emi! Emi Olausson Fourounjieva, Senior Level Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Emi Olausson Fourounjieva is a Transformational Coach, Digital Transformation Leader with extensive experience in Digital Analytics and Marketing, Visionaire, Educator and Global Speaker, Advisor on the Advisory Board of two global professional networks. Her strength is to create synergy effects using resources and technologies to get optimal business results in a data-driven, customer-centric way. Emi's initiative "Digital Transformation for Humans" reflects her passion for the intersection of Technology, Business and Human Factors. Her professional experience has led her to the conclusion that Digital Transformation must be boosted not only by the power of data, research, algorithms and technologies but also by human intuition, creativity and adaptability, in order to obtain harmonious and sustainable development. Through her coaching, Emi empowers Leaders to combine their Intelligence and Competence with Soft Skills, helping them become more confident and self-aware, feel positive, have more impact, and achieve goals with ease and joy. Emi sees Mindset as a critical part of any successful Leader's toolbox, which is why she has developed her signature coaching program, "The Winning Mindset for Leaders in Digital".