Conscious Conversations
- Sep 30, 2021
- 5 min read
Written by: Samantha Leske, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Yesterday over lunch my girls and I were discussing narcissism.
What it looks like, and how it’s created.
You see, we have one in our family.
When we take the time to have real conversations with our children, it means they don’t need to have these experiences to a brutal extent to learn and understand.
It gifts them with the knowledge of what to look for, and then allows them to decide the role they wish to play.
( their power should be theirs from day 1, not something they have to take back)
We may have been born into certain lines of energy, and certain ancestral vibrations but we do get to choose.
However, we don’t get to choose, if we can’t see it coming.
First point of action is making sure our kids love themselves, and have a high level of self esteem.
Second is being able to spot it. What does unhealthy behaviour look like? ( it’s not about judgment, it’s about being real 1+1=2)
Third is feeling safe to express their voice, and any no that may need to be said ( even to you)
It’s also about educating them as to how these things are created, so they understand what choices they really have.
In a world where gaslighting is standard practice, they need to understand what this means too.
Narcissists are created from childhood trauma/ wounds.
Their needs were not met, and so now they twist whatever they need to, to make sure it is. It’s a party for one, and as long as their needs are met, it’s all hunky-dory.
Regardless of what that means for anyone else involved.
Gaslighting and narcissism go hand in hand.
Empaths are their preferred choice. They love to feed off of an empath in despair.
Knowing this, allows you to have choice in how you handle the narcissist in your life and let’s be real, they’re everywhere. We need to educate our children on true life skills, rather than leaving it to the education system and then wondering how things have collapsed for our kids..
When we force a child to be in a class with 25 other kids and just expect them to get along, you are asking them to ignore their bodies reactions and natural guidance system ( their intuition) and do the right thing ( for who, is the question)
Those funny feelings, those warning signs cannot be acknowledged or acted upon in this type of setting. Our children are being trained to ignore those gut feelings, to never offend or speak out of turn.
How can we expect our children to spot danger, if they aren’t allowed to feel their feelings?
Not all danger is immediately evident, otherwise the rates of DV would be much lower.
It’s a process where they hand over their power, 1 decision at a time until it’s out of control.
We have record numbers of women dying because they didn’t know how to fight for their power, they didn’t know their own worth and became trapped in one way or another.
Maybe children end up being a part of the situation, maybe they don’t- but what I know for sure is that even when they’re finally free, it takes years to really recover.
DV isn’t a socio-economic issue either, there are plenty of educated women living In this situation.
Feeling safe in expressing ourselves and being allowed to trust our feelings- no matter how inconvenient it is for those around us is a start.
How can we expect our children to have a voice when there are more lessons on shutting up and conforming and only saying or doing nice things?
How can we expect our kids to feel, and be real when what we really need is for them to conform easily, so we can have an easy morning and get to work on time,.without drama?
If we are creating a new earth, this means the people within need to behave to a higher standard.
It means being real, and holding space for others to do the same even when it’s not pretty.
It means educating our kids on things that they will experience - narcissism being just one issue.
It means giving them the tools to make an educated choice, a voice to speak their truth, a knowing that they are divine and a true blessing, a parent that they can call on no matter what, and protection wherever it’s needed - even at 40 if it’s required.
This world is changing, and all the shitty stuff is being exposed.
But while the dark is being shown for what it is, I’m watching some pretty damn amazing souls step into their mission.
We’re going to be okay, but we need to give our kids the life skills they actually need.
How to say no without apology
How to cope/ interact with a narcissist
How to be emotionally resilient and aware
How to truly look after and love yourself
How to feel comfortable being in your own company
How to manage your money ( how to make it too!)
Ethics
Morals
Responsibility
And how to read energy, manage it and maintain it.
Oh and how to tell someone to fuck off when they have truly earnt it.
If they have the freedom and support to stand up to the bully - the cutting, the eating disorder, the alcohol and drugs may not have been a necessary coping mechanism.
Our children are our responsibility.
The life skills they step into this world with are our responsibility.
Their job is easier if we have prepared them, and they know we have their backs.
It’s time to connect with our kids. To meet their needs, where they are ( you meet the need, the unwanted behaviour disappears) and actually prepare them with the skill set they require, to navigate this wonderful, but sometimes pretty crazy and unhealthy world we are living in.
Conscious conversations is where this begins…
It’s time to prepare the empaths, so narcissism is no longer required as a teaching tool.
It’s a hard way to learn and often takes years to recover from.
Evolution is here, and it begins with a salad and a chat.
Sending love
Sam x
Samantha Leske, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Samantha Leske is a Spiritual Healer, and the CEO of Nurture you, Heal you.
She specializes in trauma/ shadow work and teaching women how to love themselves unconditionally. After working in the industry for over 12 years, she has a varied skill set that allows the healings she offers, to incorporate all levels of a souls journey from this life to past and birthing timelines.
Samantha has recently become a best selling author on Amazon from her contribution to the multi-author book "Intuitive, knowing her truth"
Her goals in life are to live a quiet rural life with her children and animals, while engaging in her soul led mission - to help as many people awaken and heal. Loving them while they come home to themselves and their own unconditional love and acceptance for themselves. To actively be apart of the solution
