Written by: Kamladevi Sharma, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
More often than expected, leaders have approached me to ask, “How do you do it? How can you be so positive and focused? How are you unaffected by people’s attitudes, especially when they are trying to attack you?”
The truth is, leadership is a challenging experience, and it can be very lonely dealing with it. This version of myself was not always alive. There were times when I used to feel the competitive energy of co-workers, and I felt trapped by it because they were hiding behind a smile. There were times when an employee’s ‘not knowing better’ used to upset my flow and focus for hours, and times when I felt like giving up because people and processes were not aligning with my vision and desires as fast as the situation needed them to.
These were all times I was building my resilience and confidence unknowingly. The moment I got conscious of what upsets my inner balance, the easier it got to deal with them- saving my own time and energy and making me super creative and productive. There were icebreaking moments where I chose to challenge my inner resistance to experience a different outcome, and this is what I now advise leaders to do:
1. Celebrate other’s wins as if they were your own.
When others win, celebrate- including those who are competing with you! Competition is healthy for creativity and innovation. Competition which brings out jealousy, insecurity, and ill feelings within you is unhealthy for you, not your competitor. If you feel the ‘feels,’ challenge yourself to say or do something positive for that person. The more you challenge yourself in this way, the easier it will become for you to stay focused on your achievements and opportunities for growth. Getting caught up on “who is better than who” consumes time and energy that can be directed to innovating or creating solutions that will benefit you, your team, and your company altogether. Plus, the more you celebrate other’s wins, the faster you dissolve insecurity and subconsciously train yourself to feel and be confident in what you are doing and where you are headed in your life.
2. Praise your team as people praise you.
It’s easy to lose yourself in the recognition, and praise others give you as you continue to be successful as a leader. Even if it was your amazing just-in-time idea that brought home the prize, be humble and recognize the effort of your team. A leader who alienates his team in such situations distances himself from those persons and actually makes it harder to maintain their cooperation for the next team project. So when you feel other’s praises are inflating your ego and you want to get carried away in those spotlight moments, remember those who helped to make you shine and praise them too. It’ll improve your team’s communication, motivation, and productivity.
3. Recognize other’s cynical remarks and address them.
The office is one of the most diverse places to be in. Some persons are cultured to negativity without delivering any meaningful results, and this can be an uncomfortable experience for a leader to address without being accused of discrimination. It is critical in these experiences that you recognize your value and speak about them. If you are focused on solutions and problem-solving, communicate that. Be so confident in who you are and what you are about that intolerable behaviors are known by those around you. Not in a disempowering disengaging way, but as simple as, “Let’s talk about what we can do differently to improve our results rather than criticize, judge, or mock what we are doing.”
4. Communicate your imperfections.
It takes a great deal of courage to admit that you made a mistake or you were wrong, or you are weak in a specific area as a leader. However, being vulnerable actually helps to improve your connection with your team. It reflects your authenticity, humility, and ability to engage in real humane conversations with your team. So lead by communicating your imperfections to keep them real in the office and inspire others to keep striving for success. To note, though, if you feel incompetent as a leader by sharing your weaknesses, then you have to address your low self-worth in that capacity.
The inner challenges of a leader can be overwhelming and uncomfortable to deal with. Still, once you make it your goal to lead authentically and focus on growth opportunities, you will have the impact and influence you need to align people and processes.
Kamladevi Sharma, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Kamladevi Sharma is an international speaker on work-life balance, a certified professional life coach, and a qualified business consultant. She helps entrepreneurs and people in management globally, including you, to eliminate burnout and achieve balance in their personal and professional lives. Her dedication to achieving clarity, alignment, and results for her clients ensures that they can thrive and feel more fulfilled and successful in their lives, careers, and/or businesses. Additionally, her expertise in mindset and personal development strategy has benefitted over 4000 professionals globally in personal growth. Over 250 businesses have jumped start a momentum for success in her signature momentum training at Revive, and she has been featured on several podcasts on Spotify, Apple, and Google. A known feature in magazines locally and internationally, Kamladevi holds an MBA in Business Administration from the University of Bradford, Bachelors in Social Psychology, Social Research, and Business, and certificates in Professional Life Coaching and Counselling. Prior to co-founding Revive, she was in upper management positions in Guyana and lectured at several tertiary institutions.
