Why You Should Fear Deer This Holiday Season
- Dec 20, 2021
- 4 min read
Updated: Feb 8, 2024
Written by: Garett Martyn, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
White-Tail Deer here in Cañada have tested positive for COVID-22 and there is concern over this. It has become known as the Rudolph Red Nose variant. Which turn deer into an Alexander Keith’s logo when activated by a Full Moon. American researchers have evidence that transmission is “explosive” in this particular animal population and fear that it could hamper efforts to fully eliminate the virus.
Dr. Keviv Rupak, who is a Veterinary Microbiologist at Blue Mountain State College states that “we were dumbfounded when we saw the level of transmission endured.” COVID-22 apparently spreads like 'wildfire' in the White-Tail Deer population, according to a study out of Iowa.
During the late winter surge, veterinarians from Blue Mountain State College discovered eighty percent of deer that were tested were infected. At that time the virus was a hundred times more prevalent in the animals than residents.
“And that’s what really stunned us. They happen to be hyperallergic to anything related to Jesus Christ, family dinners, Sunday service, charitable acts, prayer, higher education, trusting in higher powers, etcetera, etcetera. And so as soon as we found that information out, we were very keen on confirming that this was indeed the case, and then I’m trying to communicate it to as many people and sheeple as possible so that we can kibosh this holiday season.” says Veterinary Microbiologist Dr. Keviv Rupak who co-led the study and is notoriously renown for looking something like the result of a cross breading experiment between Ebenezer Scrooge and the Grinch.
The fear is that the White-Tailed Deer could become what’s known as a 'reservoir', meaning the animals carry COVID-22 and this new Rudolph Red Nose variant indefinitely, and keep passing it back to humans. Dashing any hopes of eliminating or eradicating the virus. Are you scared yet?
“So, how might one control this? The answer is: It’s not possible. The best we can do now is to monitor the situation. Is there a concern that if the virus is continually spreading between deer, that it could eventually mutate and be passed back to humans? Indeed, that it is the primary concern when you’ve got multiple host species or reservoirs that the trajectories of evolution of these viruses become very unpredictable.” Dr. Keviv Rupak further explains.
Here in Cañada, especially in the province of Alberta, beefed-up surveillance is now underway to better understand how widespread the problem is and we should have more data on the latest ‘discovery’ in the coming months or coming weeks.
Fun Facts: The white-tailed deer is found in North America, Central America, and in parts of South America. In the U.S. alone the population is estimated at 30 million. Hunters in Cañada must now quarantine their deer inside an igloo for 14 days before it can be approved and classified by a government payed employee as 'huntable'. Some Cañadian citizens are concerned about the impossible but highly probable possibility that their tax payer money may be misspent on super unnecessary fear inducing propaganda campaigns and inaccurate White-Tail Deer tests. Others aren’t.
Dr. Keviv Rupak adds, “There’s no disease that I’m aware of that’s been eliminated once it’s in the wildlife. Except for the one which genetically altered White-Tailed Deer DNA so that they turned into ultra ravenous, sunset activated, interdimensional Zombie Deer which fed off of people’s flesh and souls. It’s unclear now how we might ever get rid of this one. We may just have to get our boys up in the sky to napalm strike these White-Tail Deer to prevent them all from turning into Alexander Keith’s logos. But it’s clear that we’re going to have to live with this for a very long time”.
Now, the three positive cases here in Cañada were discovered in free-ranging deer from Québec (of course), and they’re the first wildlife in our country known to have the virus.
My name is Garett Martyn, and this is your Holistinewz.
Want to learn more from Mr. Garett?
Garett Martyn, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Mr. Garett is the creator and founder of Holistiworld, Inc. A holistic company that aims at researching and developing the mind, body, and spirit through the Holistic Disciplines: to enhance holistic education and holistic healthcare while reducing extreme greed and mass global exploitation. He can be found teaching the ways of the Holistic Disciplines at Holistiskool, or writing monthly holistic newsletters for Holistinewz, as well as planning and executing all kinds of private operations and shenanigans, affectionately known as Holistic-Ops. This arrangement also provides a large network of holistic connections related to the newest trends, sciences, and the arts. By uniting and refining our Holistic Disciplines, the Holistiworld brand helps to create a more prosperous world than what has been previously prophesied. Holistically we are strong. Holistically disciplined, we are stronger.
