Make Time For Love – A Bed In Could Save Your Relationship
Updated: Nov 12, 2024
Written by Angela Dawn, Sex, Love & Relationship Coach
Angela Dawn is a Certified Sex, Love & Relationship Coach and a Certified Tantric Sex Coach whose mission is to empower you to find fulfillment in love & life, enrich your intimate relationships. and help couples "Get Closer."
Much of my work as a Tantric Sex, Love & Relationship Coach revolves around guiding people to deepen their connections with others. I help people get closer. If you are curious about deepening your connection, planning dedicated time together is where you should begin. I suggest couples take a certain amount of “time out” for each other on a regular basis. (Learn more about my recommendations in this article.)
You might be rolling your eyes if you have a busy calendar, financial pressures, or a demanding job. However, I’d encourage you to think outside the box and contemplate how to book important alone time with your partner.
Introducing a new relational practice: the Bed In. I don’t mean like the John & Yoko political statement. We aren’t protesting wars here per se, but we are seeking relational peace! I’m talking about a new type of Bed In experience. This is when you and your partner block out a day (or two) to be together, at least mostly in bed. A Bed In allows you to spend quality time together – that doesn’t require travel or a big financial commitment – an intentional space where you actively focus on your relationship.
If you’re looking for a way to connect without the hassle or expense of going away for the weekend, a Bed In is a breath of fresh air. You can experience something special and intimate in your everyday space, transforming your bedroom into a sanctuary for connection for the weekend.
All you need is YOU (and your partner) and at least 24 hours set aside alone. My partner and I have a Bed In at least four times per year. Our rhythm is to have Friday night take out at my place, and then spend time together naked and (mostly) in bed until it’s time to shower and dress to go out to dinner on Saturday night. This gives us about 24 hours to be completely devoted to each other, present with each other, and enjoy each other. (We usually get back in bed after Saturday night’s dinner and stay there most of the day on Sunday, too!)
Why have a bed In?
Our society rewards effort, output & production
One of the most rebellious things we can do is to take time to rest. Because we need it. About one-third of adults in the US don’t get enough sleep. Sleep deficiency impacts our performance on the job, at school, and on the roads – and also impacts our ability to show up in our relationships. Resting together, intentionally, nurtures both our bodies and our connection.
There is power in slowing down
Doing a Bed In means making time for your most important relationship, and cultivating romantic connection. In a fast-paced world, a Bed In gives you and your partner permission to pause and reconnect on a foundational level—something many are craving but might not prioritize otherwise. Your romantic connection is something worth investing in!
Slow quality time nurtures our romantic and sexual relationships
Bed Ins create the perfect space for quality time with your partner. If you are spending quality time together, your relationship will improve. (The same is true for our relationship with ourselves – you can also do a Bed In solo!)
What happens at a bed in?
Whatever you want! Discuss the idea with your partner. You can include whatever activities you enjoy. Here are some ideas:
Read each other poetry in bed,
Stay naked for 24 hours,
Eat take-out in bed,
Hold each other,
Have deep conversations,
Make love,
Do a crossword puzzle together,
Sleep.
What do you need to do to prepare for a bed in?
Pre-determine your parameters
What’s the ideal length of time for you? Choose your dates and block them out on your calendars. (Ask the grandparents to take the kids that weekend!)
What activities will you enjoy doing? Brainstorm ideas together. Will you spend the whole time naked? Will you spend the entire time actually in bed?
Who will do what preparation? Decide who will set up the bedroom for the weekend and who will figure out the food or supplies.
Get your home/space ready
Create a tidy bedroom space. Clutter, like laundry, should be tucked away so the environment is distraction-free. Clean sheets are a must. If games or toys will be part of your weekend, have everything you’ll need handy in the bedroom.
Build a sex altar
A sex altar helps uplift your space and make the time together special. It’s also a simple way to have all of your sex toys and snacks at the ready! One of you can even create it as an Act of Service. (Check out my podcast on Sex Altars for more details on the ins and outs of how to make one!)
Prepare snacks
Or have a food delivery service ready on your phone, so you don’t have to leave the house to grab food. Have water bottles, wine, or your beverages of choice ready.
A Bed In isn’t just for couples! You can have a solo Bed In! Plan your activities. Try an extended self-pleasure session, listen to your favorite music, and hunker down with a good read. We ALL
deserve rest and pleasure! (This could be a fantastic practice for women to try on their Moon Cycle!)
Want guidance for your first bed in?
You can join a virtual Bed In! The Bed In Experience: A Guided Journey for Couples is a guided virtual couples retreat designed so you can slow down, reconnect, and immerse in each other’s presence—all from the comfort of your bed. I’m working with Melanie Bonk and Olivia Dydyna, to offer Zoom gatherings with expert-guided exercises and participant support.
Over the weekend, we’ll gather as a community and explore Tantra-based practices that nurture vulnerability, presence, and intimacy. By the end of The Bed In Experience, you will understand the power of intentional time together, discovering new tools for connection that transcend the weekend. You’ll walk away with a sense of renewal, feeling deeply seen by each other, and with a deeper understanding of what it means to be truly present in partnership.
Angela Dawn, Sex, Love & Relationship Coach
Angela (she/her) is a Certified Sex, Love & Relationship Coach and a Certified Tantric Sex Coach, dedicated to helping couples Get Closer. With a wealth of experience in yoga and Tibetan Buddhism, she brings a holistic approach to her coaching. Angela's mission is to empower clients to find fulfillment in love and life, free from societal taboos. Based in Annapolis, Maryland, her unique perspective and extensive training in tantric practices make her the ideal guide for enriching your intimate relationships. Don't wait; the time for the best version of yourself in love and intimacy is now!
