Why Many Smart Women Still Retire In Poverty
- Sep 16, 2024
- 5 min read
Updated: Mar 6, 2025
Written by Adrian Gentilcore, Multi-passionate Seniorpreneur
Adrian Gentilcore is a multi-passionate seniorpreneur. She runs Your Fairy Techmother for tech support services and Your Fairy Debtmother for financial coaching.
It’s natural to not think much about retirement when you’re younger. After all, you’ve got college, a career to launch, maybe marriage and kids (maybe not), and so many other things going on. But once you’re on the back side of 50, you start paying a lot more attention because the vague concept of retiring in poverty might be in your future. And it’s 'scary'.
However, it’s not too late at any age to start making your retirement a 'must have' rather than a 'nice to have'. When you set a goal and laser focus your efforts on it, you can really start making good progress.
But even smart, accomplished women can be derailed from saving for their retirement. Here are some of the ways they are holding themselves back.
They think their husband will take care of it
He might. But what if he doesn’t? Your husband may be a financial wizard who has everything perfectly organized for an ideal retirement for both of you. Or not. Have you discussed your retirement plan in detail with him? Yeah, he might get mad or defensive about it. But do you want to be one of the women who must retire in poverty because you had blind trust in your husband? There’s no Fairy Godmother coming to help you figure out your retirement.
Just like anyone else, some husbands are clueless about money. Some are focused on their retirement, but not necessarily yours. Some husbands run off with their secretary. Or one of you could become ill and eat up all your carefully saved resources. Some just drop dead of a heart attack and leave a financial disaster behind. Or blow it all on some business gamble. All these scenarios have happened to smart women at one time or another.
The point is – if you want a healthy retirement, it’s up to 'you'. Not your parents, not your husband, not your kids, and definitely not the government.
We can’t afford it – What about these bills?
That’s a perfectly valid point, especially in these times of inflation and financial distress. But budgets aren’t just black and white numbers. They tend to mysteriously adapt to changing needs and priorities.
Just think about it. If you had a family member who needed a life-saving surgery, or very expensive medication, what would you do? You’d find a way to get that money. Maybe you’d seek a higher paying position, or start a side hustle or small business, revise your budget to laser focus on finding that money. Somehow, you’d find a way.
The trick is to make your retirement savings a non-negotiable line item in your budget. Just like taxes, utilities, and other needs, shift it from the “nice-to-have” column to the “non-negotiable” column and put your thinking cap on. All sorts of possibilities will start popping up.
And automate it. It should come out automatically before you ever touch your paycheck. You don’t miss the money they take out for FICA, do you? It’s been taken out of every paycheck probably your whole life, so you don’t even count that money. Make your retirement savings at least as much a priority as taxes.
But what about college?
College 'is' important. You want to get your kids off to a good start and help them get decent jobs. However, paying for college is not written into the contract when you take that new baby home from the hospital.
Many kids don’t go to college and do just fine. Mine did. Many kids flunk out of college and waste your hard-earned investment. Or they might decide to go live in a yurt and weave baskets. Some kids get great scholarships and don’t need a lot of help. Other kids want to stay in college for a decade or more on 'your' dime. Every family is different, and every kid is different.
The point is, you are not obligated to pay for your kid’s college, especially if that investment comes at the cost of shortchanging your own retirement savings. Student loans are a thing. Retirement loans – not so much.
You’re not doing your kids any favors by creating a situation where your adult kids feel obligated to support you. They’ll have enough on their plate without that responsibility. Or they’ll feel terrible as they watch you frantically clip coupons and do without a healthy retirement because you sacrificed for their needs. That comes at far too high a price.
The key is 'balance'. Saving some for your retirement and setting aside some money for college. Maybe not a brand name University, but a more affordable State College. Maybe the kid works a part-time job or takes some student loans. It’s not a bad thing for the kid to have to put some skin in the game.
What life in poverty without retirement savings looks like
Many seniors are having to work years longer than they would wish to. That’s tough because age discrimination is 'huge' for older folks. The job market is rough enough for younger folks, but it’s nearly impossible for anyone over 60.
And that’s for the folks who are healthy enough to be able to work. Alzheimer’s, and other chronic illnesses are much more common in our aging population, and many are not compatible with a job situation.
Most of the costs you have now will carry over into your retirement years – housing (unless you have your home paid off), utilities, food, insurance, transportation, etc. They are likely to be even higher in retirement years due to inflation. How will you cover these costs once your paycheck stops?
It might be time to meet with a financial professional who can evaluate your current situation and estimate how much you need in retirement savings to support you in a healthy retirement. Then set some goals to help you get there.
Our current 401K system is one of the worst in the world. It gives people far too little guidance and far too much access to those critical retirement funds. Having trustworthy professional guidance may mean the difference between retiring in poverty or having a comfortable and happy retirement. You choose.
Read more from Adrian Gentilcore
Adrian Gentilcore, Multi-passionate Seniorpreneur
Adrian Gentilcore is a seasoned entrepreneur with a 40-year career in Corporate America and a proven track record of creating successful online businesses. Now a full-time freelancer, she operates two distinct brands: Your Fairy Techmother, where she specializes as a LinkedIn Trainer, Email Marketer, and Web Designer, and Your Fairy Debtmother, where she offers her expertise as a Debt-Free Coach and popular Personal Finance Blogger. In her 60s, Adrian continues to run her businesses alongside her 75-year-old sister, together coining the term seniorpreneur to capture the spirit of their dynamic partnership.
