Why Some People Leave You Drained and What That Really Means About Energy
- Brainz Magazine
- Jun 4
- 4 min read
Written by Katie Queue, Life Coach and Spiritual Guide
Katie Queue is a gifted and well-known psychic medium and life coach with a unique background in both corporate and spirituality. Voted "Top Psychic" and with continually rising acclaim, Katie's reputation in the spiritual community speaks for itself. With over 10,000 positive reviews worldwide.

As someone who works with people all over the world from a coaching capacity, there is something that happens regularly that I just don’t hear getting talked about enough. It is influence. Do you believe in frequency? A radio, for example, you turn it to a certain frequency to hear a certain channel. If that channel projected violent music and distasteful lyrics, over time, you would feel bad and unhappy. This seems pretty much like common sense and something that is well known; however, now think of people as the same thing. Ever had a family member or friend who reaches out, and then for some reason, everything goes wrong? Perhaps you had some success and you’re at the top of your game and this person pops up again, perhaps all it took was one conversation for them to affect you, which inadvertently leads to a bit of a bad week. Was it something they said or just the energy of the person coming in?

Have you seen a friend or a partner visit family and they come back and they feel a shadow of themselves and are not so engaged? What is that? What do you think? There is something so vacuous about them, but the bond is there, the love, but at what point do you not see the inevitable which is, admitting that the person you have a strong bond with or a perceived obligation is in fact so energetically draining that the frequency you were on is no longer relevant and just by engaging you have been taken to a much lower one.
Some people are like mud; they refuse to rise, they refuse to do better because they benefit too much from the manipulations. Most people do have a moral compass, which helps them navigate in a way that does not compromise that. They don’t want to benefit financially from corruption, they don’t want to take you off of your goals and mission and they certainly don’t want to upset you, but the ones who are like mud, there’s a satiating feeling of enjoying dragging you down, perhaps they feel less alone? Perhaps they like the idea of having more people on their level because then they can live the life they want and on their terms, rather than encompass the ideology of and thoughtfulness of recognising others are on this planet too.
Such vacuous people are very self-centred, narcissistic by nature and they really want to pull what is around them towards them so they get served as the higher power. On some visceral level, they want to be served as a God and not as a servant of God. There are many layers to this and the first indicator of such is how you feel and how your week has been after such indication. To give you some context on this, a client of mine, every time she heard from a family member, of whom had spent the majority of her life talking bad about her to others and painting a really bad picture of her being a selfish individual, all of which was not true, so she pulled away and had minimum contact, recognising that her family were using her as a scapegoat. They tried to rebuild bridges, and years had passed, and then one day, one of them reached out to her. It seemed short and ok, nothing bad was said, but her week and the week after that suffered. She found her bills went up, and she was stressed; she even had a pipe burst. It was as if that one interaction with that kind of energy had completely poisoned her life.
Some people are so toxic that boundaries don’t work. So what do you do?
Recognise that this is a spiritual war. Should you experience their energy, send it back to them, cleanse yourself and meditate. Sweat it out and speak it out. Get that energy that has hooked in out of your system and get back onto your frequency. One of the ways this type of person can weave back into your energy field is by confusion. So many times, this type just carries on like normal, even after an abusive encounter, which is really quite concerning. This all sounds like a narcissist, right? Or psychopathic. What’s important here is not to focus on why they are like this or mine for the root cause of their disruptive behaviour, but instead to just recognise what their energy, the one they never work on, the one they don’t want to change, and focus on how that affects you. Keep it simple and act accordingly. Energy is a very real and potent thing and not all energy can mix. Something sinister can be going on and you will see by the way your week works out after the interaction. Live your life by understanding energy and not listening to people's words, and you’ll move a lot quicker through life.
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Thank you for your time today!
Read more from Katie Queue
Katie Queue, Life Coach and Spiritual Guide
Katie Queue is a leader in her field. She is the editor-in-chief of two magazines, Katie Queue Magazine and the Impact Formula, where she has featured Grammy Award Winners, Ivor Novello Award Nominees, Record Breakers and many more. The Impact Formula is making an impact and has a reach of 410,000 people. Katie also has a growing podcast audience with over 10,000 plays. Katie works with celebrities and non-celebrities to help them carve out a more confident and authentic version of themselves.