Written by: Alejandro J Tornato, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
There is no question that for more than two years or so, people from all over the world have been living in very challenging times, and I want to bring a message to inspire, to motivate you; a powerful call to action to thrive in the middle of this or any other challenge we may be facing in the future.
Therefore, for most of us it is a great time to be stretching forward, because there is no better time than right now to start. When we consider this idea of stretching, we need to look at it from the perspective of going and moving toward something, (and that something could perhaps be a different place in our lives), or are we going to shrink and pull back and turning around looking at what is behind us instead of what is definitely ahead of us. It is very helpful to remind ourselves of a statement by Abraham Maslow (who developed the hierarchy of needs pyramid), he said: “we can either move forward into growth, or move backward into safety”. That is a personal choice, we cannot do both.
Also let me share a statement by jack canfield that says: “Everything that you want that you don’t have right now is because it’s outside of your comfort zone”, because if you wanted it badly enough and it was within your comfort zone you would go and get it with absolutely no problems; but guess what, if that thing that you want in your life is way outside of your comfort zone and you don’t have it yet is because you are not willing to step outside and do whatever it takes, to pay the price to obtain it. The global pandemic situation has for sure taken everyone outside of their comfort zones and there is no question about that. You can see it very vividly every day because most of us had to learn new things and work with new technologies; we learned to do virtual meetings, webinars, Facebook lives… We have suddenly become technology and computer zoom gurus, experts in the virtual world and that was quite a stretch for some of us.
As you keep reading through this article, I will share with you some stretch statements, but for right now I would like you to think of one word, and that word is “more”. Keep this word in your head for the reminder of our time together.
You see, I don’t know any of you reading this article right now, I never met you in person, so I don’t know your personal stories, nevertheless, I do know one thing about each of you, and that is the fact that you want more in your life. You want to have more than you currently have, you want to do more than you currently do, and you want to be more than you are right now. We want to have more impact in our communities and the world, we want to have more influence with the people in our teams.
This brings to mind “the law of the rubber band” from the 15 invaluable laws of growth book by John Maxwell.
This law states that “growth stops when you lose the tension between where you are and where you could be”.
Nobody buys a rubber band not to stretch it, its value is displayed when the band is stretched. A quote by William Somerset Maugham,
“Only a mediocre person is always at his best”.
Chris Hodges, a pastor of a large church, talks about “the vision gap” and that is the space between what you are doing and what you could do. This gap is definitely a stretch. People who are wishing to go back to the normal, or even to the new normal; let me share something with you, there is no new normal, it doesn’t exist. These people just want to go back to their comfort zones, and of course they are not exploring new alternatives, different ways of doing things, they are not stretching.
As an International Speaker inspiring a great many people and a leadership development coach, I talk and interact with lots of people, and most cannot wait to get back to normal or some sort of normality. The truth of the matter is that normal is no more, and those who want to get back to normal really want to step back into their zone of comfort and safety, and that is quite opposite from stretching and growing.
The first stretching statement I want to share with you is, The Growth Stretch.
1. The Growth Stretch
The phrase for this stretch is “there is a better way”. There is nothing that I am doing today that cannot be improved. As a speaker when I go back to a presentation I have given in the past, I always find new ways to improve it. For example today, I am giving my very best in sharing this content with all of you, but that is “today”, then tomorrow when I reflect on it, I know I will find new ways to improve it and make it better and more impactful.
In any crisis we may be experiencing we normally take detours, we need to take a different road, the normal speed has been reduced, there is an obstacle in the middle of the road, and the result is that we cannot get to the place we want fast without so many twists and turns, and that can be very frustrating to some of us. However, the answer to that is to take what I call the “detour tour”, and not only take it but to maximize it. You are going to see things you have never seen, experienced things you haven’t experienced, learned new things, tools, programs, apps and many other things that you haven’t learned before in your life, and if you have a positive attitude to these new experiences and learning, you will be much better as a result of it. Then, and only then the question you will be asking is “Why do I want to go back to normal?” – because I am finding a better way to do things. Who said that normal was the best way to do something?
I will share another quote by Abraham Maslow who said: “The most important learning lessons in my life came as a result of tragedies, crisis, deaths, trauma, these lessons came when we were forced (not willingly), forced to change, and our lives’ outlook became incredibly different.”
Maslow is teaching us a very important lesson in relation to this growth stretch that can be summarized in three areas:
Everyone can improve.
Everything can be improved.
Every day has improvement possibilities.
2. The Creative Stretch
What the creative stretch says is this: “There is always an answer. Perhaps more than one answer.” You see, one of the characteristics of an artistic, creative person, and part of their DNA is the fact that they know there are multiple answers out there, and they are constantly looking for them. Creative people have a relentless curiosity that keeps them moving all the time in search of answers and solutions to any problem or situation.
Creative people are life-long learners who refuse to quit exploring. These creative individuals have a bent and a passion to find the answer, and where are these answers to be found, always outside of the comfort zone.
There is a wonderful quote by Author Eric Hoffer that states:
“In times of change learners inherit the earth, while the learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists”.
So, the question for you and for me as we continue moving through this crisis is this: “What are we learning and doing right now that we didn’t know or did before this pandemic started? How are you changing? Are you grateful for this crisis? What are you doing on your detour tour that is helping you to grow and stretch creatively?”
3. The Intentional Stretch
This states that intentional living is the bridge that connects intentions and actions. Good intentions are overrated and this intentionality takes you from good intentions to good actions.
One of the things that a crisis does is that it moves us away from “automatic”. You see, another way to describe the dangerous comfort zone is “automatic” and people who spend most of their time in it live in “automatic”. We like to be in a zone where we don’t have to think much, things are mostly easy, where there are no challenges, where we don’t have to strategize, and where we just let life happens. As I was preparing this teaching, this is what I think automatic means:
Person who loves automatic loves easy, automatic is easy.
People in automatic will not initiate. They are not looking to start anything; as a matter of fact, if you start something you are out of automatic, out of your comfort zone.
People in automatic lack focus, you don’t need to focus because it’s automatic.
If you are in automatic you miss opportunities, why... because you are not looking for them.
If you are in automatic you are not open to change. Why would you want to go through the process of change?
If you are in automatic you will reduce your curiosity, why be curious, you may find something out there that you don’t know.
If you are in automatic you will not stretch, you lack the energy to go beyond your current capabilities and expand your potential.
Automatic is not contagious. I have never met anyone who sees another person inside their comfort zone and says, wow, I would like to be there myself.
The question now is “What would I take out of automatic to become more intentional right now?”
4. The Thinking Stretch
The greatest gap in life is the thinking gap. The way we think will determine what kind of life and experiences we are going to have.
Let me share a statement from the book “the magic of thinking big”, “capacity is a state of mind, how much we can do depends on how much we think we can do. When you really believe you can do more, your mind thinks creatively and shows you the way”.
I want you to start implementing these two kinds of thinking:
Shared Thinking And Sustained Thinking
What happens when you share your ideas with other people, of course, people you can trust? Better thinking is the result. Better ideas are born out of that interaction.
And when you maintain an idea in your mind for a certain time, and keep working the idea and reflecting upon it, you get sustained thinking which gives you deeper thinking.
Please, do not let other people’s negative, short sighted, scarcity, and full of fear kind of thinking invade your mind. Choose to reframe your situation and don’t ignore it.
5. The Perspective Stretch
There is no finish line. It is a big picture stretch.
How we view things is how we do things. We need to change our paradigm from “How long will this take?” to “How far can I go?”.
I will give you a few differences between these two statements:
"How long will this take?", is a finish line kind of mindset.
"How far can I go?", there is no finish line.
Most people have this question in their minds, “How long is this or any crisis going to last?”, and I believe there is an even greater and more important question to ask:
What are we doing right now so that when we get to the other side of the crisis we are much better for it, our businesses are stronger, better resourced, more creative?
I want you to remember that today ends at midnight, so what will you do today to stretch yourself to the new “you”, not the “new normal”. You can either stretch forward into growth, or shrink back into safety… You cannot do both, you have to make a choice, which one will it be!
Alejandro J Tornato, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Alejandro J Tornato is the Founder and CEO of "Alejandro J Tornato Global", offering Motivational Speaking, Leadership Coaching and Personal Growth & Development Training. Alejandro is a powerful and dynamic sought-after International Speaker and Coach Certified through The John Maxwell Team Organization. He is also one of the Founding Directors at "Have The Edge", with a mission to provide the most comprehensive coaching and training programs for business leaders and entrepreneurs. Alejandro's teachings and communication style immediately connect with individuals and groups from all backgrounds. Alejandro is the author of "Create Terrific Teams", and the host and producer of "The Alejandro Tornato Show" and "Have The Edge" Podcasts. Alejandro is a Top Mentor on Wisdom, the world's largest mentoring platform.
