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5 Ways To Start Treating Yourself Like A Queen – Self-Care Is Not Selfish

Written by: Chi Quita Mack, MSW, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.


I understand what it is like to juggle a career, side business, kids sports schedule, and trying to stay sexy for the hubby. By the time your day is over, you have nothing left to give yourself because you have just poured it into everyone else’s cup!

My favorite phrase used to be, “If only I had more time!”

Listen, sis! You have to make the time! Understand that if your tank is empty, that means you cannot be what you need to be for everyone else. Think of it like a car...Can your car run on “Empty”? I mean you could probably get like 50 more miles when that light comes on, but after are about to be pushing your car mad as ever because you passed like 10 gas stations, but didn’t have “time” to stop.

This is the same for your body! It has a way of “turning that gas light on” to let you know it’s time to fill up! I used to not participate in self-care because:

  • I did not think I was worthy.

  • I thought that as a mother, your job was to ONLY pour into your motherhood duties.

  • I felt guilty.

Listen Beautiful, do not feel guilty for doing whatever you feel you need to do that is necessary to function and get your mind together!

Let’s get started:

1. Learn to say “No”! - It’s ok to focus on YOU! The most important word you will ever learn! Stop feeling guilty for setting boundaries! It is important to recognize when you are in need of a break. Trust me when I say these two simple letters will have the greatest impact in your self-discovery process.

2. Splurge- Yes, Treat yourself! How many times have you gone to the store and realized you have bought everyone something EXCEPT yourself! Really? OR you buy yourself those nice pair of heels and you immediately feel GUILTY! I know, I know! Listen, you deserve nice things too! Invest in yourself, take care of yourself! It’s time to love yourself!

3. Clear out the Clutter...and I don’t mean just “STUFF”- Yup! I said it! Clutter is not always “STUFF”. Sometimes it’s people too! Your environment...the people around play a huge part in your ability to be successful, rest, and have peace! Not everyone is meant to go on your journey! If they no longer fit your space...Let them go! You control your peace and happiness.

4. Self-Reflection: PAUSE- That’s it...Just Pause! Sometimes we have to just stop to realize where we have been, where we are going, and where we are headed! Slow down! Enjoy the moment!

5. Spend 30 minutes on your favorite activity or Try Something New- Sometimes we get so wrapped up in our day to day! Get back to those things you used to enjoy! It's ok to smile and enjoy you! Better yet, get adventurous and try one thing that you have always wanted to do!

This will definitely be a game changer!

You are worthy, You are beautiful, and You are deserving!

If you are interested in continuing your journey, I encourage you to check out My FREE 30-Day Self-Care Challenge.

Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, and visit my website for more info!


Chi Quita Mack, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Meet Chi Quita Mack, MSW: A Major in the United States Army, Social Worker, Author, Life Coach, wife, and mother of 3. She currently holds a Master of Social Work from Our Lady of the Lake University, a Bachelor of Science in Biology with a minor in Military Science from West Virginia State University-Historically Black Colleges and Universities (HBCU).

Chi Quita is the founder and CEO of The Chi Quita Mack, LLC, a safe place she created for all women to come relax, get empowered, and be constantly reminded they have not lost the ability to be who they once were. Chi Quita reminds women that they are more than just mommies and with a positive mindset, attitude, and motivation all those dreams that were set aside can come true.

Chi Quita just released her workbook called “The Beauty in You: A Guide Created To Help You Discover The Best Version of You."



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