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How to Lead the Feminine Way Without Sacrificing Your Emotional Sensitivities

Written by: Star Hayward, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.

It’s no secret that female leadership is on the rise, as evidenced in just about every direction we look. Whether in social, political, business, environmental, or world affairs, women are carving their way into leadership positions on an exponential level.

Women entrepreneurship is also on the rise, as it continues to offer an accessible avenue to create, innovate, and excel on our own terms as women, and is a call into leadership in and of itself.


As a Business Coach, one of the most common traps I see women fall into when running their business is compromising their emotional sensitivities to be a “strong” leader. On the contrary, their confidence is buried under over-emotional sensitivity. They don’t feel capable or deserving of becoming the leader they need to elevate their business to a fulfilling achievement level.


Issues around compromise, deservedness, and capability root from various contributing factors that, for a woman entrepreneur, can hinder her ability to become anchored within as an empowered, feminine leader. Here are two examples that I’ve found to ring true for many women:


1. Societal Expectations in the Workforce: Women have been conditioned to shrink themselves to fit within patriarchal parameters and are required to meet masculine-oriented expectations to climb the ladder of success, to receive recognition, and to be valued. This causes self-minimizing and overcompensating behavior born of a feeling that deep down as a woman, she’ll never do or be enough to measure up, or that she has to be someone she’s not to succeed.

2. Parental Dynamics: Unless a woman was shown unyielding, unconditional love by her mother, and was cherished, adored and championed by her father (the combination of the two are rare) as a young girl she is highly susceptible to developing behavior patterns aimed at winning the love and approval she craves. This often results in women giving their power away in the attempt to fill those perceived holes.


In both of these scenarios, a woman will inevitably develop an imbalance in her divine feminine and divine masculine power. This may leave her feeling incomplete, inauthentic, and reaching for a false sense of confidence when faced with making difficult decisions and asking for what she wants. This can cause confusion, resistance, and unintentional sabotage that will repel the clients, opportunities, and resources she needs and desires.


Does this sound like you? It is no accident then that you came across this article because I believe with what you’ll learn here, and intention, you can move yourself and your business towards balance. When in balance, you have greater access to ease, flow, and an internal alignment that enables you to step into being a truly empowered feminine leader in your business and life!


Now let’s explore what divine feminine and divine masculine energy are and the qualities of each. With this distinction you can begin to grow an awareness around how they may or may not be showing up in your business.


The divine feminine is the Universal Oneness energy channel that runs through every human being. It is a magnetic energy ruling the heart, connection, intuition, abundance, servitude, emotions, unconditional love, and inspiration.


An example of a female leader in balance with her divine feminine energy is connected to the heart's pathway. Her past stories and future vision empower her and fill her with positive energy. She embodies unconditional love, she believes that everything is possible, and makes choices rooted in the better of the whole. She magnetizes clients, resources, and opportunities to her with ease. She uses her intuition as her inner navigation and takes action when she feels inspired. She knows the right thing to say and when to say it. She trusts in the divine flow of the universe and acts from a place where she already has love.


An example of a female leader out of balance with her divine feminine energy feels alone and unsupported. She is a victim of her past circumstances and is weighed down by blame, shame, and guilt. She uses confusion and self-pity to give herself permission not to act and to give up. She doesn’t trust in her ability to communicate what she really desires for herself and second-guesses her decisions. She often uses emotional manipulation and passive-aggressive behavior to get what she wants. She is trapped in creating scarcity, always wanting more and not having enough.


The opposing energy, the divine masculine, is the Universal Intelligence energy channel that runs through all of us. It’s an electric energy ruling the mind, intellect, information, knowledge, beliefs, concepts, systems, motivation, and action.


A female leader in balance with her divine masculine energy is confident in her knowledge to teach and guide. She has a keen intellect and uses practical problem solving to make quick decisions. She takes action, follows through on strategies, and thrives within systems. She is a confident leader and doesn’t hesitate to ask for the sale. Her team and clients look to her for counsel. She communicates with assuredness and doesn’t get hung up on emotional details. She acts from a place of already having everything that she wants.


An example of a female leader out of balancein her masculine energy will over-analyze everything, resulting in paralysis and inaction. She uses detachment as permission not to fully commit to her goals and working relationships and can easily walk away and “go it alone.” She’s judgmental of her competition and has a tendency towards elitism. She sees clients and revenue as something to acquire and will even use fear-based tactics to close sales, shaming people into buying.


Take notice in these examples where they speak to parts of yourself that either resonate with you or trigger you. This will give you information for what is in or out of balance in your divine feminine and divine masculine aspects. Follow these steps to connect with and break through what is holding you from standing fully in your power, and rising as a feminine leader in your business:


Identify


Out of the examples and qualities listed of the feminine and masculine energy channels above, what stands out that reflects what is working well for you and raises a feeling of resistance within you?


That which feels aligned and empowering is showing up in balance. That which feels like resistance or causes an emotional charge is indicating an imbalance. There’s no right or wrong, this is simply collecting data to help you become more self-aware.


Make a list of your findings, and take some time to journal what comes up for you in how your behaviors and choices are showing up in your business with these two questions in mind: where am I thriving? Where am I holding back, and why?


Explore


Now that you have more clarity on what’s in or out of balance in your feminine and masculine energy by identifying how your own behaviors and choices show up, follow the trail of what you listed or journaled back to the source.


Ask yourself these powerful questions and journal your answers: where were you displayed, taught, and represented, the behaviors and values that shaped your choices? What did you do or believe about yourself to emulate or compensate for what you were modeled? Who did you have to become, or what identity did you adopt in order to feel more loved, accepted, and valued?


Imagine


Our brains don’t know the difference between reality and imagination. Yet, it responds to what it perceives with an impulse that triggers a nervous system response that ultimately produces a feeling. We choose our actions and behaviors based on how we feel.


The next step is to visualize yourself as a whole, complete, confident, fulfilled, feminine leader. What does it feel like to be standing in this picture? What does your business and life look like as a result of your leadership, connected to your internal power source, creating and innovating with ease and flow, letting your intuition guide you, and feeling in harmony with your passion-led mission? (keep journaling!)


Choice


As a leader of your life and business, you get to choose who you want to be on any given day- no matter who you’ve been. So, what would it look like to choose a new identity for yourself, one that represents who you’re ready to become?


What new identity do you need to embody to bridge where you are currently to become the woman living in the visual above? Can you choose an identity rooted in abundance and limitlessness? What would you have to give up in order to do so? Describe yourself in your new identity and make this description your new daily declaration!


Support


Now it’s time to take inventory. What support do you need to help you break your glass ceiling? What resources do you have to lead your business to the next level and beyond? What resources do you need that will help you expand? Make a list of the resources you have and a list of the resources you need.


Words are powerful, and they hold a vibration that broadcasts a frequency that the universe responds to. As a powerful creator, you have the ability to literally speak things into your reality. How many times can you count that you’ve spoken something and it came true? Let’s apply this to attract some assistance.


With the list of resources you need, create a daily affirmation for each one, stated in the positive as if it has already manifested. Ex: “Unlimited resources are available to me to expand my team/run a marketing campaign/elevate my brand.” Affirmations only work if you say them, so the work for you to do is to speak these words consistently and frequently, so they become the object of your focus


Hopefully, by now, you have some clarity on what needs to be brought into balance in your feminine and masculine energy channels, the empowered identity you’re ready to embody to create and innovate from, and the resources you need to become the feminine leader you crave to be.


When you align your belief with your desire, anything is possible. You have to believe you can thrive as a feminine leader, that you can be in love with your business, and you will see it.


As an empowered and aligned feminine leader, your business is a channel to make all of your dreams come true on your own terms. I hope these insights support your pursuit of happiness, fulfillment, and abundance on your journey of heart-centered contribution and creating positive change. The world needs you, and you couldn’t be more deserving.


Follow Star on Facebook, Instagram, Clubhouse and visit her website.

Star Hayward, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Star Hayward is a Spiritual Business Coach, public speaker, and writer. She specializes in guiding visionary women to become confident, fulfilled, feminine leaders in their business through radical self-love, emotional mastery, and magnetic business strategy. She has over 20 years of combined experience as a healing practitioner, spiritual mentor, entrepreneur, and coach. Star incorporates her training as a Reiki Master-Teacher and Certified Integrative Wellness & Life Coach to create deep transformations for her clients and help them step into a new depth of leadership, expansion, and impact. Her business growth strategies are designed to align her client’s highest vision with products and services that will create a prospering, legacy brand and lasting ripple effect.

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