I Am Choosing This Over Busy

Written by: Allison Castle, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.

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Have you ever noticed or answered the questions “How are you?” or “How have you been?” with “I’ve been busy” or “Staying busy”.

Lately, I have become aware of that response and how often I say it. Then I might follow up and elaborate on what has been keeping me busy; client appointments, kids’ activities, projects around the house, etc.

In my typical fashion awareness tends to lead to reflection and analysis!

So why do I choose the word busy to describe how I am or how things are going rather than saying I’m great or I’m happy or I’m enjoying life? What am I intending to communicate to the asker? Do I want them to have a certain perception of me and my life? Am I worried about judgment or do I perhaps want some sort of validation?

Busy can be a badge of honor. Society seems to glorify and reward busyness. If I am busy, I am working hard and working hard has been a highly desirable characteristics in our world. If I am not working hard and putting in the hours, am I lazy? If I am lazy, what am I doing with my life, what is my purpose? If I am not busy, if I am not doing, am I good enough, am I worthy?

It is also easy to actually really feel busy all of the time. There are endless to do lists, overbooked calendars, constant connection to everything and everyone. This connection can bring the assumption of constant availability and make everything an emergency. Do you remember the days where you could leave your work at work and not have it follow you home on your phone? Do you remember the days when people had to leave a message on your answering machine when you were out of the house and may have to wait several hours or even days for your response?

It makes sense that busy is a word we might regularly use to describe life.

It is easy to get swept up in the hustle, the rush, the busyness. The word busy feels like there is barely time to breathe. It makes me wonder how often we are actually enjoying the moment we are in rather than racing towards the next one. Living at that pace feels like wishing time away.

So, from my analysis I know that I want to continue to embrace something different. I want my life to be fulfilling and fun!

I want to work to feel more like play. I want to glorify rest and recharge. I want to be as fully present as I can be in every moment. I want my purpose to be more about being and less about doing and having.

This doesn’t mean that I just suddenly drop everything. I still have my to-do lists and may still have more colored areas than blank space on my calendar. But I can choose to be intentional with what is on my to-do list and what is on my calendar. I chose to honor my no and have healthy boundaries. I can choose to have the mindset of what I get to do rather than what I have to do. I chose to recognize my intrinsic worth rather than seeking validation from others.

I am choosing a life that’s full instead of busy.

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Allison Castle, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Allison Castle is a Mastery Certified Transformational Coach, Meditation Teacher, and Certified Public Accountant. After years of following the "expected path," chasing the traditional standards of success, and coming up short on feeling successful or fulfilled, Allison created her Life Alignment Coaching Program to help women stop waiting until they reach that milestone (number on a scale, job title, income level, etc.) to finally find the feeling of fulfillment and success that they have been working so hard for. Her mission: Don't wait for the destination. Enjoy the Journey!