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Why Your Leadership Skills Aren't Working in Love And How to Change That

  • Mar 11, 2025
  • 4 min read

Lorii Abela is a board-certified master NLP practitioner, success coach, soulmate expert, and professional matchmaker. She specializes in assisting successful executives who feel lonely, frustrated, and burnt out from online dating.

Executive Contributor Lorii Abela

Outside of your love life, you have it all together. You know how to lead. You've built successful companies, negotiated high-stakes deals, and made tough decisions that have impacted entire industries. So, why does your methodological approach doesn't work in dating? If you're tired of the endless cycle of dates that go nowhere and are ready to find a romantic partner who genuinely complements your life, it's time to rethink your strategy. Get guidance from soulmate expert and matchmaker Lorii Abela, and start making your love life as successful as your career.


The photo shows a professionally dressed man and woman sitting at a bar, engaging in a friendly and lively conversation.

Suppose you're a middle-aged, elite, single, and in a position of power navigating the dating world. Somehow, you've probably noticed that what makes you successful in business doesn't always guarantee success in love. The same decisiveness and strategic thinking that has propelled your career can sometimes create roadblocks in your relationships. You're used to calling the shots, but romance doesn't follow a business plan.

 

How do you find the balance, then? How do you lead without dominating, stay confident without being overbearing, and build a meaningful connection without treating it like a transaction?

 

Making sure control doesn't become a problem


In business, control is a necessity. You set your vision, make the tough calls, and ensure everything runs smoothly. In essence, there's no room for uncertainty or inefficiency. In relationships, though, that level of control can feel less like confidence and more like rigidity.

 

You might find yourself initiating things, steering the conversations, and making the decisions because that's what you do best. At first, that can be attractive. Most women are into leadership and decisiveness. Nevertheless, if there's no room for collaboration over time, it can feel like a one-person show.

 

On the other hand, you could have had a few failed relationships, and you've decided to keep your personal life at arm's length. You don't have time for emotional guesswork, so you approach dating like another business venture: efficient, goal-oriented, and detached.

 

Neither of these approaches leads to the kind of deep, fulfilling connection you're looking for.

 

Shifting from power to partnership


The good news is that the skills that make you successful in business are still valuable in relationships; you, however, apply them differently.

 

Think about how task delegation works. A strong leader doesn't micromanage; he trusts his team. The same principle applies to dating. Instead of planning every detail, ask her what she wants. Let her take the lead sometimes. Relationships are about shared experiences, not all about efficiency.

 

How about communication? You already know that listening is key to any negotiation, but in relationships, it's not just about gathering information but understanding. If you immediately jump in with solutions or steer the conversation back to something you can control, pause. Listen not just to respond but also to hear the woman's words mindfully.

 

Next, let's talk about vulnerability. In business, showing uncertainty can be seen as a weakness. In relationships, it's the opposite. Women don't want a man who has every answer, every time. They want someone confident enough to be authentic. That doesn't mean oversharing or losing your edge. It just means allowing space for a solid connection rather than keeping everything at the surface level.

 

Are you getting in your way?


If your relationships tend to start strong but then fizzle out, it's worth asking yourself: Are you leading, or are you controlling? Are you present, or are you distracted? Are you creating a relationship or expecting someone to fit into your already-built life?


If dating has started to feel like an endless cycle of first dates with no real traction, the problem isn't a lack of options; it's an approach that might need some refining. In business, the most brilliant move isn't to struggle alone; it's to bring in an expert.

 

If you're ready to stop guessing and start dating with strategy and intention, it's time to work with a professional who understands your lifestyle and ambitions. The right relationship isn't just about meeting someone; it's about building something extraordinary together.

 

Stop. Start taking action now! Get expert guidance and find a partner who matches your drive and vision. Schedule a consultation with soulmate expert Lorii Abela today. 


Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info!

Read more from Lorii Abela

Lorii Abela, Soulmate Expert and Professional Matchmaker

Lorii Abela is a board-certified master NLP practitioner, success coach, soulmate expert, and professional matchmaker. She specializes in assisting successful executives who feel lonely, frustrated, and burnt out from online dating. Lorii's approach not only saves them time but also brings happiness by guiding them into the right mindset, resulting in meeting quality, relationship-oriented matches 93% of the time. As a five-time international bestselling author, her debut book, "Sexy Secrets to a Juicy Love Life," has garnered acclaim. Lorii is a dynamic TV host and producer of "Matchmaker Secrets," "Ready, Jetset, Go!," and "Scale Up." These shows air on CAN TV Chicago, Roku, and Firestick.

This article is published in collaboration with Brainz Magazine’s network of global experts, carefully selected to share real, valuable insights.

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