Would I Be the Woman I Am Today If I Hadn't Become a Mom at 16?
- Jul 2
- 5 min read
Written by Sarah Pearce, Certified Doula
Sarah Pearce is a nationally recognized full-spectrum doula, previous pediatric nurse, placenta specialist, and midwifery student with nearly a decade of experience supporting families through fertility, birth, postpartum, and newborn care. She is the founder of Trinity Doula Services, one of the largest doula agencies in the St. Louis region.
We are 75 percent water, 25 percent dry mass, 50 percent spiritual beings, and 50 percent physical beings. These are also a map to the layout of our universe. We are lymphatic fluid, bones, and flesh, spirit, soul, and body. Have you ever seen a Russian or Japanese nesting doll? Imagine you have a total of seven, and you remove them one by one, they reveal themselves smaller and smaller. Let's take a closer look.
Growing up under the weight of expectations
I was raised in a religious family in the heart of the Bible Belt. Faith was central to our lives, but so was something I didn't fully understand until I became an adult, the pressure to appear as though everything was perfect.
When I became pregnant at sixteen, I didn't just fear becoming a mother, I feared becoming an embarrassment. As my pregnancy became more noticeable, my mother sometimes asked me to stay home because she worried about what the neighbors would think, what people at church would say, and how our family would be perceived.
Looking back today, I understand she was carrying her own fears and doing what she believed would protect our family from judgment. But sixteen-year-old me interpreted it very differently. I felt like I needed to disappear.
I painted my baby's crib at a friend's house because my mother didn't want the neighbors seeing us prepare for a baby. I stopped participating in many of the activities my friends enjoyed. Even going to the grocery store felt overwhelming because I was convinced everyone was staring at me, whether they actually were or not.
Shame has a remarkable ability to convince us that everyone is watching. It teaches us to become smaller, quieter, invisible. No young mother should ever feel like she has to hide while preparing to welcome her child into the world.
Statistics didn't define my future
If you looked only at the statistics, my future probably wouldn't have looked very promising. Research has consistently shown that teen mothers are significantly less likely to graduate from high school than their peers, and only about half earn a diploma by their early twenties.
I graduated a year early while raising a one-year-old daughter. Statistics also suggest that adolescent mothers are less likely to pursue higher education and often face long-term financial challenges.
Since then, I've become a Licensed Practical Nurse, founded one of the Midwest's largest full spectrum doula agencies, serve as Executive Director of a growing nonprofit organization, educate future birth professionals, and am currently pursuing certification as a Certified Professional Midwife.
Statistics matter because they identify where support is needed. They should never become ceilings that limit what people believe is possible.
The difference between judgment and support
As I navigated pregnancy, birth, and early motherhood, one truth became painfully obvious. There was no shortage of opinions, criticism, or people willing to tell me what I had done wrong. What was missing was support.
Years later, when I discovered birthwork, something inside me clicked. I realized I wasn't simply choosing a career, I was becoming the person I desperately needed when I was sixteen.
Every family deserves someone who sees them before they judge them, someone who educates before they criticize, and someone who walks beside them instead of standing above them. That belief became the foundation of Trinity Doula Services.
Today, our team serves families throughout Missouri, Illinois, Indiana, and Kentucky through birth support, postpartum care, childbirth education, placenta encapsulation, and newborn services. But what we truly provide is something much harder to measure, we provide belonging.
When one mission became two
Working with families taught me something I hadn't anticipated. Birth support alone wasn't enough. Parents also needed diapers, formula, baby clothes, community, and someone willing to say, "We're here."
That realization led me to become Executive Director of The Little Resource Center. What began as a single location in Arnold, Missouri, has expanded into six locations throughout Eastern Missouri and Southern Illinois. Every expansion has been driven by one simple belief, people thrive when they feel supported, not judged.
Three lessons becoming a teen mom taught me about leadership
Looking back twenty years later, I realize becoming a mother at sixteen taught me lessons that no classroom ever could.
Compassion creates more change than criticism: People rarely become their best selves because someone shamed them. They grow because someone believed they were capable of more. That philosophy guides every birth I attend and every team member I mentor.
Your circumstances don't determine your contribution: My story could have ended at sixteen. Instead, it became the beginning of everything meaningful I've built. Leadership isn't determined by where you start, it's determined by what you choose to build from where you are.
Support changes outcomes: I didn't overcome difficult circumstances because I was extraordinary. I succeeded because people invested in me, believed in me, challenged me, and opened doors for me. Today, I have the privilege of doing the same for other families.
Success looks different than I once imagined
I've had the honor of being featured in publications including Brainz Magazine, Wellness Master Club, Voyage STL, and CanvasRebel. I've been recognized as one of Southern Illinois' 20 Under 40. Those are accomplishments I'm incredibly grateful for, but they aren't what define success.
Success is the mother who tells me she finally felt heard during her birth. The postpartum family who gets to sleep because someone showed up. The student who discovers a career serving families. The parent who walks into one of our resource centers feeling ashamed to ask for help and leaves feeling seen instead. Those moments matter far more than any headline.
So, would I be the woman I am today?
I still don't know. Maybe I would have found another path. Maybe I would have discovered another purpose. But I do know this, the little girl I gave birth to twenty years ago didn't keep me from achieving my dreams, she inspired them. Everything I've built began the day I became her mother.
If there's one lesson I hope readers take away from my story, it's this, your hardest chapter doesn't have to become your identity. Sometimes it becomes your introduction. Sometimes, the life you never planned becomes the one you were always meant to live.
Read more from Sarah Pearce
Sarah Pearce, Certified Doula
Sarah Pearce is a highly sought-after birth and postpartum expert, a previous LPN specialising pediatrics, a placenta encapsulation specialist, and the founder of Trinity Doula Services, a rapidly growing full-spectrum doula agency serving Missouri and Illinois. With over a decade of hands-on experience in fertility, labor support, physiologic birth, postpartum recovery, newborn care, and high-pressure pediatric nursing, she has become known for combining evidence-based education with deeply intuitive support. Sarah has supported families through all types of birth settings and is working towards becoming a Certified Professional Midwife. Her work empowers families during life's most transformative moments.
