The Offended Ones And What To Do About It
Written by: Marnix Pauwels, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
How do you make sure nobody ever gets offended?
You don’t.
You can’t.
You could try living in a cage and not say anything for ten years, but some person would still consider that ‘the easy way out’ and hate you for it.
You could try and please the whole world, but some people will think you’re weak and ridiculous, and that WILL piss them off.
You can be an asshole or a saint or something in between, but somehow someone always will be able to find something that isn’t to their liking.
And express that.
That’s what most people do.
They suffer from their thoughts and make the world responsible for the pain.
They feel uncomfortable and confused and want something or someone to blame, instead of working out what could be done, or changed, or learned.
The thing is: you can’t control people’s moods and worldviews and whatever is going on in their minds that they are totally willing to blame you for.
We will never be able to be the person everybody likes, because the person everybody is supposed to like is despised by many.
It’s never perfect.
People will find fault.
People will be offended.
So is there NOTHING you can do?
Well, no.
There IS a thing.
And it’s incredibly powerful.
It’s having the intention to live an enlightened life.
To be sincere and kind and genuine and autonomous.
It’s about coming from a place of wonderous space and positivity and empathy and peace, and not engage in the next ego war.
It’s about being absolutely sure that you have done everything you can to keep things to yourself, to be responsible for your actions and feelings, and to live by the rule that you only treat people the way you’d like to be treated.
You’ll have to learn to love more than you ever thought was possible.
It’s a huge responsibility, but it will be liberating.
Because when you come from true peace of mind, if everything you do is born from wanting to do the right thing, you will know that you have done the best you can.
I guarantee that you will STILL find people who find you insulting in whatever way they can come up with, but at least you’ll know it’s 100% them.
It’s up to you.
What a powerful notion.
Marnix Pauwels, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Marnix Pauwels is a Dutch transformative coach and author of eight books -mostly- about mental health, living in Amsterdam with two cats. He has worked in advertising as a copywriter and Creative Director for 30 years, is a singer/songwriter and has extensive knowledge of addiction/compulsive behavior, depression, and anxiety, deepened by personal experience. Marnix has always been fascinated by what drives people, and more in particular, what drives them crazy. He’s read over 5.000 books on self-development/improvement, life-hacks, and spirituality viewed thousands of videos on the topics and kept on exploring the depths of the human mind and how to navigate our psychological storms with grace and respect. As a transformative coach, Marnix has helped thousands of people find a more playful, exciting, creative, and liberated life, living from a clear mind and a deep trust in their personal resilience. Marnix is a curious world traveler who loves to meet new people, write, wonder, and keep fit and happy.
