Written by: Ceza Ouzounian, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Do you know what you want in a relationship?
Do you know what you want in a partner?
When you are dating and looking for someone to settle down with, it is really important to get clear on what you actually want.
This is one of the first things I get my clients to do because you need to know what's important to you and what you desire in a relationship and partner.
We all have different needs and desires and getting clear on what those needs and desires are for you will make the dating process easier and more likely that you’ll find someone that is what you want.
Have a think: what qualities does your ideal partner have? What is their personality like? How do they behave? How are they towards you? How do they make you feel? How do you make them feel?
Then think about the relationship. What qualities does your ideal relationship have? What are those qualities that need to be there for you to be happy in that relationship? How do you feel being a part of that relationship? What is essential and needs to be present for that relationship to work?
When doing this work it is about you and no one else. It isn’t what your friends or parents or anyone else thinks is important for a relationship to work (of course you can listen to their thoughts) but ultimately this is about you and what qualities and needs have to be there for that relationship to be right for you.
What is important for one person, may not be important for another.
When you are clear on what is important to you then it is so much easier to weed out those relationships and dates who aren’t quite right for you (and that doesn’t mean the person isn’t nice but they might not be for you and this is about not settling for ‘ok’ when you can have ‘great’).
When you are clear in your vision of what you want, it means the universe can put into motion what needs to happen for that vision to become a reality.
It also means your subconscious is clear on what it is looking out for. If you meet someone who isn’t fulfilling what you desire, you’ll know sooner to walk away. It might also be that you get intuitive guidance to do one thing over another.
For example, when I did this work, I got the intuitive hit to join one online dating app over another, even though I didn’t really want to, but I went with that intuitive guidance, and the man who is now my fiancé was on there. If I hadn’t got clear on my vision of the ideal relationship and partner, I wouldn’t have got that intuitive guidance and I wouldn’t have met him.
Just like any other goal or intention in life, you need to know what you actually want.
However, you might find as you are doing this, resistances start to pop up. Those negative thoughts about how what you want isn’t the right thing to want, or how someone will react if you were in a relationship like that. It might be that you don’t believe you can find someone like that. It could be that you feel annoyed, upset or hopeless as you realise you should have found this by now, or that you will never find it.
Whatever negative comes up, keep a track of it. Notice when they pop up in your dating life. Notice how they affect how you feel and your behaviour. It will be these resistances that stop you from attracting your soulmate and ideal relationship. I’m not going to go into the resistances in this article but I wanted to mention them as often they pop up (which is great because then we can work on them).
This is a fun activity to do. It can involve daydreaming and visualising what is possible. It gives you the chance to imagine what that ideal relationship is like and feel good about the possibilities. Have fun with it.
If you feel stuck or have lots of resistance are coming up while doing this exercise, get in touch as I’m happy to have a chat.
Ceza Ouzounian, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Ceza Ouzounian is a Relationship Coach, an Energy Alignment Method Mentor, Fitness Instructor, best-selling author, and speaker. She helps successful entrepreneurial women have the relationship they desire. Ceza knows exactly what is required to have a relationship you love that is full of support, passion, and love and has helped many women reach their desired relationship. She shares the valuable lessons from her own journey and what she has learned from work with clients and those around her to support her clients to have their dream relationship.
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