I'm Challenging The Statement The Universe Is Testing You

Written by: Leah Marmulla, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.

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Don't worry, the universe is testing you…

How many times have you heard this or a similar saying? I bet more times than you would like. You have decided to change direction; to say no to things you don't enjoy anymore, are not your greater life plan; say goodbye to your partner, friend, work, etc. You know the scene, you have decided, and now you just want to get on with it, and then...

The very thing, person, experience, offer, etc comes back and 'test you'. It feels like something is asking "Are you sure about that decision? Are you really, really sure you want to move away, give up, turn your back on XYZ?

This is what I would like to challenge with you the idea that it is the Universe is testing us, for me, it doesn't quite ring true. Please let me explain.

Firstly, we are all energy, our thoughts, feelings, and actions create a vibration that goes out into the world, sending a signal of what we want more of. The new choice, the newer way of feeling, being, doing, and having.

Second, the feelings, and vibe we lived at before the magical decision there were situations, unwritten agreements between you and the people you hung out with that had similar energy, beliefs goals, etc. Now that you are feeling and therefore vibing different the relational dynamics are different and new.

Thirdly, Newtonian Law of Motion states 'that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.' There will be a reaction from others, change in dynamics and challenges come up. You are starting to feel, think, be and do differently and others will react to this.

Newtonian's Law alone suggests the statement, "The Universe is testing you" is at best a quasi-inspirational quote and at worse an undermining trauma binding, guilt trip. What I propose is:

• Once the decision has been made, the person's emotional and therefore vibrational state changes, becoming more in alignment to the state required to create the new choice to come 'true'. Anything that doesn't match the new vibration creates a frictional discord. This feels like a rift, being unsettled, out of sorts; disagreements, or changes in relationship dynamics. The challenge now is to continue with the new feeling and staying true to the new decision, the emotion of the decision, the actions of the decision.

• There is a time of adjusting and up-leveling from the old you as you embody the decision, it is this stage that feels like a test, but it is only an adjustment phase. The stirring of the pot between the old and new. The familiar and unfamiliar, for the ego's need for familiarity and safety goes against the adventure of the unknown.

• Changes trigger memories of other times when change caused angst or rifts; it triggers fears of being the odd one in the tribe or worse being kicked out of the tribe – an innate fear that equates to death in our psyche.

What else is happening:

• Others are triggered! They want to keep you in the familiar, in their group, they don't want to lose you. What you represent to them, and there could be fear of being feeling or being shown up less than you.

• You are growing, something they may not have thought of doing, are scared of doing, have previously struggled with, etc. This new evolution and doing things differently can trigger thoughts, and fears of "You are moving on, what is wrong with me?" "Why aren't you staying with me and our shared thoughts, values, and decisions?" "What is wrong with what we have been doing? Why do you want to be, do, have different, NOW?"

Now, this is another part of the challenge. When you decided to be, do, have differently a part of you either had worked through these ideas and created counter steps; or your Soul gave you a brainstorm message of "Just do it!" to which you agreed to accept on the fly and act on it. Now, you have to create the game plan and work through the emotional, physical, and relationship discord as a result.

The next phase is to stay the course, but when people closest to you are not in agreement (alignment) it can feel like you are living an obstacle course challenge from Heaven or Hell. How to stay true to yourself when it feels everything is against you while you are morphing into the butterfly emerging from the cocoon?

1. Get clear with the end in mind. Tap into the bigger feel of where you are going, or at least the next step if the longer-term seems too foreign. Describe who you want to be, feel, interact with others, etc. Make it about feelings, and use items and events as the anchor for the feeling.

2. Consider who is in your current group you hang out with. Who your work and play with. What you listen to, read, interact with, etc. after all where we spend our focus is what expands. Is the news going to support your growth? Are your friends supportive, also open to growth and living their dreams? Can they support, encourage and motivate you to become who you choose to be? If not, expanding your circle of connection is invaluable.

3. How do you spend your time? Do you need to learn new skills, be exposed to different ideas, expand your awareness, insight, and experiences to expand who you are to become who you need to be? Listen to, read, and learn from inspirational and educational material prepared by those who have paved the way. Learn from the experts, soak it up, embody the ideas and personalize to your goal and purpose. Make it part of you, walk the talk and talk the walk.

4. Feel the resistance to change, and heal them. Resistance, fear, and a blatant NO! really are gold nuggets in the process of creating what you want. We learned at a very early age want was appropriate for us according to the family, society, race, gender, and class we were born and raised in. When we step beyond these, all the old rules of what we can't do, be, have come up to keep us safe and in the familiar. These parts are only doing their job, so go gently with yourself and explore the when, where, and why you took on the ideas of what you can and cannot do, then choose which you want to keep, delete or re-write.

5. Learn healing and shifting techniques that you can use when things come up. EFT is scientifically proven to change mind and body states, meditation and creative visualization, listen to subliminal or music at specific vibrational frequency.

6. Employ therapists to work with the subconscious programming and fears. Kinesiology, Reiki, Bars, Hypnotherapy, Meditation, Yoga, Pilates, Art therapy, Mirror work to name only a few of the broad range of change therapies available.

7. Use a variety of forwarding anchor techniques to keep you focused on what you are moving towards. Vision boards, daily affirmations, journaling, define and read out loud your perfect day, week, month, job, clients, experiences, etc. Daily gratitude for your future you emerging from under the rubble that has been hiding the potential that is becoming alive now.

8. Celebrate the smallest and biggest of wins towards your goal. People love to win, be acknowledged, etc., so celebrate yourself and watch yourself start to shine that little bit more.

9. See, feel, and become your truth. Believe in yourself and until you do, listen to those who believe in the greater parts of you that you can not yet see, or feel. Hang onto their coattails. Engage with a mentor, a trusted friend, others who are doing what you are asked to do, and become.

10. Accept the challenge with an open mind and heart. More we resist, strangely the voice becomes louder, the discomfort becomes greater, it can lead to illness and other problems that are not worth it. But this is another topic for another day.

As adults, it is our responsibility to create the life we choose to create. For sure, we can follow the dreams and expectations of others, if that is what we choose. No judgment is given. I challenge though, to become clear as to who's calling you are living up to. Is it yours, your parents, siblings, peers, boss', society' etc.? For it is when we own our choice, with an open heart that magic happens and our expansion is met with greater support. The Universe conspires with us, but in truth, the Universe is matching the new vibe we are putting into it. We are co-creating with the greatest force possible.

Now, the ultimate questions for you... Who do you want to be? What do you want to be known for? What do you want to experience from this time on?

Go now, and declare your true desires, do the inner work so your outer world is created on Your Terms.

Want to learn more from Leah? Follow her on Facebook, Instagram, Linkedin and visit her website.

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Leah Marmulla, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Leah has been to the dark side and back at least three times. It was during her last life attempt that triggered a deep realization. She recalls thinking, "If I'm not allowed to leave, then I need to work out how to live." With this realization, Leah deep-dived into her own shadow sides and now shares with others her passion — 'creating life on one's own terms.'

We all have a choice, but often we are so buried under other's expectations and rules we feel hopeless and disconnected. Growing out of the painful past, resulted in Leah authoring What the Mind Sees, the Body Feels, Creates and Attracts, and an Awareness and Accountability Journal of self-awareness, discovery, and manifestation towards the person the reader chooses to be and live from.