Reclaiming Balance in a Culture Obsessed With Thinness
- Apr 23
- 5 min read
Carmela is an internationally recognised yoga educator and movement specialist with over 25 years of experience. She is the founder of Yoga Rhyth’OM and leads teacher trainings, retreats, and wellness programs that blend traditional wisdom with modern science.
The narrative around body image has shifted again! Strength and muscles were being celebrated. It was about health over aesthetics. The messaging began to move away from the relentless pursuit of thinness and toward something far more sustainable: vitality, strength, longevity, and well-being.
But the old trend is resurfacing. That being thin is in. And for many of us, this trend isn’t just cultural noise, it touches something deeply personal; it certainly does for me.
Growing up, I was teased for being chubby. I didn’t quite understand, as I was happy and it didn’t bother me how I looked, until the teasing started. I was teased at school by other children and within the family unit. Like many young people trying to make sense of the world, I internalized the message that there was something wrong with me, wrong with how I looked.
So I tried to fix it. I wanted to be liked, to be loved, to be accepted, and I thought being skinny was the answer. I became obsessed with my weight. That was the beginning of years of struggle, mentally and physically. I became my own worst critic and spoke unkindly to myself, constantly.
I became very skinny. It was a painful process, but I was relentless, exercising fervently, counting calories, eating less, or purging what I did eat. But what happened next surprised me. I was teased again! This time for my “chicken legs.”
No matter how we try to shape ourselves to meet external expectations, there will always be another standard waiting. Another opinion. Another trend. I realized, very slowly over time, that the body was never really the problem. What I was looking for was something much deeper, a sense of belonging.
The hidden cost of restriction
When we deprive our body, the mind rarely becomes calmer. In fact, the opposite often happens.
From a physiological perspective, restriction places the nervous system into a state of stress. The body perceives scarcity and begins to hold tightly to resources. Hormonal signals shift. Cravings intensify. Thoughts around food and control become obsessive.
I was never guided or supported; I stopped menstruating, I felt tired and dizzy, I felt cold all the time, I was irritable, and found it hard to concentrate. I was taken to the family doctor, who said, “You better start eating, otherwise you will be hospitalized and force-fed through a tube.”
But beyond biology, there is also a psychological consequence. When we are constantly fighting our own body, the mind becomes a battleground. Instead of peace, there is tension. Instead of trust, there is control. Instead of nourishment, there is deprivation.
A yogic perspective on balance
In 1996, I was introduced to yoga. As months went by, I started to notice a mental shift; I started to become acutely aware of my thoughts and my behavior toward my body. I started to see a light streaming through the cracks of darkness and despair that I was experiencing. Through this awareness and a daily practice, something remarkable happened, the layer of self-destructive behavior started to loosen. I felt I could breathe fully again.
Yoga offers a radically different lens through which to view the body. In classical yogic philosophy, the body is not an object to perfect or control. It is a vehicle for awareness, a sacred instrument through which we experience life.
The ancient text The Bhagavad Gita reminds us of the importance of moderation:
“Yoga is not for one who eats too much, nor for one who eats too little.” (Bhagavad Gita 6.16)
Balance is the path. This teaching feels particularly relevant in a culture that swings between extremes, overindulgence on one side, rigid restriction on the other.
True health lives somewhere in the middle. Yoga encourages us to develop awareness rather than control.
When the body is supported, it finds balance
When we move the body regularly, nourish it with whole foods, rest adequately, and cultivate mental clarity through meditation, the body often begins to regulate itself.
Not through force. But through intelligence. The body is remarkably wise when we stop interfering with it. It naturally seeks equilibrium.
But perhaps the most overlooked practice is how we speak to ourselves. The internal dialogue we carry toward our body matters deeply. For many people, the harshest voice they hear each day is their own. Yoga invites us to soften this voice.
To cultivate ahimsa, the principle of non-harming, not only toward others, but toward oneself.
Practical tools from a yogic lens
For anyone struggling with body image or caught in the cycle of control and deprivation, here are a few simple practices drawn from yoga that can help restore balance.
Nourish, don’t punish: Instead of exercising to “fix” the body, shift the intention toward caring for it. Movement becomes far more sustainable when it arises from gratitude rather than criticism.
Practice mindful eating: Rather than focusing on rigid food rules, cultivate awareness around nourishment. Eat slowly. Notice how different foods make you feel. Choose whole, nourishing foods often, while allowing flexibility. Balance is far more sustainable than perfection.
Create space for stillness: Meditation allows us to see the patterns of the mind without becoming entangled in them. Often the critical thoughts we believe so strongly lose their power when we simply watch them arise and pass. Meditation apps like Insight Timer are a good place to start if you need guidance.
Speak kindly to yourself: This may sound simple, but it is profound. The words we repeat internally shape our sense of reality. Replacing harsh self-talk with gentler and kind language can gradually transform our relationship with our body.
Coming home to ourselves
After nearly three decades of practicing yoga, the relationship with my body looks and feels vastly different than it did when I was younger. Over the years, I realized that I no longer try to mold myself into a particular shape or look a particular way. It is about listening. Supporting. Respecting the body’s intelligence and recognizing that this body, just as it is, carries me through life, through experience, through growth.
Yoga has taught me that the body is not the measure of our worth. It is simply the vehicle through which we experience this human journey. The real work of yoga is not found in shrinking ourselves to meet unrealistic expectations nor in forcing the body to conform to trends. Rather, it is found in cultivating awareness, balance, and a deeper connection to who we truly are.
When we begin to cultivate genuine care, love, and compassion from within, something quietly shifts. The harsh inner commentary softens, and the need to constantly measure or criticize begins to dissolve. From this place, the body is no longer viewed through a distorted lens of judgment but through one of appreciation.
Perhaps healing begins the moment we stop trying to become less and start remembering the fullness of who we already are.
Read more from Carmela Lacey
Carmela Lacey, Yoga Teacher, Movement Educator, Wellness Advocate
Carmela is a highly regarded yoga and movement educator with over 25 years of teaching experience. As the founder of Yoga Rhyth’OM, she combines traditional yogic philosophy with modern movement science to create transformative experiences for her students. Her work spans yoga teacher trainings, women's wellness retreats, and educational programs/classes focused on functional movement, breathwork, and cyclical living. Known for her grounded wisdom and heartfelt teaching style, Carmela empowers others to move with awareness, age with grace, and live in rhythm with nature. Learn more about her offerings and articles through her Brainz profile.
