The Identity of Clutter

Written by: Jesi Carroll, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.

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We’ve all heard the concept that if you have a messy home, you have a messy mind.

We’re aware that the clutter around us can have us feeling a little chaotic internally.

But it goes so much deeper than a slightly uncomfortable, seemingly temporary mood.

It’s crucial that we look at the state of our homes and unravel what it’s really saying to us.

Because if we don’t, we’re not only missing the opportunity to get to know ourselves more deeply but the full potential of the true healing we’re capable of.

We’re missing the opportunity to experience bliss internally and externally at the same time, which creates an incredible life experience.

When we pause, look around, and evaluate our environment, level of cleanliness, and amount of stuff, we start to see the truth of who we are. We start to see what’s really going on in our minds and uncover the real way we’ve been viewing ourselves, whether we like what we see or not. When we tap into our homes, we radically face ourselves and with no one else to blame because it’s ours.

You see, our stuff (regardless of how much or how little we have of it) is not about the stuff at all. It is the symbol for the experiences, memories, characteristics, and even people the stuff represents.

As we collect, we associate to the moment we received the item or the people we were with when it came to our possession. Suddenly that thing has more meaning associated with it, and it feels like more than just a thing.

Over time, it becomes our identity. We become so tied to the stuff we own that it can feel impossible to let it go. So we don’t. We continuously find reasons to keep it around and allow it to clutter not only our homes but the energy within them.

It can feel that by letting go, we’re actually releasing someone from our lives. It can feel like we’re telling the Universe we suddenly (and almost for no reason) don’t care about the person/memory/experience we’re subconsciously associating with. And that’s painful. We feel guilty and tell ourselves letting go of something would make us a bad person or hurt someone’s feelings.

The fears of change, letting go, acceptance of the new beginnings, and rejection (among other things) pop up fast at the thought of release.

But when we find our homes piling up with messes left and right (or maybe minimalism is your jam), it’s saying to you that you’re either heavily attached to or heavily avoidant of something.

It’s unhealthy and controlling how you show up in the world.

When we can bring some consciousness to our unconsciously created habitual environment, we can unravel some powerful information. We can begin to understand what’s keeping us stuck or what’s missing from our lives. We can begin to connect dots and finally see what our patterns are. Only once we observe and become aware of how we’ve been going about our lives (and keeping our homes). We can make any significant change in the direction we desire.

But once we commit to observing and making changes, then we can live better and heal faster. The cool thing about personal development through design is that we’re getting to see our growth tangibly and how far we’ve come.

Often, personal development can feel like a process that leads to nowhere since we have to trust the benefits and rewards are on the way with no physical proof it’s happening and no timeline of when it will all show up.

But with design, we get instant gratification. We can see the difference between an uncluttered, organized home. We understand the immediate effects of how the changed space makes us feel. It’s motivating and exciting. It feels good and trustworthy. The participation feels worth it. We’re interested in sticking with it.

And is why it is so rewarding to guide clients through this process. Helping them reconnect to their homes while simultaneously reconnecting back to themselves. Showing them that their homes are just a reflection of their inner state and that mirror can reflect whatever they desire. They need to decide what they want to see.

When I work with clients, I guide them through the detachment process, help them dive into the cluttered mess that tends to land in the same spots continuously, discuss the real fears experienced due to perfectionist tendencies that bleed into every area when not dealt with, discuss the toxic people-pleasing that comes into play when decorating for others and not themselves, and so much more.

I help them see and digest what reflection is occurring.

And when we go beyond the surface like that, a whole world of healing possibilities becomes available.

This kind of digging is not always the easiest alone. Sometimes it takes working with a guide and mentor to help you see the blind spots you’ve been missing.

But I promise that when you commit to building a new relationship with yourself and your environment, it will be the most rewarding work you’ve ever done.

Follow Jesi on Facebook, Instagram, Linkedin and visit her website.

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Jesi Carroll, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Jesi Carroll, Life Design Coach, is a certified Interior Designer and Mindset Coach who can show you how to Re-design your life (AND home) in the way you're worthy of. She specializes in taking her clients from decorating overwhelm and debilitating people-pleasing and perfectionism to relief at home and in life. She believes that design is a mirror that can reflect our inner world back to us. When leveraged properly, it can be life-changing and allow us to dive deep into the subconscious to truly heal. This tool is available to all of us, and she is here to show you how to harness it!

Jesi offers virtual interior design, 1on1 life coaching, and an in-depth, immersive experience combining the two worlds of design and coaching. She believes it's time to heal at the soul level and to do so through fun, unique, and non-intimidating modalities.