The Energetic Cost of Over-Giving and How to Stop Pouring From an Empty Cup
- Brainz Magazine
- Aug 26
- 4 min read
Written by Hendrina Sterling Rodriguez, Trauma Alchemist & Voice Catalyst | Founder, The IF Wellbeing Hub & Mind Empower Therapy
Hendrina Sterling is an award-winning therapist, speaker, and founder of Mind Empower Therapy. She helps high-achievers and couples transform emotional pain into clarity, resilience, and purpose.
Do you constantly feel drained despite your best intentions to help others? Discover how over-giving silently depletes your life force and how you can reclaim your energy, balance, and sovereignty.
The silent burnout of over-giving
For years, I dedicated my life to helping others heal, grow, and thrive. As a psychotherapist, I held space for hundreds, listening deeply, guiding them through heartbreak, grief, and transformation. On the outside, I had everything a professional could want: success, recognition, and impact.
But beneath the surface, something darker was happening. I wasn’t just supporting clients, I was absorbing them. Their fears, their pain, their shadows, they all became a second skin I didn’t know how to take off.
This is the hidden truth of over-giving. It isn’t just about saying “yes” too often. It’s about unconsciously giving away your energy, piece by piece, until there’s nothing left for yourself, your family, or your own dreams.
The paradox: Giving more, feeling less
You don’t need to be a healer or leader to understand this. Many of us over-give: Parents who pour everything into their children but never refill themselves.
Professionals who always go the extra mile at work, but collapse at home. Friends who carry everyone’s burdens while their own needs remain invisible.
We live in a culture that glorifies self-sacrifice and labels boundaries as selfish. Yet the paradox is clear: the more we over-give, the less present, joyful, and effective we become.
Over-giving doesn’t make you noble, it makes you depleted.
The new paradigm: Energetic sovereignty
What I discovered is that energetic sovereignty is the true currency of wellbeing. Just as you wouldn’t run a bank account into the red, you cannot endlessly spend your emotional and energetic reserves.
Energetic sovereignty means:
Protecting what comes into your field.
Setting boundaries not just with time, but with attention and emotional availability. Leading your life from a full cup rather than running on empty.
When you reclaim sovereignty, you stop living in reaction to others’ demands and start magnetizing opportunities, relationships, and experiences that nourish you.
Practical steps to stop over-giving
Here’s how you can begin reclaiming your energy today:
Audit your energy: Where do you feel consistently drained? Which relationships, tasks, or habits leave you hollow instead of full?
Set boundaries with love: Saying “no” is really saying “yes” to your wellbeing. Boundaries are not rejection; they are containers that protect your light.
Redefine giving: True giving doesn’t mean depletion. It means offering from overflow, not obligation.
Monetize your peace: If you’re a professional, explore ways to share your wisdom without burning out in online courses, communities, or creative projects.
Prioritize self-restoration: Daily rituals, whether it’s journaling, meditation, or simply walking in nature, are not luxuries. They are your foundation.
Why I built the IF Wellbeing Hub
This awakening led me to create The IF Wellbeing Hub, a global online community where healing, reflection, and growth happen at your own pace, without draining your energy.
Inside the Hub, you’ll find self-paced courses such as:
The Art of Emotional Hygiene.
Managing Anxiety and Panic Attacks.
Healing Through Inner Child Work.
Resilience & Stress Management Tools.
Mindfulness & Hypnosis.
Community to support and cherish your wins.
It’s not just another program, it’s a space designed to help you reclaim your energy, reset your boundaries, and build emotional resilience. A place where transformation is affordable, accessible, and aligned with sovereignty.
The invitation
If you find yourself constantly giving without receiving, ask: Am I pouring from an empty cup?
Your well-being is not selfish; it is essential. Because when you are whole, nourished, and sovereign, the love and light you give to others flows effortlessly.
I invite you to join us inside The IF Wellbeing Hub.
And if you’d prefer one-to-one tailored guidance, you can always connect with me directly here, because you were never meant to burn out.
You were meant to shine sovereign, whole, and overflowing.
Read more from Hendrina Sterling Rodriguez
Hendrina Sterling Rodriguez, Trauma Alchemist & Voice Catalyst | Founder, The IF Wellbeing Hub & Mind Empower Therapy
Hendrina Sterling is a multi-certified therapist, transformational speaker, and the founder of Mind Empower Therapy. After delivering over 3500+ therapy sessions on BetterHelp and serving 10+ years in the NHS, she now supports clients globally with trauma-informed coaching, relationship repair, and emotional breakthroughs. Named “Online Therapist of the Year 2024/25” by Prestige Awards (UK), she blends psychology, hypnosis, and coaching to help individuals rise from burnout and rebuild from heartbreak. Her signature Phoenix Series™ speaks to the soul of healing.
