Written by: Karen Stallard, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Are you worried about the long-term effects of stress on your body? Start practising the seven activities listed below today, and your stress levels will reduce immediately.
Are these words familiar?
I need…
…to get out of here.
…a breath of fresh air.
…to let off steam.
…a cup of tea.
…to have more fun.
…to talk to someone.
These sentences are describing what your body needed in that moment to help you relieve stress, I hope you were able to act on your words!
A certain amount of stress felt in the body is an essential tool to help us perform better; leading to our heart rate becoming faster, a rush of adrenalin, and quicker reactions. However, it is harmful to stay in this heightened state of stress for long periods. Our bodies are programmed to automatically calm down after a stressful event, allowing the release of calming anti-inflammatory chemicals and encouraging quick recovery.
During the average busy workday, a person may experience several moments where their heart rate has escalated, their breathing is quicker, and they feel more alert. This change in the nervous system is healthy and normal, especially if the work involves an angry customer, a medical emergency, or a physical activity like climbing a ladder or driving through a busy city. However, we need to regulate; lower our heart rate and feel a sense of calmness in our body in-between the more stressful moments of our day. Thanks to exceptional scientists who research brain functioning, we are more aware of how the body works. So now we can put this knowledge to good use and practise self-regulation throughout the day.
Learning how to utilise the body's natural ability to regulate will help us fight inflammatory diseases such as arthritis, eczema, cancer and heart disease. It will also allow us to enjoy healthy relationships and live in the moment. No human is resilient to constant stress; it does, eventually, break us. Like someone climbing Everest, we have to manage stressful tasks slowly with many breaks. We can only endure a limited amount of stress without rest and recovery.
All of the above is not rocket science. Most of us will do the activities listed below without thinking; however, modern society can sometimes stop us from doing what we instinctively do if we were living in the wild. Understanding how the human body calms down will motivate us to take the appropriate action to aid it on its way. So, when the stress has reached a panicky or overwhelming level, try intentionally practising some of these activities.
1. Stop what you are doing and find a safe place.
Have you ever wondered why some children would lock themselves in the school toilets or hide under desks? Instinctively they went to the nearest safe place, probably without thinking. Thankfully, some schools now have rooms dedicated to this that are much nicer than the toilets, and some workplaces also have created spaces where people can retreat and sit in a comfy chair and take some time to regulate. When you feel too stressed, retreat to your safe place as soon as you can, it might be a cafe, a favourite armchair, or a park. Adults need safe places as much as children; find one at work, home or outside; the more you have, the better, as it can be impractical to have to go home to regulate. Some people feel safe in an empty place of worship; others feel safe in a busy supermarket.
2. Let yourself sigh.
Did you know that a sigh is your own body attempting to regulate itself? Breathing out longer than in will automatically slow the heart rate down. We sigh when we are stressed, and it is beneficial. It is also a helpful indicator that we might need to stop doing and spend more time focusing on sighing. If you want to develop this further, do some controlled breathing – make sure you breathe out longer than you breathe in. Try to practise taking mini-breaks in your day, go out for a breath of fresh air, and breathe for at least 3 minutes.
3. Shake out the trapped energy.
Stress produces actual energy in the body, and all power needs to flow! After experiencing significant stress, the body will often begin to shake to release the trapped energy into a flow state again; this is an automatic response. This is beneficial, but we often stop shaking because of social conformity. If you feel like you are trembling, then go somewhere and shake! Imagine a 100-meter runner waiting for the starting gun; that runner needs to be filled with energy to power them forward. However, if the gun never goes off, they cannot maintain that position. Stress releases into a flow by the athlete launching off the block. Our bodies do not like to hold a stressful position for long, yet people sit hunched over a laptop for hours, trying to meet their impossible targets. Traditionally communities, at the end of the day, might dance out the stress of everyday living with a unique tribal dance. We need to shake out the stress energy from our bodies somehow, so find a secluded place and shake off that stress after a hard day at work! Shaking out the stress energy is different from exercise; if you like to do sport to help combat stress, that is great, but shake first before running as pent up energy in your muscles can cause injury. Forget the social norms; shaking off the trapped energy could add years to your life.
4. Smell, taste, or listen to something good.
We often turn instinctively to food when stressed, but this can lead to overindulgence. Instead, be more aware and turn to something simple that will fill your senses with goodness and help you return to the present moment. Find an essential oil which evokes happy memories and keep it with you. If you like mints, buy a super strong mint and allow the flavour to give your body a sense of comfort, familiarity and taste. Sound is also an excellent regulator; listen to an audiobook with a calm and deep vagal tone. A calming voice will send the body into a more relaxed state; what is said doesn't matter, but the sound soothes. Our senses are valuable tools for assisting the body to feel safe by sending calming signals to the brain, thus relieving the stress and communicating all is well again in the world.
5. Hug yourself or someone else.
A firm safe hold around the body is one of the most significant ways to regulate. For some people, this is a challenge as touch may trigger past trauma or sensory overload. If this the case, just ask for a hand on the shoulder or hug yourself by wrapping your arms around your shoulders and holding for 20 seconds. However, if you are happy to be touched, then ask for a hug. A firm sideways hug is just as effective if a hug from the front feels too intimate. Notice how your body flops, and your heart rate slows as the hug hits the 20-second target.
6. Begin to play again.
Please read my previous article about play, and find something to do which enables you to lose track of time and has no real purpose. Happy children play regularly, and so do contented adults, but choose your play wisely. If you want a child to settle down and get ready for bed, don't chase them around the room; instead, you might cuddle them and play a gentle game. Know what you need and give yourself the chance to play in a way that helps you to expel that stress energy out of your body so you can relax. Remember that all of your body will be holding tension when stressed, so doing something low key like a crossword might be best. If you are a keen sportsperson a gentle swim or yoga class is ideal. We ultimately want the heart rate to slow down, not speed up!
7. Find an emotionally available adult and talk to them.
Talking about how we feel when stressed to someone emotionally available can be the most regulating experience. We are social beings and wired to feel most safe when we belong in our tribe.
Finding someone who will listen to us without judgment, who will not try and solve the problems but who will empathise with our predicament relieves stress immediately. If you do not have an emotionally available adult in your life, it might be an idea to start looking for a way to build more relationships with kind people who listen. Sadly, contemporary western society has seen a decrease in community gatherings, so it can be challenging to meet the right people, but keep persisting; they are out there. Alternatively, if you find it hard to open up and speak about your vulnerability and stress, find a good therapist who will help you unlock this essential tool for self-regulating. Many people find pets helpful for relieving stress. Stroking and talking to an animal can also release those calming chemicals into our over-stressed systems.
I hope these ideas help in your daily regulation of your nervous system. You don't need to spend a fortune on meditation classes or self-help books; your body already knows how to calm down, so go with it. Stepping out of the stress cycle to attend to your self-regulation can be the most challenging part; slowing down, calming down, and experiencing falling adrenaline levels may feel strange but is worth it for your health, happiness and relationships.
If you feel that your history of childhood trauma hinders your ability to self-regulate, get some good therapeutic help. We know so much more than we ever did about the effects of childhood trauma on the body; finding meaning and understanding can be so helpful for journeying towards a calmer place.
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Karen Stallard, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Karen Stallard began her career, having trained in performing arts, working in the theatre. She went on to pursue a spiritual path by training in theology, becoming an ordained Christian minister and working in the inner city for 20 years. Her work included promoting spiritual and cultural care within the British NHS medical system and spending time creating community activities for people experiencing mental distress. Karen went on to work as the minister at Union Chapel, Islington, an award-winning music venue for 8 years where she led the church to become one of the first in the UK to authorise same-sex marriages. Whilst working at Union Chapel she completed training as an Integrative Arts Psychotherapist and now runs a successful private practice. Karen is currently a trainer and supervisor for Trauma-Informed Schools UK and has also created and published a card game, "20 Dreams", a unique game of emotions that is designed specifically to engage the right hemisphere of the brain. Karen is also an artist, musician and beer brewer in her spare time and is passionate about external and internal liberation.
