Your Job And Life Purpose – Who I Want To Be, What I Want To Do – Part 5
- Aug 6, 2023
- 6 min read
Written by: David Lutes, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Call it your ‘dream career or job,’ your ‘wish list’ or ‘bucket list,’ your life’s hope – or a mutation, realization, or evolution of what you said, at age 7, that you wanted to be when you grow up. Wherever you are now or however you got ‘here,’ Motivation and Aspiration are part of who you are.
Admiration of a folk or superhero, a sport’s superstar, your father or mother or someone who seems to have or can do the kinds of things you desire as well – your Motivation to want to be or want to do can be like a seed of fire planted, ‘embering’, and growing inside you.
Difficult to define exactly, but you may call it a want to do and want to be ‘Hunger’. You can’t shake the feeling, that nudging going on inside your heart or soul… And a bell or light comes on from time to time – even now when you may be reasonably happy and successful – that there is something ‘calling’ you to be and do more. To get to grips with this possible restless stirring inside you, you need to be even more honest when you look into your heart’s mirror. You need to Know Yourself even more – deeper and more meaningfully – with more intention and focus. New career beginnings and direction – with longer lasting purpose, begins when we come to terms with your track record of those times when you have succeeded – and failed – at being and doing (or trying) what you truly wanted to be and do.
Inner searching
Here’s a partial checklist to help guide your self-assessment and inner soul-searching on this aspect of your ‘Career Wholeness’ journey.
Remember, we’re looking at your Motivations and defining your Aspirations – some of those things that define how and why you do some things and act in certain ways…and more important, how this affects your work and career choices and planning.
1. What is your definition of ‘drive’, ‘determination’, ‘ambition’, ‘success’, ‘good enough’, ‘winning’, ‘respected’, ‘admired’, ‘acceptable’, etc.
e.g., Do you have a mental or ‘secret’ list of others whom you admire and wish you could be like because they have done something, or are someone you wish you could also do or be like?
Complete the sentence…
“I’ve always wanted to be____________________ or to do ____________________.”
Are there any of the words/terms in No. 1 that you believe you have an absolutely clear and unshakable understanding and belief in – in terms of what it means?
e.g., “I absolutely know what ‘Success’ and ‘Winning’ mean for me in my life and career…!” “You don’t need to tell me about Drive and Determination…I invented the concepts…and people know to get out of my way when I am intent on doing my thing…” “I won’t rest until I’m one of the most Respected people in my field.”
2. Are you a risky, risk-free, reckless, rational, calculated, impulsive choice/decision-maker; passive, aggressive, cautious?
e.g., What are your ‘BE’ and ‘DO’ boundaries and limits? How far you prepared to go – or not go – to achieve your goals? What does your own ‘choice track record’ tell you about your respect for and the honoring of those boundaries and limits?
I don’t want ‘just a job’!
3. What are your courage levels, and in what contexts?
e.g., When you begin to come terms with the challenge in this and the previous sections, you no doubt realize that some difficult decisions about your career journey choices may need to be made. The extent to which you know yourself and can believe in your uniqueness will only matter if you combine it all together with a courageous first, and second step. Only you can know how far to step.
4. How do you overcome or deal with ‘internal’ conflicts and dilemmas?
e.g., Because of ethics, challenge to your values, interpersonal disagreement, conscience wrestling, when no option is perfect, etc., that may impact or affect difficult/hard decisions you may need to make?
5. What is the hardest part about being true to your personal values and beliefs while trying to achieve your career and life goals?
e.g., Give up and let go of ‘it’? Deep bravery breath and step out of the boat? Forget the past, take a chance, and move ahead? Some sacrifice is ok for a long-term return. Family’s well-being comes first – no debate. If in doubt, then don’t.
Courage and conflict
6. What Scares you? I don’t mean horror movies, flying in an airplane, speaking in public, spiders, or your mother-in-law. I’m referring to those things in life that prevent you from taking ‘that next step’ into the dark or unknown – launching out into, what is for you, unchartered territory.
For example…
Situations where you might not have or will lose control of the process or outcome
Times when you might be exposed or embarrassed
Being wrong or misunderstood
Losing the love or respect of people that matter to you or you care about
Miscalculating/making an empirical error or mistake
Trusting your gut
7. What Inspires you? It’s not just or only about fireworks going off in your heart and mind, or about finding yourself tearfully grinning with new insight or focus; or discovering that something someone said or did to raise your spiritual or emotional vision or perception. It can be all those things…but also maybe much more – and different.
Hope, purpose, sense of destiny or calling – new courage, bravery to defend, protect, serve – or determination to carry on, try something new, branch out, take a chance, risk something you would not normally risk, being for someone else what they need at a special moment in time, etc.
It’s a good thing, a worthy habit, to intentionally and purposefully make a note of those people, experiences, events, and words that come into your life and lifts your sights and takes you beyond your own self-interests and ego. What are they? Who are they?
The emphatic ‘absolutely’! factor.
8. What Compels you? Following on from ‘What Inspires you?’ above, a Compulsion to be, do or try something is bit like Values + Inspiration combined with Drive and Determination. Also, following on from the earlier Part Two article, what it boils down to is when your MUST BE / MUST DO is taken to another level and degree – but is ‘exclamation marked’ an emphatic ABSOLUTELY! Some may call you obsessive or even fanatical, but whatever it is, when it grabs you, takes root in you – and you see the value and purpose of it, you can be unstoppable.
For some it’s a life-changing, earth-stopping and expectation-shattering defining moment and choice that lets you record your 15 minutes of fame in some way, or an historical narrative. For others, it’s ‘duty exponential’ – something as simple yet as vitally important as, “If I don’t do this…my children won’t have food on the table…it’s my glad and willing choice. “I am compelled because it’s right and good to do…it’s that simple!”
If you have been in or know someone who served in the military, first-responder, or emergency services – then you will know something of duty and honor-purposed compulsion that is seldom equaled.
9. Have you ever had to ‘Snatch Victory from the Jaws of Defeat’’?
How close a call was it?
Was it your own definition of ‘victory’/’defeat’ or someone else’s?
Was it a win-win, win-lose result?
What motivated or compelled you to do this?
What did you learn about yourself?
Is what you learned desirable, ‘learnable’ and/or repeatable?
10. Have you ever had to make a ‘Comeback’? In what context? How tough or how easy was it? Why?
These critically important questions and the challenges that come with them will be the subject of future articles. In the meantime…
“Be brave enough to try something new and suck at it.” (Paraphrased from Jon Acuff)
David Lutes, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
David Lutes is a global talent management, organizational development and leadership coach, consultant and trainer. A former church pastor, he is radically and passionately committed to helping people discover their meaning, purpose and direction for their life and career. He has been described as a 'gift and latent skill detector and developer', as he helps people and the organizations they work in discover the wealth and richness within their people.
