Embracing Midlife is a Woman’s Key to a Transformative Second Half of Life
- Jun 22, 2021
- 5 min read
Written by: Dr. Ann Moir-Bussy, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
As a coach and therapist, I talk to many women moving towards mid-life or making the transition through menopause into the afternoon of life. So many acknowledge that they feel confused as they approach this transition. Physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally, they are being challenged.
There are ways to change this.
The noise that holds us back.
Women struggle with many challenges at mid-life – menopause, life changes, kids leaving home, and many external distracting factors. On the global level, the challenge and fear of the pandemic continue to loom over us, and so many outer voices almost drown out the deep inner voice that is stirring within, particularly at this stage of mid-life.
The outer voices won't be still in the here and listen. So, instead, they continue to cry – "Let's go back to normal," "Let's get this over with," or as someone said to me recently, "I just put things on hold and then distract myself."
Social media shouts the need for instant gratification, denial, use of band-aids. One radio station that plays classical music constantly interrupts the music with announcements of what is yet to come: "In 5 to 10 minutes you can hear this," or, "in half an hour you will be delighted with the song that is coming." It's always advocating for something more, something in the future. It is never encouraging listeners to be in the present.
What has happened to the message of being in the here and now, being present, and embracing the moment that is?
Ways to transform yourself in mid-life:
Be present to yourself and take the time. Be aware and notice what is happening within you. Stop thinking too much. John Kabat Zinn, the master of mindfulness, once said, "Your awareness is a very big space within which to reside. It's never not an ally, a friend, a sanctuary".
Become aware that you are pregnant again. No longer to give physical birth but to give birth to the divine feminine within. You are a woman who has gained experience, wisdom, knowledge and given so much to family, career, relationships. Now is the time to nurture your own inner life and allow yourself to give birth to the creativity, the new and emerging ideas waiting to flourish.
Nurture the masculine and the feminine within. In the morning of life, much doing is the masculine out of balance. Now is the time to nurture the active sun (the masculine) and embrace more of the passive earth (the feminine) and have more time for being.
Let go of external authorities. Those voices have controlled or dominated the story of your life. As you recover your personal power, you can rewrite the narrative of your life. See experiences of your morning of life, even the traumatic ones, as an invitation to engage in greater depth with the mystery within you.
Acknowledge your inner wisdom. This means finding what is true for oneself and live it in the world. Acknowledge and own what is wanting to come into being through us.
Tune into your body and your senses. Engage again in the importance of loving and compassionate touch. Develop a genuine presence to yourself, with warmth and compassion and without judgment.
Only when you are truly present with yourself can you be genuinely present to others.
Benefits of being present and aware:
We can see beyond the immediate small things and view a larger context and horizon.
We can pull back the veil on our blinkered vision and can glimpse new and beautiful possibilities.
We can begin to see that we have the freedom to make the choices we want to make – and no longer be imprisoned by others' expectations of us.
Being present enables us to hear and respond to the invitation to join the conversation with our inner world.
In presence, we are enabled to engage in the here and now, in the journey of our own unfolding and becoming.
Being present and aware means we are accountable for our becoming and our evolution. Look at all of creation and notice that we are the only part of it who can refuse to live out our gifts. Don’t forget the essential nature of ourselves. Don’t allow ourselves to be steamrolled, overwhelmed by others.
Just look at the destruction, the cutting down of mother nature – we must not become part of this destruction and cut ourselves down too.
Instead, join the circle of wise women, the circle of crones – the Crone being 'she who crowns her wisdom.' Be the ones who share this wisdom with those coming after us.
Mid-life calling us to go within and listen to our soul
How can the inner world communicate with us if we only live on the surface of things?
Being present and being mindful and aware generates a new energy for ourselves, and we can then enjoy the wonders of the moment. If you had the experience of being pregnant when you were much younger, you might remember the wonder and awe as this tiny new life within you began to grow and develop. Bring this same wonder to the developing creativity and possibilities emerging as you transit through menopause and into the afternoon of life.
How do I know this? Because at mid-life, I found myself in a dark place and didn't know which way to turn. Only when I took the hand of a guide and became still and present to myself and listened with love and compassion to the inner voice, I discovered the beautiful possibilities that were waiting in the afternoon of life and how to transform the morning's experiences into gold for the afternoon.
Take that first step!
Dr. Ann Moir-Bussy, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
The rich life experience of Dr. Ann Moir-Bussy spans decades of missionary work, teaching, counseling, transformative life coaching, consulting, and becoming a best-selling author.
She worked in schools across Australia and, in particular, in Indigenous schools in the Northern Territory and also trained Chinese students in Hong Kong in counseling and psychology. The founder and editor of the Asia Pacific Journal of Counselling and Psychotherapy, Ann, became an editor of the Australian Counselling Research Journal and editor of the Australian Journal of Clinical Hypnotherapy and Hypnosis.
During a life of transitions and transformations to now conscious aging, Ann now brings her dedication and zest to guide women, in particular, to discover renewed clarity, purpose, and direction as they embrace their powerful feminine wisdom and intuition in their afternoon of life. Through her programs, podcasts, coaching, and writing, Ann enables women to develop a strong spiritual leadership that brings transformation in their life, work, and world.
