Imposter Syndrome – 5 Tips to Becoming Your Own Biggest Cheerleader
Written by: Jean Fleming, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Imposter Syndrome affects around 70% of the population, and contrary to popular belief, it affects around the same number of men as it does women. But what is Imposter Syndrome, and what can you do to control it?
Imposter Syndrome, or Imposter Phenomenon, is defined in Collins English Dictionary as “a persistent feeling of being unworthy of one's status or success.” – and that is despite external evidence of competence and success. So, what does that mean in practice? It’s that voice in your head that tells you things such as:
I do not know as much as my peers.
I am not good enough to go for that promotion at work.
Everyone else here knows more than me.
They are going to find out I am a fraud.
The result of all this negative talk in your head is that you can hold yourself back from achieving. You do not share those great ideas in the team meeting. You do not go for the promotion at work that, deep down, you know you are qualified and capable of getting. All this can have a negative effect on your business or organization and simply leave you feeling unhappy and unfulfilled.
If you have experienced Imposter Syndrome, you are certainly not alone. The good news is that there is lots you can do - here are 5 tips:
1. Identify your triggers.
There are many situations where Imposter Syndrome can kick in, and differing from your peers in some way can often bring this on. For example, are you younger or older than your peers? Are you the only female in a male-dominated team or only male in a predominantly female team? These situations can often lead to feelings of being a fraud. Take the age example; if you are younger than your peers, this can often lead to the belief that you do not have enough experience, or you will not be taken seriously by older colleagues – with age comes the assumption of experience. Knowing your triggers is the first step to getting Imposter Syndrome under control by allowing you to stop and think rationally about what is going on.
2. Keep an achievement log.
At the end of every day, write down what you achieved that day. It doesn’t always have to be major achievements, and they can be personal or professional. Did you get the kids to school on time? Did you get that proposal sent off? Did you finally clear your emails? Write it all down at the end of each day, and you will be amazed at what you achieve each day – I bet it’s way more than you think! The purpose of this is to increase your confidence in yourself and prove to yourself how much you achieve daily.
3. Understand and celebrate your strengths.
Being asked in a job interview to describe your strengths is always a hard question. But if you were asked to describe your partner, friend, or colleague's strengths, I bet you would reel off a list a mile long! Try asking someone you trust to tell you what they think your strengths are. Not only will this boost your confidence, but it will also give you some external validation which is always nice.
4. Re-write your stories.
When you experience Imposter Syndrome, try re-writing the narrative in your head. To give an example, instead of saying to yourself, "Everyone here knows more than me, I'm going to get found out." Try saying to yourself: "Everyone here is so knowledgeable and experienced. I'm going to learn so much from them." Turn the scary negative story into a bright and positive one.
5. Be kind to yourself – what would you say to your best friend?
To put this into context, I had a photoshoot recently for my marketing materials. Like a contestant in a Miss World Competition, I waited for the results to come in. 135 photos later, the horror hit me – I look terrible in half my clothes! Too tight, too short, too….just not right! And then I stopped and listened to myself, and I realized that I am talking to myself in a way that I would never speak to my best friend. I would encourage her, point out the good points in the photos – her beautiful smile, how her personality shines through. And I realized that I need to be my own best friend and speak to myself with the warmth and kindness I would speak to my best friend. Next time you find yourself criticizing yourself, stop and think about what you would say to your best friend and be kind to yourself.
Try using these techniques today and turn that negative voice in your head into your biggest cheerleader.
Jean Fleming, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Jean Fleming is an empowerment and leadership coach helping women to create the life they want. With over 30 years of business and HR experience, Jean was the first woman to join the Board of a global company – a role she still fulfills 11 years later.
Jean is an experienced ICF accredited Coach, a DiSC Profiler, an Emotional Intelligence EQi-2.0 Assessor, and a Fellow of the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development (CIPD). Jean uses her extensive range of skills and experience to bring a dynamic and supportive service to her clients to help them identify and create the life they want.
