Grief Hits Us Physically As Well As Psychologically – Here’s Some Tips To Help
Updated: Nov 27, 2023
Written by: Sandy Linda, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
The rocky road of grief can take a big toll on our physical well-being. I've walked this path myself, especially after the devastating loss of my mother – an irreplaceable friend, a relentless advocate, and the cornerstone of our family.
The emotional storm felt like an unending hurricane, battering not only my heart but every fibre of my being.
The physical assaults were constant and always changing. I would swing between bouts of overindulgence and vanishing appetite; exhaustion and fretful, nervous energy. Even my skin began to reflect my internal turmoil. Patches of rashes emerged on my arms and legs, serving as painful reminders of the rough voyage I was navigating.
Psychologists Wolfgang and Margaret S. Strobe detailed a vast array of the physical symptoms people can feel after a loss. Their incredible book, Bereavement and Health: The Psychological and Physical Consequences of Partner Loss focuses on one type of grief, but it emphasises that, although there were many symptoms that repeatedly got mentioned, how every person physically feels grief is individual. Symptoms include fatigue, slowed thinking, loss of appetite, overeating, increased heart rate, and hyper-vigilance…the list is huge.
There are also short and long-term impacts. Neurologist Lisa M. Shulman has written extensively on how "...traumatic loss is perceived as a threat to survival and defaults to protective survival and defense mechanisms." It repeatedly sends our bodies into fight or flight mode, sparked by everything from a smell to a photograph. In a talk to the American Brain Foundation, she revealed that over time, this actually rewires the brain. She said: "When a circuit fires repeatedly, it's reinforced and becomes a default setting." Long-term grief changes how we think and function, from spatial awareness to vocabulary choice.
The impact of counseling and coaching through grief is well-documented, but I want to focus in this piece on whether you can mitigate these physical symptoms with physical activity. A paper in the journal Sports Medicine found that 22 types of physical activity helped with different forms of grief. The researchers tracked the impact of various activities like yoga, walking, running and martial arts. They concluded that "physical activity may provide benefits for the physical health and psychological well-being of those who have been bereaved, including when the loss has happened at a young age."
As someone who has navigated three losses in a short period of time, here's what helped me:
Walking in nature
Grief can weigh heavily on your heart and mind, often leading to the shadowy depths of depression. However, there is a ray of hope in the form of nature walks. Louise Delegran writes: "Exposure to nature not only makes you feel better emotionally, it contributes to your physical well-being…". Taking a leisurely 90-minute walk in a natural area, whether a forest or a serene park, is good for your body and mind. The soothing embrace of the natural world can quiet those repetitive, gloomy thoughts that often lead to despair.
Yoga: Channel your grief
Yoga can be a powerful tool for anyone dealing with the weight of grief and loss. While traditional yoga is widely known, there's another, more gentle variation called grief yoga.
This is a specialised form of yoga that focuses on helping individuals cope with and process their grief. It can help individuals release physical tension and emotional stress, promote relaxation and create a sense of inner peace during the grieving process. As Paul Denniston, “Founder of grief yoga,” states "The class focuses on healing a broken heart to bring us back to love instead of suffering."
Fitness centres or gyms
Going to the gym isn't just about working out; it's about being surrounded by people, friends, and a supportive community. Having friends who support your fitness goals is a secret weapon, especially during the difficult journey of grieving. Your exercise buddies are there for the workouts and to offer emotional support as you navigate the challenges of grief.
During my fitness journey, I decided to take a significant step forward by enlisting a personal trainer to assist me in enhancing my physical strength and shedding those grief-related pounds.
If you already have gym buddies, keep going, as it will help you. And if you don't, try and find somewhere you believe you will be supported, or find a friend who will start an exercise journey with you.
The path of grief is a tumultuous one that can profoundly affect our physical well-being. As someone who has personally navigated this journey, I understand the toll it takes on our bodies and minds. From the emotional storm within to the physical manifestations on our skin and overall health, grief leaves no aspect of our being untouched.
But amidst this tempest, there is hope and healing. Physical activities can mitigate the physical toll of grief. These practices offer solace, release, and a path to recovery for both the body and the mind.
Sandy Linda, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Sandy Linda is an elegant and worldly leader in grief guidance and a life coach. After experiencing multiple losses, she began a journey using her experiences to find calm in the chaos to support those mourning multiple losses. Sandy helps her clients move from heartbreaking losses to a place where they can work towards healing and become fearless adventure leaders.
