top of page

How To Build Emotional Intimacy When Dating

Written by: Monica Braun, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.


Emotional connection is the key to fulfillment in relationships... It all begins with self-awareness and understanding regarding what you need in a partner. Being conscious of what you need will help you to make empowered decisions that will lead you toward the person that is right for you.. This is where emotional intimacy can take form and thrive.

Step 1- Ask Yourself Intentional Questions to Uncover Your Deeper Needs

What do you need in a partner to feel emotionally safe?

What do you need in a partner to encourage you to stand confidently within your authentic self?

What do you need in a partner to become your best self?

Step 2- Begin Dating

I recommend going on as many dates as possible and keeping your heart, mind, and eyes wide open. Through dating, you will uncover and clarify what you truly need in a partner. With each date, you will move closer to finding a partner with who you can emotionally connect with.

Step 3- Evaluate Your Dates and Whether They Meet Your Emotional Needs

Below are some of the most important qualities that women and men need in a partner and ways to evaluate if they embody these characteristics.

  • Non-judgemental/Accepting- What questions are they asking you? Do they criticize you? Do they allow the past/present to be as is?

  • Empathy- Do they have service careers? Pets? Are they close to family and friends?

  • Emotional Intelligence- Do they listen? Do they ask questions about you? Can they admit when they make a mistake?

  • Vulnerability- Do they share personal qualities about themselves?

  • Supportive- Do they ask questions about your job? Do they validate and affirm you by building you up?

  • Confidence/Authenticity- Do they talk about their flaws? Do they disagree with you politely to demonstrate their perspective?

  • Humility- Can they admit when they make a mistake? Are they aware of their shortcomings?

Many of these questions can be sprinkled into the conversations and discovered naturally, with time.

To make sure you are on the right path, check in with your emotional barometer. How do you feel when you are with them? It should feel like an unlayering of one another, much like an onion, shedding layer after layer, allowing all of the superficial distractions to fall off, in order to be left with the authentic self. A relationship that will uncover these deeper truths will lead you to grow together and inspire you to be yourself freely leading to a joy-filled partnership.

Dating is a process to become acquainted with someone more intimately. Take your time and discern. If it is not a fit, don’t be afraid to move on. Try to be patient. The path is meant to unravel before you step by step and moment by moment. With divine timing as your guide, nothing that is meant for you will pass you by.

Follow Monica on her Facebook and visit her website for more info.


Monica Braun, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Monica Braun is an international relationship coach. After being single for several years, she created strategies to transform her personal life from single to soulmate and is now happily married with a growing family. She has since created and implemented a program for other singles to attract a Spiritual and Emotional Companion through the Intentional Dating Process. She is the founder of Soul to Soul Coaching which includes personalized dating experiences that has helped several single clients become engaged and married. She has written the book “From Toxic to Soulmate Love,” a number 1 best seller on Amazon, and has dedicated her life to helping others attract the love of their lives.



  • linkedin-brainz
  • facebook-brainz
  • instagram-04


bottom of page