From Conformity To Liberation – A Woman's Guide To Authenticity In Life And Career
- Brainz Magazine
- Sep 22, 2023
- 6 min read
Written by: Linda Martinez, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
In the world of work and business, women often find themselves caught in a web of societal expectations and conformity. The relentless pressure to meet the demands of both professional success and family responsibilities can become crushing. Many experience an overwhelming sense of emptiness, burnout and disconnection from their true selves as they try to juggle these roles. If this sounds familiar, know that you're not alone and that there is a path to liberation that can transform your life.
In this article, we'll explore four essential steps that will lead you to a life of authenticity and achievement that will not only liberate your authentic self, but also positively impact your work life and family dynamics.
The positive ripple effect
The most common concern of women who find themselves in a career that is not aligned with their authentic selves (or hiding their true talent and personality behind layers of conformity in the workplace) is that they will lose what they have built if they dare to change. But what you will find when you actually do it is that the positive effects will ripple through every aspect of your life. Your work life will be infused with new energy and purpose, leading to greater job satisfaction and innovative thinking. Your personal relationships will deepen, with greater communication, understanding and a deep sense of connection. Your family will witness the transformation of a happier, more fulfilled you, which can have a profound impact on their lives as well.
Self-awareness and assessment
The journey of your liberation begins with self-awareness. This is your opportunity to peel back the layers of societal conditioning and rediscover your true self. Think of this as a safe, introspective process where you can explore your desires, fears and aspirations without judgement. Seeking the support of a trusted friend, coach or therapist can be of great value on this journey. Many women are great at offering support to others, but shy away from seeking the help they need for themselves. This may be your first chance to actively break through the conditioning of having to do everything yourself.
Assess your current situation
What areas of your life need to change?
Why do you want this change?
How satisfied are you with your work and life at the moment?
What works well for you?
What doesn't?
Self-awareness practices such as mindfulness and journaling can be invaluable tools. Mindfulness allows you to connect with your intuition, body, thoughts and feelings, helping you to understand yourself better. Journaling provides a space for reflection where you can explore your deepest desires and the limiting beliefs that hold you back. As you reflect on this, you may discover that you have been in the wrong career all along-like me or my client Elli. We both moved from the medical field into coaching. Or you may realise that your career is already aligned for you, but you need to learn to set healthy boundaries and increase your self-esteem to really thrive in it, like my client Sandra did.
Vision
Once you have clarity about who you really are, it's time to reconnect with your vision. This vision isn't about conforming to societal expectations; it's about defining what success means to you on your own terms.
Imagine you have a blank canvas in front of you and you're free to paint your life however you want
What would you do?
What would you have?
How would your days unfold?
What would you remove from your life?
What do you need to become in order to manifest this vision?
Think of your vision as a powerful motivator that propels you towards a life in alignment with your authentic self. Embrace it, nurture it and let it guide your decisions and actions. Both Elli and I love serving people and helping them change their lives. But we both didn't like the constraints that came with working in clinics. Sandra loved working in her field, but she didn't feel valued and tended to overwork and exhaust herself. In both cases, our vision helped us to connect with what was right for us and motivated us to make the necessary changes.
Shifting limiting beliefs
As you reconnect with your vision, you will encounter the limiting beliefs that have kept you from pursuing it in the first place. Limiting beliefs are nothing more than the echo of societal conditioning in your subconscious mind. Your beliefs shape your actions, which create your results, which reinforce your beliefs. Changing your beliefs will change your results. To move closer to your vision, you need to change those beliefs. Beliefs can have different emotional expressions. The fear "I will lose what I have if I change" is just a belief dressed up in an emotion – fear. To create sustainable change you need to uncover and change your limiting beliefs. You can do this through journaling, mindfulness, meditation, affirmations or simply by observing your emotions. Every time you feel tense, anxious or contracted in any way, you can reverse engineer the beliefs that caused these emotions by asking yourself:
"What was I thinking right now that caused me to feel this way?” Once you have identified this limiting belief, reframe it by asking yourself:
"What do I want to believe instead?”
In this way you gradually shift a limiting mindset into an expansive one that serves your vision, mission and authentic self. In Elli's and my case, it was our conditioned thinking that we needed a 'proper' career to be successful and accepted that kept us in the medical field for too long. Sandra believed she had to carry other people's burdens and remain invisible in order to be worthy. In all cases, changing our limiting beliefs helped us to make lasting changes to our circumstances while feeling safe and supported.
Taking aligned action
As you shift your mindset to one that supports your vision, you then need to align your actions to create new results. Fortunately, once you have created clarity around your present and your vision, and shifted your limiting beliefs, aligned action becomes inevitable. You can either create a daily routine where you connect with your vision and from there ask yourself:
What can I do today to bring this vision closer to me?
Or you can continually ask yourself with every decision you make:
Will this move me closer to my vision or further away from it?
I recommend that you make a habit of doing both and then re-evaluate your results.
We've often learned to see results that don't match our intentions as failures. But your results are really just valuable feedback. Treat them as such. If your results don't match your vision, just check your mindset again. If they match your vision but don't feel like what you imagined, check whether your vision is really yours or still influenced by expectations of what it should be.
For example, I took a few detours into other areas before I was fully ready to start my coaching business. But instead of giving in to frustration and disappointment, I kept going and kept shifting my vision and mindset until it was truly aligned with what I wanted. The same is true, in one way or another, for every client I have worked with.
The liberation blueprint
The process I have outlined for you here is basically what I use to support my clients on their transformational journeys. It is tried and tested and works in any area of your life – not just work and business. It is fluid, as the steps are often intertwined. And it is sustainably transformative because as you consciously work the steps, you use them as a blueprint to rewire your nervous system. From here they become embodied and run on autopilot in the background of your life. You begin to live from the inside out instead of the other way around.
Authentic living is not a one-off event. It is a lifelong commitment and process that invites you to become the best version of yourself – every day. The reward is a life where you feel – perhaps for the first time ever – like you're in charge. You can be authentic and free and thrive in your career and personal life without sacrifice.
If you are interested in working with me or would like to explore my offerings and free content on liberating your mind, emotions and energy, please visit my website or follow me on Instagram.
Follow me on Instagram, and visit my website for more info!
Linda Martinez, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Linda Martinez is an intuitive Life Coach, Energy Healer, Artist, and Author, dedicated to guiding individuals on their journey of healing, transformation, and self-discovery. As 'The Flow Coach', Linda empowers her clients to heal their emotions, shed conditioning, and tap back into their authentic selves. With a profound understanding of the human spirit and a heart-centered approach, Linda creates a safe and supportive space for her clients to explore their inner world and unlock their true potential. Linda is dedicated to leading a movement of self-empowerment, consciousness, and transformation, guiding individuals towards living their most authentic, fulfilled, and vibrant lives.
