The Five Element Roadmap to a Peaceful Home

Written by Arlana Tanner-Sibelle, Interspecies Connection & Wellness Coach l Author

Certified Holistic Animal Wellness and Behavior Consultant, Speaker, Facilitator, Intuitive and author of Moving Beyond Words. She blends Five-Element insight with holistic wellness tools to help guardians create calmer, healthier relationships with their companions.

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There’s a generally unnoticed conversation happening in your home that goes beyond behavior, a rhythm of pacing or unrest, a quiet yet focused attention, or tiny signals that tell you how your animal companion is feeling. Behavior is often seen as an issue, not as a type of conversation. When we treat behavior as a problem to fix, instead of a language to read, confusion and frustration grow. When we don’t respond to their needs, behaviors escalate.

There is a practical, proven practice that has been used to create harmony and understanding between companions for centuries. Elemental Wisdom gives you a simple, practical roadmap, using the magic of the five elements (earth, water, fire, air, metal), to understand temperament, reduce stress, increase understanding, and address health concerns, practical results are accessed by applying small daily rituals that create calmer, healthier, more harmonious relationships for people and pets alike.

Below, I outline how each element is expressed in ourselves and in our animal companions, with a single “try tonight” strategy you can use immediately, and a short 7-day micro plan to begin changing patterns in a way that creates the foundation of lasting change.

What the five elements reveal about us

Each element profile describes a flow of energy and deep-seated desires. They’re not boxes we need to fit in, think of them as fingerprints, unique to each of us. While we may exhibit all of them in some way, there is usually one or more that are prominent. When we are together, we exhibit individual traits, but both energies are at play. Understanding this and providing our animal companion with what they desire is the first step in a new way of understanding and connection.

• Earth: Steady, security-seeking, routine-loving. Calms with predictability.

• Water: Sensitive, deep, prefers low stimulation and gentle touch.

• Fire: Bold, social, energised by interaction and play.

• Air: Curious, quick, thrives on novelty and mental stimulation.

• Metal: Orderly, focused, prefers clear cues and tidy routines.
  

When you know which element is dominant in your animal companion, you can choose strategies that match that energy, matches their personality, to create harmony not fight against it. Which of these feels more in alignment, with your animal companion? How are you the same, how are you different?

Element-based practical actions

Earth: Steady & Safe

How it shows: Slow to warm, loves routine, uncomfortable with sudden change.

Try tonight: A calm, predictable 10-minute evening routine, same walk route, same order of activities, soft lighting. No surprises. 7-day micro-plan:

1. Same morning/meal/walk times every day.

2. One 5-minute slow massage or brushing session before bed.

3. Reduce late-night stimulation (no high-energy play after dinner).

Water: Sensitive & soulful

How it shows: Startles easily, withdraws when overwhelmed, benefits from quiet.

Try tonight. Dim the lights, play low-volume calming music, and offer 5 minutes of slow, reassuring touch in a quiet corner before bedtime. 7-day micro-plan:

1. Two 5-10 minute calm sessions daily (massage, soft petting).

2. Avoid loud or chaotic environments for short windows each day.

3. Introduce one predictable comforting cue (a soft phrase or scent) before rest.

Fire: Bold & social

How it shows: Seeks interaction, loves attention, brightens with people and play. Behavior can escalate if bored.

Try tonight: 10 minutes of focused, high-quality play (fetch, chase-toy, or guided zoomies) then a slow-down cuddle. 7-day micro-plan:

1. Two short play bursts each day (5-12 minutes) that expend energy.

2. One calm re-entry ritual after play (settle + treat + quiet praise).

3. Teach or reinforce one short cue (sit/settle) to anchor excitement.

   
   

Air: Curious & quick

How it shows: Easily distracted, curious, often seeks novelty or mental puzzles.

Try tonight. Give a simple food puzzle or hide a few treats in a box to engage focus for 5-8 minutes. 7-day micro-plan:

1. Rotate one new mental activity every 2 days (puzzle feeder, scent games).

2. Short walk with alternating sniff/pace flags to channel curiosity.

3. End one session daily with a slow, predictable cool-down.

Metal: Orderly & precise

How it shows: Prefers rules, responds to structure, may show frustration when things are messy or unpredictable. Try tonight: A 7-minute short training session using clear cues and consistent rewards, keep it tidy and predictable. 7-day micro-plan:

1. Consistent feeding & cue schedule (same times, same commands).

2. One 5-10 minute training session daily focusing on a single cue.

3. A tidy, dedicated rest space that is always set up the same way.

What energy stood out for you and which one for your companion? 

How can you honor your pet’s energetic personality so that you can help your animal companion to feel safe and heard?

Why compatibility matters

Compatibility is not “perfect match” or “wrong.” It’s a map of where your energies ease one another and where they contrast. Two earth-type creatures might be blissfully calm together, a fire guardian with a water companion can learn to give space after excitement so the water soul can regroup. The key is not to change the other, it’s to design the environment and your responses so both of you can thrive.

How to start: a simple 3-step system

1. Notice: watch one hour of your companion and note patterns: Does she pace? Seek soft places? Demand play?

2. Try one “Try tonight” strategy above that best fits your companion’s main pattern.

3. Repeat the micro-plan for seven days and note small changes, reduced pacing, quieter nights, easier exits.

   
   

Tip: Whenever making changes to your companion’s schedule, keep a daily journal to track what is working and what isn’t. Make note of any changes, big or small. You might be surprised at how much difference you might see from one change. 

If you want clarification on both of your Personal Elemental Signatures™, take the Elemental Quiz. 

It’s a quick snapshot of you and your companion’s tendencies and gives a practical starting point you can use to build trust and deepen your relationship.

Want more? Quiz, guides, and next steps

Find more insightful articles, downloadable guides, order my book Moving Beyond Words, and sign up for upcoming courses on my website. You can also join our Facebook community to share wins, ask questions, and get support from other guardians navigating the same changes.

Small, consistent shifts compound into calmer days. Start with curiosity, try one element-matched change tonight, and notice what softens. Your companion will notice too. Honoring both of your elemental energies will help create the happier, healthier, calmer, and more harmonious relationship that you have both been dreaming of. 

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Read more from Arlana Tanner-Sibelle

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Arlana Tanner-Sibelle, Interspecies Connection & Wellness Coach l Author

Arlana Tanner-Sibelle is the founder of We Wellness Solutions and the author of Moving Beyond Words: A Transformational Guide for Animal Guardians and Their Companions. With over 25 years of experience in holistic wellness and a lifetime of working with animals, she blends intuitive insight with integrative healing modalities to support both people and their companions. Arlana helps animal guardians create happier, healthier, and more harmonious relationships by guiding them from stress and frustration into calm, trust, and deeper connection.