Why We Need To Have Open And Honest Conversations About Death And Dying
Written by: Karen Peddie, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
It is so important to have open and honest conversations about death and dying but actually starting one can be very difficult. Many people are uncomfortable talking about death, particularly their own and really do not want to talk about it. There are any number of reasons for this, but I would say the biggest one is fear.
Death is often seen as something to be feared, which is something EFT can help with. It is the only thing we can be 100% certain of and yet only around 60% of people actually make provision for it. So, what happens with the other 40%?
If I was to ask you if you had made a Will, what would you say? If you answered NO, what reason would you give? Some people insist they have ‘nothing to leave’. Some just say ‘not bothered, I’ll be dead’. Others just don’t get around to doing anything at all because they ‘haven’t thought about it’
So, let’s look at these reasons…
Nothing to leave – everyone has something! It may not be property, vehicles or masses of money but what about clothes, shoes, furniture, phone, social media accounts, emails, laptop, tablet? What will happen to all this ‘stuff’? Who will deal with it?
Not bothered, I’ll be dead – Who will know what to do about your funeral? Do you want to be buried or cremated for example and who will deal with your estate? Without a Last Will and Testament at the very least, it is possible the state will get everything. Would you be happy with that? Or, would you prefer your treasured possessions go to a family member, friend or to a charity?
Haven’t thought about it – this is common, particularly with younger people or people who have not had to deal the death of a loved one before. After all, if you don’t know about end of life planning you can’t do anything about it, and that’s ok. But now you do maybe now is the time to think about it!
The thing is, if we don’t make provision or plan for what we want to happen, we can leave an awful mess for someone else to try and sort out. This may fall to close relatives or friends, who want to do the best for you but have no idea where to start. They are grieving your loss too, so making decisions may be difficult for them. Having a plan they can follow, with all the information they need will reduce stress and may even save you money.
Making a start
I am just in the process of doing my own end of life plan. Although this is part of my training to become a Licensed Planning Facilitator, I want to know my daughter has all the information she may need. I really don’t want her to stress and worry like I did when my Mum died.
Even though Mum was terminally ill, we were able to talk about what she wanted to happen in the last few weeks of her life, and I made sure it happened. One thing we didn’t talk about was her funeral so I had to choose hymns, readings and make arrangements hoping she would approve. It was so stressful because I wanted to get everything perfect for her. I didn't want to let her down.
I can’t say that putting my own plan together is easy, it’s not. It does raise issues that I don’t want to deal with right now, but that’s ok, I’ve made a start. It is also an opportunity to review things I already have in place and make sure the details are still relevant. More importantly, I can change my mind if I want to, because it’s MY plan and it’s flexible!
If this has got you thinking and you would like to know how to put your own plan together, drop me an email and let’s start open and honest conversations.
Karen Peddie, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Karen is a natural, intuitive Energy Healer who uses Reiki, Emotional Freedom Techniques, and Meditation to help her clients improve their health and well-being. She works with them to identify and heal the root cause of any dis-ease which could be blocking the flow of energy either physically, mentally, or emotionally. As someone who suffered from anxiety, stress, and depression for many years, Karen's experience makes her a genuine, empathetic therapist who creates a safe, calm space in which to start the healing process
