Radical Responsibility – Life, Loss, And Living
- Brainz Magazine
- Aug 16, 2024
- 4 min read
Heather J. Crider is a high-performance neurocoach on a mission to eradicate self-doubt, fuel resilience, and create limitless freedom. After experiencing several significant emotional experiences, she knew there had to be a better way to live without stress and struggle.
Life is fragile. This truth has been woven into the fabric of my existence over the past few decades as I’ve endured significant losses—some of my closest relatives and friends have passed away. Each time, the weight of their absence forces me to pause, grieve, and contemplate the essence of life. In those moments, I’m reminded of how delicate our time here truly is, how quickly it can slip through our fingers, leaving only memories in its wake. Yet, as time marches on, I find myself slipping back into the same patterns, forgetting the precious gift that each day brings.
Death is no stranger to me. With each loss, I’ve wrestled with the same question: How do I truly live? How do I honor the lives of those who have gone before me while still embracing my own? It’s a question that doesn't just visit me in the quiet moments of grief; it follows me, shadowing my daily routines, and challenging the way and how I approach each new day. It’s a question that lingers, one that I often push aside as I fall back into the routines of daily life. But the truth is, each loss serves as a stark reminder that life is too short to live on autopilot.
Many of us spend our lives wondering, “How much do I have to give?” or “How much can I get?” But what if we approached life differently? What if, instead, we asked, “What’s the most I can possibly give?” This shift in perspective—moving from a mindset of scarcity to one of radical generosity—can transform not just our lives but the lives of those around us. It’s about living with intention, taking accountability for our actions, and being of service to others with a genuine desire to give and to live fully in the process.
For a long time, I hid behind a shield of doubt and insecurity, not really living but waiting to live. There were many periods when I suffered from anxiety and depression, telling myself that one day, when the time was right, I would fully embrace life—when I accomplished more, or achieved more... or any number of other excuses. I often found myself too busy preparing, waiting for something to shift or happen that I forgot to actually live.
There’s a quote that has resurfaced in my life time and time again: “Many people die with their song still inside them because they are too busy getting ready to live, and often, time runs out.” I’ve taken this message to heart at times, but too often, I’ve found myself falling back into old patterns and ruts—good or bad.
Recently, I lost an aunt, a cousin, a friend, a colleague, and, most recently, an uncle. Each had a unique impact on my life, and I’ve been left to grapple with what their absence truly means. Have I really ‘lost’ them? Or is there a way to carry their legacy forward in my own life? Their lives had meaning; they made an impact, and to honor them, I must live my life more fully, give more, serve more, and smile more.
As I lay my head on the pillow each night, I ask myself: “What did I do today to become a better human being? To make a better contribution? To be a better mate, leader, parent—how was I better today than yesterday?” And if I don’t have an answer, that’s okay. I remind myself that tomorrow is a new day and an opportunity to make a difference. Like the power of compound interest, small, consistent efforts can transform our lives and the lives of those around us over time.
I bring these thoughts to you today as a humble reminder that life is precious, living is a gift, and living more fully, present, mindful, loving, and impactful is the ultimate gift we can give to those who have passed on. I pledge this for myself—to appreciate each moment a little bit more today and every day. To live with radical responsibility, to give with radical generosity, and to be of service in the most meaningful way possible.
Heather J. Crider, High-Performance NeuroCoach, Keynote Speaker
Heather J. Crider is a high-performance neuro coach on a mission to eradicate self-doubt, fuel resilience, and create limitless freedom. After experiencing several significant emotional experiences, she knew there had to be a better way to live without stress and struggle. She has dedicated her life to helping others (re)discover greatness by fueling passion and applying practical strategies to 'filter the funk' to retrain and optimize the brain for success. A keynote speaker, host of the Go Reflect Yourself Podcast, and creator of numerous brain-based transformational programs, her mission is to help make the world a more compassionate & mindful place, starting with one thought & one mind at a time.
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