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Why You Should Stop "Trying To Be" Spiritual & 5 Ideas To Do Instead

Written by: Helena Carrizosa, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.


Often when I hear people talk about "being more spiritual," I hear so many shoulds like, you should meditate, give to charity, be a good person, do yoga, pray, think only happy thoughts, and go to spiritual retreats… And there is nothing wrong with these ideas. They are spiritual practices, however, when they become shoulds attached with judgment or comparing to others and ourselves and guilt if we don't do them, they quickly become a source of negative energy. This is because the word should create resistance, even if it's associated with a positive idea or ideal.

So, please forget about the should and STOP trying so hard to be spiritual!

(I had to say this to myself too)

You must be asking yourself, WHY would I invite you to stop trying to be spiritual?

The answer is simple...

Because trying to be Spiritual is not letting you... "BE" spiritual. Because trying to become something is actually implying that you are not! However, here is the thing...regardless of what you do or do not do...


Plot twist!

So, let me ask you, if you are already spiritual, which part of you is trying to be spiritual?

The answer would be the ego. Your ego might say: "I can't do this or say that if I want to be more spiritual”...or “I must behave, dress and talk in a certain way so I can be seen as more spiritual. The ego often attempts to impose and enforce rules around what it deems to be “spiritual” or “not spiritual” and the ego may become demanding and judgemental. So getting familiar with your ego is an important part of the spiritual process but is not your best guide to light the way towards it. Going gently and lightly can be far more profound and impactful than applying brute force and willpower, which tends to be the way of the ego!

So, what if spirituality is more about doing less than doing more?

To some people, the concept of doing less may seem ridiculous or may even evoke a feeling of tension or annoyance. If these feelings pop up, have the awareness that these feelings are a likely reaction from the ego, especially if you have invested a lot of time and attention around doing more to be spiritual.

So let’s take a deep breath and relax. And let's start with one doing that is necessary to be spiritual, and that it’s to “BREATHE.” And the good news is that you are already doing this without any conscious effort! To go even deeper, perhaps whilst you breathe, you could also put some awareness on the sensation of the breath, and the moment you are experiencing, and indeed, the being that is experiencing it!

With the following ideas, I invite you to embrace what is already inside you with a minimum of doing and avoiding shoulds. Please note these ideas are not a formula as spirituality is not a linear nor a fixed experience. And these ideas are not for you to try "to be" spiritual, but to be aware of the fact that you already are! It’s about embracing your truth and sensing your flow with balance and harmony inside.

Idea 1Observe

Take time to observe what is showing up for you inside. Here is where meditation can come as a useful tool but not a necessary one to apply this idea.

Take time to hear, sense, and feel the state of your internal world. Check-in with your physical, emotional, and mental states and develop more awareness about yourself and how the world is impacting you.

When we are not in touch with what is inside of us, we easily get distracted and we tend to seek validation and direction from what is outside of us. We tend to observe how others do things and follow them without observing what is wanted to be expressed from the inside.

IDEA 2 Sense "YOUR" truth

Spirituality is about your soul's truth.

What resonates with you at a soul level?

In human terms, this means getting to know your true desires, needs, and wants, learning how you honestly feel, and accepting all of you, no matter how uncomfortable or how different it is from what the external world demands of you.

When we are not in our truth, we then operate through our ego, with unhelpful conditioning from the past and fear that mislead us and create confusion on our path.

Not acknowledging our truth oftentimes is what makes us feel disconnected from life and take decisions we’ll later regret!

IDEA 3 Embrace

Embrace what comes into your life!

Easier said than done, I know! I also need a constant reminder of this.

However, when you embrace the fact that this situation is coming to you for a reason, you can start observing what is trying to show you, what truth is wanting to surface and then embrace whatever message comes to you or learning or invitation to grow, to question, to evolve...

And perhaps sometimes you won't know the reason, and that is ok. You can still embrace the experience, take it day by day and go through it as best as you can, with love and compassion.

Extra tip: when we take responsibility for ourselves, our actions and outcomes as our creations, we can see the lesson or the why of a situation more clearly, and this becomes a very healing spiritual process.

IDEA 4Trust, Flow & Listen

Spirituality is an invitation to let go of control and trust.

I have to admit this one often also challenges me and therefore, I have to focus and be aware of myself when I am trying to control things.

However, with the help of mindfulness, you can try to let go of the steering wheel and trust all will work out for your greatest benefit.

But trusting in what?

In yourself and the fact that all the answers are inside of you, and the idea that the universe, the source, the light as you want to call it, is guiding you towards what is best for you.

Let it Flow

Going with the flow is about following your curiosity and accepting the invitations you receive from life!

Listen "with" your intuition.

When you consciously manage to let go of control, be aware and observe what is showing up for you, you can then embrace the situation and be still in your mind so you can listen to your heart and decode any message that can come to you through your intuition.

The challenge is to learn to listen to the most difficult moments you face. Not easy to do, I oftentimes need a reminder to calm down, listen, and observe whilst seeking my truth in that situation.

IDEA 5Witness the signs

The signs are there, you just need to open your eyes and senses to witness them!

At the moment, you are more connected internally, more in your truth, in the now, and as you become a better observer, you'll begin to witness the most magical moments spirituality is about. You'll start witnessing the signs and synchronicities that are guiding you towards your connection to the right flow of your life.

I hope these ideas resonate with you, they are just an invitation to be more in the balance between the two, the being and the doing. They are a base from which you are free to be open to exploring more experiences that can enhance your spiritual being. Be mindful to look for these experiences from a place of curiosity and inspiration, so you don't fall into the demands and judgements of the ego!

Remember that just by being in a state of loving what is around you and enjoying what you do and how you feel, would heighten your vibration, which will have an impact on everyone and the world around you!

And this is one of the most spiritual contributions you can give to yourself and others!

Let’s stay connected on Facebook & LinkedIn, and for more information on how to connect to the right flow of your life, please visit my website.


Helena Carrizosa, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Helena Carrizosa specializes in realigning people again to “The Flow of Life”, with the use of their intuition as a compass and superpower to help them feel empowered and thrive in all areas of their life and work. "THE FLOW OF LIFE IS A PROGRAM FOR TRANSFORMATION AND A WAY OF LIVING, WHERE WE ARE GUIDED CLOSER TO THE PATH THAT IS MEANT FOR US"

Helena is a passionate life and business coach who focuses on intuition, alignment and finding harmony on all levels of human experience, the mental, emotional, physical and spiritual. Through her practice, Helena provides clients with programs and courses so they can reactivate their sixth sense, reach ultimate success, and create a conscious impact on their life.



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