Before The First Session – Progress Purgatory
- May 31, 2023
- 3 min read
Written by: Thomas Goenczi, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
The most common question that breaches the surface after initially deciding to attend counselling is “Now, what?” Now, what indeed... Making the conscious decision in itself is only half the battle. The final stage of initiating counselling is booking your appointment. Now, for some when a decision is made, action quickly follows. However, others, find themselves wavering between their decisions, and thus find themselves in a state of progress purgatory. “Do I really need to do this?” “It's probably not going to help anyways?” “Why bother changing, life hasn’t been that bad?” “What if my counsellor doesn’t get me?” are common questions that reverberate in the mind when entrenched in purgatory. The innate spark of needing to better oneself burns quickly and one must attend to it in an efficient and deliberate manner when it occurs. If not, one could find themselves stuck in a state of wanting to progress but unable to act on it.
There is slowly a cultural shift toward the importance of mental health, which has led to the proliferation of mental health professionals in our communities. Nowadays, you could cast a line and you would more than likely hook a counsellor or two. This abundance of riches, like most things, has its advantages and drawbacks. The endless number of options to choose from can cause a dizzying effect on oneself. However, it doesn’t have to be a vertigo-inducing experience. Sure, it is important to find someone you think can assist you with your mental health struggles, but there have been many cases where the client was referred to a professional that they didn’t choose and still had success. If you do have the autonomy to select a therapist do so in a measured manner, find someone that has experience or an interest in the area you are struggling with. Some practitioners are specialists, and some are more holistic and take a generalist approach. A simple search engine search will provide a wide list of trained and certified practitioners in the area. Moreover, there are directories such as Psychology Today that provide a more streamlined and efficient search.
Making the decision to be vulnerable and open up isn’t easy. However, it is necessary to do so if one takes on the endeavor of overcoming their mental health struggles. One must attempt to use the initial momentum one gets from deciding to go to counselling; that palpable dopamine rush that ensues when a decision is made with some effort and conviction. It is imperative to not negate the wish to go to counselling, even when we are confronted with procrastination or doubt, if so, we find ourselves in a state of perpetual limbo; never doing, rather always thinking about doing.
There is a wide spectrum of emotions and thoughts that often bloom during this anticipatory period. Questioning whether or not this is something you really want to do, what it’s going to be like, or if it will even help, are provocations signaled from the undercurrent of our anxieties towards this process. There are two forces that rule the limbo state described, and they are fear and apathy – these two play a significant role in our lives, and it is vital to reflect on them when we can. We often fear the potential outcome or are enveloped by a sense of apathy that is expressed through a lack of will or motivation. When you notice these two come up there’s a good chance, you’re coming up on something that has meaning for yourself, and you must press forward to see yourself on the other side of it. In doing so you are able to escape the state of progress purgatory and finally move into a sense of growth.
Thomas Goenczi, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Thomas Goenczi, is a veteran of the Royal Canadian Navy, serving for seven years. After leaving the military Thomas pursued his Master of Counselling (Psychology). He now is a clinical counsellor providing his service through his private practice – Well Then Therapy. Thomas focuses on helping his clients and readers uncovering their unconscious roots of their mental struggles and reinfusing there lives with meaning. Thomas has recently reconnected with the military community with the mission of fostering an acceptance towards mental health. He is currently contributor to the Naval Newspaper. Lastly, he has a keen interest in psychoanalytic work, working with one's will, and psychedelic-assisted psychotherapy.
