3 Lies That Keep Leaders Stuck In Imposter Syndrome
- Nov 5, 2024
- 6 min read
Maurice F. Martin, a dynamic 2x bestselling author, transformational speaker, and coach, is forging an influential journey in personal development and leadership. Once an award-winning singer and co-host of the TV show "Getting The Word Out," Maurice is now the host of the Hope Rising Podcast.
Have you ever looked around at your accomplishments only to feel like a fraud waiting to be exposed? Maybe you've brushed off praise, thinking you just got lucky. Maybe you've started to wonder if you truly belong in the room. Keep reading to uncover the three lies that might be keeping you stuck in imposter syndrome and how to break free from them.
I lay in bed with tears filling my eyes. As a tear began to fall down my face, I angrily wiped it away. Maybe you’ve been there in life, frustrated about being frustrated. I was sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.
“There has to be more than this,” I thought to myself. I couldn’t figure out what was missing from my life. My life story sounded like something other people dream of as an Award-winning singer. Co-writing songs with Grammy winners. Creating with Emmy winners. National licensing TV deals with my music.
Yet, here I was, feeling empty.
Lie 1: You need to fake it ‘til you make it
“Fake it ‘til you make it.” How many times in your life have you heard those words? Just pretend to feel something until you reach your destination. It will work, right? Wrong.
Instead, you fake your feelings and reach your destination only to feel more fake.
Here’s what I know about you. You, my friend, are worth believing in. You are full of talent, potential, and gifts that the world needs. I’m not talking about what you can be some magical, mythical day in the future. Now. Right now. You are already that individual. You are worth believing in.
Believing in who you are and what you bring to the table is the exact opposite of faking it until you make it. Throw “fake it ‘til you make it” out the door and embrace “believe it ‘til you achieve it.”
Don’t get me wrong, and I understand the heart behind “fake it ’til you make it.” The lesson tells us that if we just get into the process and stick to it, eventually, we will embody those thoughts and beliefs. The problem, however, is that it rarely happens.
As a transformational coach and a chemical dependency counselor, I’ve sat down with countless clients over the last few years who faked it, accomplished the great achievement they were shooting for, and then self-sabotaged once they achieved it. Why?
Here’s the secret: Once you reach new heights, you must have a new level of belief and character to maintain and sustain that new level of accomplishment.
Maybe I said that in too complicated a way. I’ll say it differently: The you of today is full of potential and promise. You must believe in yourself today and then lean all the way into personal development. As you work towards the next goal, you must also be working towards the next version of you.
That “lean in” are you leaning into personal development, authenticity, character, and integrity. The difference between that process and faking it until you make it is a difference in intentionality.
Faking it ‘til you make it has you intentionally deceiving yourself with the hopes that someday you’ll believe the deception.
Believing it ‘til you achieve it has you intentionally believing in yourself with the understanding that in life, we must plant seeds of faith and then water those seeds through intentional learning, living, and cultivation.
One is based on luck. The other is based on focus, intention, and faith.
Remember that you will perfect whatever you practice. Don’t practice being fake. Practice believing in the power that you have inside of you! Overcoming imposter syndrome requires more than just pretending; it demands that you confront your insecurities and believe in your true potential.
Lie 2: Excellence requires perfection
Excellence doesn't demand that you be perfect. It demands that you be authentic, resilient, and relentless in your pursuit of growth. So, stop holding yourself to an impossible standard. Aim for excellence, not perfection. Because excellence, my friend, is what truly makes you stand out.
I get it; it’s a common belief in our world that excellence and perfection are one and the same. But I’m here to tell you that couldn’t be further from the truth. Perfection is defined as "the condition, state, or quality of being free or as free as possible from all flaws or defects." Excellence, on the other hand, is defined as the quality of being outstanding or extremely good.
One of these definitions does not allow for imperfections; the other simply looks at the final outcome and celebrates what is outstanding within it. Look around you. Do you see any perfect people? Looking in the mirror, is a perfect person looking back at you? When you pursue perfection, you push yourself, your work, and your team to rise to the occasion without flaws or imperfections. But here’s the catch: the pursuit of excellence forces you to face those flaws, overcome them, and grow through the process. This journey includes both success and failure.
It is often our struggles that build our character, strengthen our resolve, and mature us into the people we were born to become. If you, as a leader, are finding yourself trying to be perfect, you’re likely hitting walls that leave you feeling not good enough, not strong enough. And sometimes, those walls make you want to give up and give in.
But remember, the key to dealing with imposter syndrome at work isn't about reaching some unattainable level of perfection. It’s about embracing your imperfections and using them as stepping stones to greatness. The most effective leaders aren’t perfect. They’re resilient. They understand that failure is not the opposite of success but a part of it.
So, aim for excellence, not perfection. Because excellence, my friend, is what truly makes you stand out. In the professional world, it’s not perfection that earns you respect but your commitment to growth and your resilience in the face of challenges.
Lie 3: You must always be in control
I recently sat in an executive coaching session with one of my clients and the CEO of his company. I wish I could say that the most profound thing said was by me, but it was actually the CEO who delivered the wisdom. He looked at his employee and said, "People are watching you, and they aren't going to stop watching. Don't let them watch an act; make them watch you win."
Make them watch you win. Just think about that.
We live in a world where we love to give off an air that we always have figured out and are always in control. But think for a moment about your favorite movies, your favorite stories, or your favorite heroes. Most of us love to overcome the person who rises from the ashes to win the greatest victories. It's Michael Jordan being cut from his high school team only to eventually rise to stardom. It's the Rocky Balboa story of being overlooked yet rising to greatness.
As a leader, I want you to know that the people you lead are not dumb. They are often much smarter than you think, and they know when you’re "off." They know when you struggle. Sometimes, the greatest leader isn’t the one who pretends to have it all figured out. The greatest leader is the one who can say, "This is hard. I don’t have all the answers, but we will rise above this."
The leader who is vulnerable enough to acknowledge the answers they don’t have and the control they don’t possess yet stays in control of their character and perseveres until they lead the team to the next level. That’s the leader who earns respect and loyalty. True leadership isn’t about always being in control; it’s about being adaptable, open, and authentic in the face of challenges. It’s about showing your team that you don’t need to have all the answers to lead them to victory. Instead, it’s your resilience, your integrity, and your willingness to navigate uncertainty that will inspire them to follow you, no matter the obstacles.
Understanding this balance is key to overcoming imposter syndrome at work, where the pressure to appear always in control can lead to burnout and a lack of genuine connection with your team.
Moving forward
Overcoming imposter syndrome isn't a one-time event; it’s a journey that requires continual growth, belief in your own potential, and a commitment to authenticity. You don’t have to walk this path alone. If you’re ready to set clear intentions and would benefit from professional accountability to keep you moving forward, reach out to me. Together, we can work to bring out your strengths, establish goals aligned with your values, and ensure you lead with confidence and clarity. Your potential is waiting. Take that next step today.
Maurice F. Martin, Transformational Coach and Speaker
Maurice F. Martin, a dynamic 2x bestselling author, transformational speaker, and coach, is forging an influential journey in personal development and leadership. Once an award-winning singer and co-host of the TV show "Getting The Word Out," Maurice is now the host of the Hope Rising Podcast. His second book, "Your But Is Too Big," was the number 1 New Release in Christian Counseling and Christian Faith. Grounded in an unwavering commitment to authenticity, Maurice empowers leaders to uncover their spark, harmonize their lives, and overcome imposter syndrome.
