Written by: Robin M. Wilson, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
“I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you.” — Psalm 32:8
Earlier this year, as I led my kindergarteners through our crowded school hallway, I had an epiphany. While we walked, I reminded them to keep their eyes on me and to move forward. To keep them safe, this is a daily reminder that I give. If their eyes are not on me, they will not know what direction to move in and they may bump into something that can hurt them.
On this particular day, however, I thought about my instructions to my young scholars as it relates to my life and my faith walk with the Lord. At that moment, it occurred to me that I had lost my focus — I had taken my eyes off the Lord.
This past year, I listened to speaking coaches, marketing gurus, and branding experts on how to move my business and career forward. There were organizations that I joined to network and grow professionally. While my business and network grew, I reached a point of burnout.
In addition to teaching and building my business, my time was consumed with preparing for speaking engagements, my book launch, and serving on boards. Needless to say, it was challenging to couple these responsibilities with my role as a wife, daughter, sister, and a friend; I knew that I needed balance.
My body was crying out for rest. Yet, I continued to push through tiredness in order to get things done. In February of this year, I had an ischemic stroke and I was hospitalized for three days. Thankfully, my speech returned quickly and I was able to resume my daily activities. However, instead of slowing down, I prayed to the Lord and asked Him to give me strength to accomplish the things that were on my to-do-list.
In retrospect, I can clearly see how God was trying to get my attention. Prayer and meditation on God’s Word is a part of self-care and I had made them less of a priority. I believe that God wanted me to slow down. However, when my body recovered, I was back on the go.
In our school hallway, I had a moment of clarity. As I instructed my scholars to keep their eyes on me to protect and guide them, I could sense that God wanted me to refocus my attention on Him to protect and guide me. It sounds simple. Yet, like walking in a crowded school hallway can be distracting to young scholars, walking through day to day life can be distracting for adults when there are many things vying for our attention.
For me, it was striving to be successful in my business, speaking, and teaching career— to the point where there was little room for consistent quiet time with the Lord and quality family time.
Instead, I spent more time reading professional publications, following influencers on social media, and listening to numerous podcasts and industry experts. While these things have their place and can be beneficial, these activities became distractions in my life because they were now coming before my prayer time and my time with my family.
As a result, I became anxious and stressed out because I was trying to be successful by doing the things that I learned from my circle of influence. They gave me useful information but I needed to shift my priorities. I needed to refocus my attention on faith and family.
When I did this, the anxiety and stress that came with trying to master everything on my schedule became less and less. First, I took a step back from some organizations and released responsibilities. Secondly, I started to say “no” more to people and opportunities, especially if their requests would add stress.
Now, it is becoming easier for me to reprioritize my schedule and to zero-in on the priorities that align with my values because I have taken time to reassess what and who needs to come first.
As the new year approaches, I continue to shift my priorities to faith, family, and field (F3) — in that exact order. Here are my declarations:
1. Faith (Matthew 6:33: "But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."):
In this season, I am making more room for peace. As I walk into a new year, I am committed to moving forward with my eyes firmly fixed on the Lord. While I do not know what tomorrow will bring, I believe that God’s plan for my life is perfect. One of my favorite Bible verses comes from Jeremiah 29:11. It reads: "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” I believe in God's promise.
2. Family (Proverbs 31:15-17: "She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks."):
In this season, I am making more room for quality family time. My family matters to me. They have supported me on my journey as an entrepreneur, teacher, and writer. God knows the desires of my heart and He knows what is best for me and my family. Therefore, I am committing to trust Him more with the details of my day as I prioritize my family while serving others in my business and in my classroom.
3. Field (Deuteronomy 28: 8: "The LORD will send a blessing on your barns and on everything you put your hand to. The LORD your God will bless you in the land he is giving you.")
In this season, I am making more room for the work that allows me to maintain my priorities. In my view, a field can be any sphere of influence that you occupy. I have influence in education, business, and literary circles, and I love the work that I do. Still, if I am not careful, my work can consume my time. My work matters to me and to my community, and I want my voice and skills to have a lasting impact.
What are your values and priorities? Are they aligned? What declarations and changes can you make to create more space for the things and the people who matter most to you? We all have things that compete for our attention and distraction is the thief of time. When our time is consumed with tasks or assignments that are not aligned with our values, it can drain us and cause us to lose precious time that could have been spent with people or on tasks that truly matter to us.
F3 helps me to reclaim balance in my life and to reduce stress. According to WebMD, some signs of high stress levels are depression, anxiety, irritability, restlessness, constant worry, digestive issues, and feelings of overwhelm. If you can identify with any of these symptoms, here are three tips to help you establish balance in your life:
1. Write down your top three values and priorities.
Carve out time to journal and list your top three values and priorities. You can easily determine your priorities by looking at your current schedule. What consumes the majority of your time. Is it business meetings? Social functions? Reflect on your schedule and be honest with yourself in making your assessment. Write down your three main priorities and compare them to your values list. If your lists match, there is a great chance that you have found a healthy balance. However, if your lists do not match, begin to think about ways that you can shift your priorities to better reflect your stated values. For example, think of the organizations that you belong to. If you have taken on a lot of responsibilities within these organizations, consider ways that you may be able to delegate or scale back on some tasks. This will help you create time in your schedule to rest or engage in activities with your family and friends. Small changes can make big differences.
2. Set boundaries for your time and energy.
When you have clearly established your values and priorities, it is important to set boundaries on your time and emotional resources. There will always be someone or something that can possibly distract you from your main focus. Thus, it is important to be mindful of your time. It is not selfish to set limits on your time. It is self-preservation. Earlier this year, I read “Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself” by Nedra Glover Tawwab, a licensed therapist and relationship expert. In her New York Times bestselling book, Nedra offers readers strategies to set and maintain healthy boundaries in every aspect of their lives. This book is a wonderful resource for anyone who is looking for ways to set healthy boundaries and to create room for more peace in their lives.
3. Create and activate your community.
One way to maintain your priorities is to identify and align yourself with people who share your values and who will support you in upholding your commitments. It is also a great idea to find an accountability partner—someone who you can trust and who can hold you accountable. This has actually helped me. This year, I was able to identify other business leaders who share my values and who have similar priorities. My business mentor and coach are successful women entrepreneurs who are Christians. Like me, they have a faith-based and profit-first mindset. Rather than demanding my time, they encourage me to maintain my priorities while partnering and networking with them.
We all need balance in our lives. It is important to our overall well-being. Balance also influences how effective we are in serving others. If our plates are stacked too high, the people who rely on us are not going to get the best of us. They are going to get the leftovers.
As a Christian woman who is a wife, daughter, sister, friend, teacher, business leader, and writer, I wear many hats. Still, I am learning how to pace myself and to prioritize my daily life in a way that truly honors my values.
There is a freedom and peace that can be found in fully trusting God with our lives. When we trust and fix our eyes on Him, He protects and guides us. In this season, I pray that you too can find balance, experience calm, and walk in peace. What matters most to you? When and how will you make more room for peace in your life?
Resources for the Christian Business Leaders:
A virtual morning prayer call and devotional time for Christian entrepreneurs
A book and podcast series for Christian entrepreneurs
A podcast for Christian entrepreneurs
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Robin M. Wilson, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Robin M. Wilson is the founder and CEO of Robin Wilson Educational Consulting LLC, where she combines her research knowledge and professional experience to guide nonprofit organizations in developing effective strategies for serving youth, especially young girls and women. With more than 10 years of experience working on literacy initiatives and in the nonprofit sector, Robin has worked directly with people from various cultural and ethnic backgrounds locally and abroad. She has trained youth and adults to become leaders and responsible citizens. Robin is a compassionate leader with a passion for uplifting and inspiring young people to lead and thrive.
References:
New International Version. Biblica, 2011. Bible Gateway, Psalm 32:8 NIV - I will instruct you and teach you in - Bible Gateway
New International Version. Biblica, 2011. Bible Gateway, Matthew 6:33 NIV - But seek first his kingdom and his - Bible Gateway
New International Version. Biblica, 2011. Bible Gateway, Proverbs 31:15-17 NIV - She gets up while it is still night; - Bible Gateway
New International Version. Biblica, 2011. Bible Gateway, Jeremiah 29:11 NIV - For I know the plans I have for you,” - Bible Gateway
New International Version. Biblica, 2011. Bible Gateway, Deuteronomy 28: 8 NIV - The LORD will send a blessing on your - Bible Gateway
Is My Stress Level Too High? Bhandari, Smitha, MD. Nov. 2020. WebMD. How Stress Levels Are Measured (webmd.com)
