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Discipline – How Discipline Confines And Restricts You

Written by: Shayla Lam, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.

Executive Contributor Shayla Lam

I have been contemplating this word – ‘discipline’. Pondering about this word we have used to describe the concept of consistency to structure, a pattern, that would lead to ‘success’, ‘productivity’, a predetermined ‘result’. And often it feels rigid, restrictive, inflexible.

A 2 ladies and 1 child looking at their watches.

Recently this came up for one of my clients. She has been leaning back into her feminine energy, and for the first time exploring, being in this space. She has been operating mostly in masculine energy this past year to get things done, to build, to move. The success she’s had has been phenomenal, and she’s achieved milestones physically getting into great shape for her photoshoot to launch her business whilst working full-time. This year she was feeling more of ‘the pull’ energy rather than hyper-focused ‘push energy’. Life will have phases, seasons of push and pull. Lean forward and lean back energy. The transition between two can be challenging if we haven’t yet been familiar with how these come to play together and create a beautiful harmony. If for the first time, you are moving through this, doubts will show up, and you may question yourself, that’s ok. In this call, she had some doubts whether her ‘leaned back energy’ was ‘lazy’ even though it felt good. She said it felt good ‘being’, taking things slower this year. She said she was always about ‘self-discipline’, ‘when I tell my body to go, my body goes’, and had a structured routine, waking up at 4 am, followed by a structured routine, in the name of discipline. The transition between moving from masculine dominant energy to your divine feminine can feel a little confusing, and begin doubting; Whether you are lazy.

Whether you are not doing enough.

Whether you don’t care about your business, hitting goals, achieving constantly This is not true.

And so, I said to her;

This year, since leaning into this energy, and exploring the soft, feminine side of you; “I want you to replace the word discipline with another word...”

It’s helped me shaped my life, and hold me in all my endeavours towards my purpose; that word is;


That struck something immediately in her, and I could see the emotions, the feelings coming to surface, it landed.

Tears in her eyes…’ Shay! Just ONE word’... ”we can just get off this call now, done!

WOW!’ followed by laughter, the joy of a breakthrough.

It was her feminine side that needed to hear this. That needed to be validated.

Just as you are devoted to your partner not disciplined to your partner, just as you may be devoted as a Mother not disciplined to be a Mother.

The word ‘devotion’ stretches your meaning of the commitment you have to your purpose, your mission, your work, your relationships without the pressure, force, but with ease and effortlessness.

 Shayla Lam Brainz Magazine

Shayla Lam, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Shay Lam, Health & Transformational Coach is the Co-founder of Mind You Performance (MYP). Since what she calls the ‘re-birth’ moment, a pivotal moment that became the catalyst for transforming her whole life through freeing her mind, and unshackling herself from mental constructs and old paradigms, she discovered the ultimate freedom and unlocking the potential of human performance across what is now MYP’s methodology of Brain, Body and Balance. She runs MYP with her partner devoting her life to harnessing the potential in others so that each individual truly believes they are possible and fully live their life in their best Brain, Body and Balance.



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