Written by: Emily Cleghorn, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
“Stop doubting yourself and looking outside of yourself. Quiet your mind, ask for guidance and listen to what comes. All of the answers are within you. Never doubt that.”
Did your childhood leave you with an empty feeling in your gut? Like something was missing; however, you are unsure what exactly it is. Or maybe your childhood left you with some pretty big scars that you are searching for that one thing that will make the pain go away.
Perhaps, you have spent years of your life searching for that thing that will make you feel better something that will heal all the hurts of your past?
I spent many years searching for this exact thing. My childhood left me with many pretty big scars. I spent many years searching to discover that one thing that would make them stop hurting.
I turned to food to fill the void ‒ the pain persisted.
Retail therapy ‒ the pain persisted.
Alcohol ‒ the pain persisted.
Television ‒ the pain persisted.
Counseling more than once with different professionals. We dug up the events again and again the pain persisted.
Can you relate to this experience?
Do you know what all these things have in common?
They often help you numb out and cause more struggle. Each of these coping mechanisms is external to yourself. They allow you to disconnect from your inner knowledge further.
In all honesty, while they offer temporary relief, they do not help you find what you are searching for to fill the void you are feeling in your gut.
Reason no 1. You are looking in the wrong place
Someone or something telling you how you feel or what you should do about it. However, the truth is, ONLY YOU know what you are feeling deep down and what you should do about it.
When was the last time you got quiet and listened to what your gut is guiding you to do about a situation?
Our society has trained us that our inner knowledge is not to be trusted. However, what we tend to find when we go inward is that we often know precisely how to solve a problem we are encountering- no matter the size of the challenge.
Reason no 2. Disconnection with your Inner Self
In Western society, we are taught, as children, very early on, how to numb our emotions. We are taught that certain emotions are unproductive; feeling or expressing these emotions is unacceptable.
This teaching leads us to hold emotions like: sadness, anger, and grief in and push them down or numb ourselves to the point that we cannot feel any longer.
There are a few problems with this. First, your emotions are stored in your bodily tissues and organ systems and can eventually end up causing disease. Secondly, numbing out emotions like sadness, anger, and grief means that we are hindering our ability to know how to handle them or even be able to identify them, which creates a situation very much like walking with a blindfold.
You need to understand that every reaction and feeling you have in response to your trauma is okay. This article on helpguide.org provides more helpful information for you to reference.
Conclusion
Stop searching outside of yourself for answers that only exist within you. Learn how to identify your own emotions. Listen to your internal knowledge- it just might surprise you.
If you are looking for the step-by-step process of realigning with yourself, click here to get your complimentary copy of my ebook Break the Chains: 5 Keys to Break the Chains your Childhood Trauma put you in and Step into your Empowered Mamahood
Emily Cleghorn, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Emily Cleghorn is a Life Reclamation coach, Amazon best-selling author, and keynote speaker with a heart to help her clients to rise from the ashes of their past trauma and step into their mamahood with fierceness and confidence. Having been on her own healing journey, Emily is able to hold a space for her clients that helps them feel accepted fully as who they are and held accountable so that they are able to create the change they are craving in their lives. In her book, “Rising from the Ashes: How to Reclaim your Life after a Traumatic Childhood”, Emily outlines her framework for overcoming childhood trauma and teaches readers how to break the chain holding them back and step into their purpose.
