Help, My Stress Bucket is Full
Janette Klitou is a Solution-Focused Hypnotherapist and Psychotherapist exploring the fascinating connection between our thoughts, emotions, behaviours and unconscious patterns. She believes that change doesn't have to take forever, sometimes, a small shift in perspective can open the door to something completely new.
When stress keeps building, even small challenges can feel overwhelming. Janette Klitou explores how our thoughts shape anxiety and how hypnotherapy can help us move towards a calmer, preferred future.
Ever feel like your stress bucket is overflowing?
Perhaps it’s the smallest thing that finally tips you over the edge: a forgotten appointment, an email you don’t want to answer, or someone asking one more question when you’ve already had enough. It’s not really about that one thing. Your bucket was already full.
When stress builds up day after day, our ability to cope can become stretched. We may become more anxious, irritable or frustrated, and find it harder to think clearly and respond in the way we would like.
Our brain calls it ‘thinking’, our body experiences it as stress
When our bucket is full, even small things can feel overwhelming. We may find ourselves reacting with anger or anxiety rather than responding with the calm and perspective we would normally have. Our nervous system is under pressure, and it becomes harder to think clearly, make good choices and cope with whatever life throws our way.
How do our thoughts create anxiety?
Anxiety is often influenced by the way we think. It is not necessarily the events happening in our lives that make us anxious, but the meaning we give to those events and the thoughts we attach to them. It all starts with that one thought…
If circumstances alone were responsible for anxiety, then everyone experiencing a similar situation would feel anxious in the same way. But we know that this is not the case. Two people can face exactly the same situation and have completely different emotional responses. One may feel calm and confident, while the other may feel overwhelmed with worry. In the battle between emotion and logic, emotion always wins.
So, what makes the difference?
Often, it is our thought patterns. Negative thinking can fuel anxiety, particularly when we begin to predict a negative future. We imagine what might go wrong, and our minds respond as though that imagined outcome were a real possibility that needs to be dealt with right now.
Sometimes, the thought can be about something significant: ‘I’ll never get another job!’ At other times, it can be about something much smaller: ‘What if the meeting goes badly?’
The situation itself may not have happened yet, but the anxiety is already there. Our minds are remarkably powerful. When we vividly imagine a threatening or negative situation, our bodies can respond with genuine feelings of fear and anxiety. In this way, the mind can create a very real emotional response to something that exists only in our imagination. The more you place your attention on what that experience would feel like, the more your body begins to accept and believe it.
Understanding this is an important first step. We may not always be able to control what happens in our lives, but we can learn to recognise the thought we have about those events and, importantly, learn that not every thought deserves to be believed. What belief are you nervous to be vocal about?
So, how do we empty the bucket and create more space to cope with whatever life brings?
In this hectic world, many of us are searching for practical ways to move beyond stubborn patterns and issues that seem to keep us stuck. We need tools we can use in everyday life: ways of helping ourselves rather than simply waiting for things to change.
Hypnosis can help create the space to empty some of that bucket, calm the nervous system and reconnect with the part of the mind that can think, reflect and find solutions. The aim isn’t only to eliminate stress; it’s to increase our capacity to carry on when life gets too much, because we’re the only experts on our own lives.
One approach I use with my clients is the power of the ‘preferred future’. By shifting our attention away from the problem and towards the future we want to create, and focusing on where we want to go rather than continually analysing where we have been, we can begin to direct our thoughts, attention and behaviour towards solutions.
I know you are curious, are you not?
So take a moment, and imagine, how your life would change. If you could release stress, anxiety and anything else that no longer serves you, close your eyes, take a deep breath, and just imagine, how your life would be.
The more you place your attention on what that experience would feel like, sound like or even taste like, the more your body begins to accept it. Whatever you do…have some fun doing so…and now…you are a small step closer to your preferred future, are you not?
Just like that
Your brain starts processing the signal. You have given new instructions to your brain’s filter (Reticular Activating System, RAS), the Secretary (Anterior Cingulate Cortex, ACC) and the Boss (Prefrontal Cortex, PFC) simultaneously.
Your ‘Filter’ starts looking for signs that the desired future is already beginning… Are you ready to move towards your preferred future?
I believe that everyone holds the inner tools to heal; hypnotherapy is simply the key that unlocks them. Change doesn’t have to take forever.
Don’t wait for the bucket to overflow
Take a moment to think about your own stress bucket. What’s filling it right now? And what could you do today to let a little of that pressure out?
Sometimes, simply recognising what we are carrying can be the first step towards change. It might be creating a little more time for yourself, setting a healthy boundary, talking to someone you trust, or giving yourself permission to slow down.
If the bucket has been feeling full for some time, and you’re finding it difficult to empty it on your own, you don’t have to wait until you reach breaking point.
Hypnotherapy offers a gentle way to explore the patterns behind stress and anxiety, helping you develop a calmer relationship with your thoughts, feelings and everyday challenges.
Your bucket doesn’t have to overflow before you ask for support. Sometimes, taking care of yourself begins with making that decision and allowing yourself the space to explore how hypnotherapy might help. If you are curious about whether hypnotherapy could be helpful for you, a confidential conversation can be a simple first step.
Read more from Janette Klitou
Janette Klitou, Hypnotherapist & Psychotherapist
Janette Klitou is a Solution-Focused Hypnotherapist and Psychotherapist, with bachelor's and master's degrees in social work. Her work explores the connection between thoughts, emotions, behaviours and unconscious patterns, with a particular interest in mental health, neuroscience, emotional wellbeing, healing and human potential. She believes that change doesn't have to take forever and that even a small shift in perspective can open the door to new possibilities. Through her therapeutic work and writing, Janette is offering practical insights and encouraging curiosity about what might become possible when we begin to see ourselves and our lives differently.
