Healing From Divorce is The New Black
- Jul 2, 2020
- 4 min read
Updated: Jul 26, 2024
Written by Ellva Chanchal, Divorce Coach
Ellva is the owner and founder of Healing with Ellva. Ellva is a Brisbane based coach, helping women world wide to heal from their divorce.
I knew a girl who lived in Sydney, and she was always in her own mind. She was so focused on her future and always in a rush wherever she went. One morning she had her headphones on listening to her morning tunes (think: Kesha -Tik Tok), and she was, as always, rushing to get wherever she was going, so she wasn’t focusing on what she was doing. Walking to the beat of the song, she failed to notice that the ground was wet because of rain, and out of nowhere she slips and falls. In the middle of Sydney. Right on the pavement.
No one came to help her. She started to get mad, angry and frustrated, she thought, what is wrong with everyone? She wondered why no came to check on her, and she wondered what the people around her were thinking. Do I have to get up all by myself? do I have to figure this out all on my own and am I ok to get up on my own? She didn’t understand how she could’ve fallen, and she was so shaken by the fall that her worth, value and esteem crumbled.
She had no choice but to get up all by herself, and she did, slowly stumbling, confused and disappointed that no one came to rescue. When she got up, she decided not to let this bother her for the rest of her day. She made sure to walk more carefully and not to go through the same humiliating situation again.
During her day she met some beautiful people, she walked through a garden and saw some fantastic art in the art gallery. After a while, she became tired from all the walking so she decided it was time to go back home. She went to the nearest train station to catch the train back home and she got to a set of stairs to walk up to the platform to catch her train. Placing her hands on the railing, she started to climb the stairs and it happened. Again. She fell.
- what the, not again.
And then, suddenly, her mind switched. Something changed.
- NO, I am not going to let this happen again. I get to decide who I want to be. I get to decide how I react. I get to decide how I grow from this experience.
No one needs to help me up anymore. She got up, turned around, put her hand on the railing and walked up every single step to the platform.
The girl in the story is me. I was in my mid 20´s going through a divorce, and it felt like my entire life was one big, giant fall. A fall that I couldn´t get back up from. It felt like I needed people to help me create the life that I wanted and that I didn’t see the power I had within myself to create the life I wanted.
The shame, regret, resentment, rage and every other negative emotion that comes up when you fall down from a divorce are emotions that I have had to feel through and it was one of the most traumatic experiences that I had ever gone through. However, I got to decide who I wanted to be, if I don’t want to live with the label of being separated or divorced, I don’t have to wear them. The labels we choose to put on ourselves don’t have to define us, because we are so much bigger than a label that society tells us to wear.
This is why I am a divorce coach.
During COVID-19, I designed a healing program to help women heal, reconnect and form a relationship deeper with themselves. This program also helps them to break the relationship patterns. Women don’t have to repeat a cycle of abuse, control, manipulation, be lied to, or create codependency in their next relationship.
My breakthrough programs are already achieving success around the world and here are some beautiful words from my clients:
“Ellva was able to get rid of unwanted emotions and limiting beliefs that held me and kept me stuck; our sessions have been transformational and healing. Ellva helped me dig to the root causes and resolve the issues.”
“After one session, I feel happy again. My anger is completely gone.”
We can choose to create a reality that ends in divorce, and I have been there. I get that, and it sucked. However, that experience gave me the lessons I needed to heal myself and help women around the world heal. If that experience didn’t happen to me, I wouldn’t be running a successful business that empowers women to heal.
At the end of the day, if you can attract someone that didn’t love you, respect you, trust you, disrespected and demean you, controlled, manipulated, lied to you, and made you feel angry, resentful, and sad. You have the same ability to create what you do want, and my program dives deep into the unconscious mind of my clients and gets to the root cause of their negative emotions and limitations that they are living by so they learn the lessons they need to.
You are worthy and deserving to get up and walk up those steps and onto the platform and live the life you have always wanted.
Connect with Healing with Ellva via Facebook and book a coaching call today
Ellva is the owner and founder of Healing with Ellva. Ellva is a Brisbane based coach, helping women world wide to heal from their divorce. Ellva is a Master Practitioner in Nero-Linguistics Programming, Time Line Therapy®️, hypnosis and coaching. Ellva is a Master level in Reiki. Ellva lives everyday with purpose to serve women and empower them to heal from their negative emotions and beliefs, so they can create the best relationship with themselves and those around them.
