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Building Self-Confidence With Self-Love – Exclusive Interview With Sue Reid

Sue Reid is a Jay Shetty certified life coach, writer, and podcast host from the UK. She specialises in developing a strong sense of self-confidence with a particular focus on self-love in her coaching practice, Sue Reid Coaching.


Sue is the author of ‘Building Confidence: How to Thrive as a Shy Person’ and hosts the weekly podcast ‘Building Confidence,’ where she discusses a diverse range of topics around confidence with her guests.


Having rebuilt her self-confidence after leaving a toxic marriage, Sue realised that self-love is the foundation stone in self-confidence and one’s approach to life. Sue feels that her mission is to guide others to open their hearts to let in more love, strengthen their self-confidence and help to spread the joy of living across the world.

photo of Sue Reid

Sue Reid, Confidence Coach


Tell us about you and your life so that we can get to know you better.


Well, I have always lived in the UK, and in England to be exact. I was very shy when I was young with little self-confidence. School was a difficult time for me due to my shyness and insecurities.


Unfortunately, I made some bad life choices when I was young and that led to a seven-year-long toxic marriage which left me feeling numb. When it was over, any self-confidence and self-worth I might have had were diminished. At this point, I knew that I could either stay in a victim mentality, or I could sort my life out. With the determination that I was never going to be hurt again, I decided to build my resilience and self-confidence.


I did marry again to a beautiful man this time. We have been married now for 25 years. Although school was not an institution I found easy to fit into, I have always loved learning. I retired from a very successful career in finance in 2019. Which tells me there is always hope for everyone.


Can you give us an overview of your coaching and how you are helping your clients?


Yes of course. I believe that confidence is a skill that anyone can learn, practice and master.

The first step is to build the foundation of self-confidence and that, for me, is self-love. Until you love yourself, you will never feel that anyone else could love you either. I know that I did not love myself for a long time.


I guide my clients to realise that they are worthy of love by helping them to acknowledge everything they have already achieved in their lives. They have nothing to prove to anyone when they learn to accept themselves just the way they are. We are all human, we have all made mistakes and gone down the wrong path at times. There is always a way back. Although we can never change what is done, we can always change what is to be done.


I have a step-by-step framework that involves looking at how my client feels about different areas of their life now and what they would ideally want those areas to look like. I use a ‘Wheel of Life’ tool to assist with this.


From here we can look at what obstacles stand in the way. Many of these will be the limiting beliefs that hold us back. If you like, the ‘weeds’ that need to be pulled out of the garden to make room for new seeds to grow. Once the ground is cleared, we can work on actionable steps that will open the path to transformation.


That said, each session is a space for my client to explore anything that is an issue at that point. As we move forward, old beliefs inevitably come up ready to be released. It is quite fascinating at times.


Who are your target audience?


I mainly work with women who are looking to improve their self-confidence in their personal and professional lives. I am happy to work with men too.


My clients work on confidence issues relating to life changes, imposter syndrome, social anxiety, relationship breakups, body image and many others.


Do you have any notable stories of how you have been able to help clients with their self-confidence?


I see my greatest achievement as my work with a young graduate who, although talented, was unsure of herself and suffering from imposter syndrome. After working with her for 6 months, she was already on-stage public speaking.


I have been able to help many women finally lose weight after years of trying by changing the relationship that they have with food rather than giving them yet another restrictive diet.


What values guide how you approach your coaching?


I use the Association for Coaching global code of ethics to ensure I maintain good and ethical standards of behaviour. It is important to me to treat my clients as individuals and respect where they are on their journey.


I believe my client already has all the resources they need for their transformation to happen. My role is to guide and facilitate that change by providing a safe space to talk.


Simply put, I see my clients journey as a path from point A to point B and I am the bridge that gets them there.


What goals do you have for the future of Sue Reid Coaching?


My goals are to continue helping people with their self-confidence through 1on1 coaching, writing and my podcast.


In 2024, I aim to start a YouTube channel, develop online courses and workshops online but also in my local community. I feel this will enable me to help more people via different avenues. I also plan to write more books.


Your background is in finance, how did you come to coaching?


The part of my job that I loved most involved meeting people and helping them with their money. When I retired, I mixed my love of helping people with my experience of building my own confidence and that seemed to me a great way to be able to continue to be of service to the world.


You went through a toxic marriage, what lessons did you learn?


I believe that any trauma we go through enables us to learn a lesson. When I met my first husband I was already in a bad relationship, and he helped me get out of it. Unfortunately, I was jumping out of the frying pan into the fire. I can see with hindsight that I had no boundaries and was letting myself be used. So, the lesson I learned is how important it is to know your core values and to set healthy boundaries around them. This is an important part of my coaching method.


What advice would you give to anyone who wants to boost their self-confidence?


Start by doing something small that challenges your confidence without sending you into a panic attack. This could be as little as smiling at a stranger every day for a week. From there you could try saying hello or just starting a conversation with someone. Celebrate every little win. Because if you achieve it one day, you can achieve it another day. Then you try something else and keep moving forward from there. The important part is to keep pushing out the edge of your comfort zone. Do that and you will be surprised how quickly your self-confidence improves.


How can readers find out more about you?


The best place to find me is via my Linktree where you will find my social media links, website and latest articles. I also write on Medium.com Sue Reid – Medium


Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info!

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