Written by: Zofia Slowik, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Having a solid relationship with yourself is the best relationship that you will ever have. Once it’s built, it never leaves you. It plays a very important role in your life, it gives a foundation for any other relationship that you form. There is no difference between a relationship that you have with yourself and a relationship that you have with other people. It’s always a reflection of everything that is going on between you and you.
If you found yourself in the middle of your single season and you are not sure how you feel about it, this article will help you realise how lucky, blessed, chosen, and gifted you are as a single woman right now. This is the best time of your life, whether you already know it or not. I have been single for a long time, even when I thought I wasn’t. There were times when I dated a lot and nothing ever worked out. I remember I had forced myself into thinking that I preferred to be single out of convenience. I was working too much, I travelled every second month, I was convinced that I had so much on my plate already. However, over that time I had moments or rather weekends when I felt almost ‘hungry’ for other human intimacy, not just sex but also getting attention, having a distraction, having a way of escaping from the reality, and filling the void that I wasn’t aware of. This was the repetitive pattern that I accepted. It’s been years later since I realised that it was time for a change, for the internal change, between me and me. I was ready to face myself and see what was going on beneath the surface. I was tired of my old way of living on all fronts. Changing careers and taking an unconventional path after years of professional experience in the corporate world, was one of those triggers that made me realise that I can make a change in every area of my life, not only in careers, not only in fitness but also in the romantic department. There is no limit other than what we think the limit is. The change I needed to make was ME. I knew I had to reinvent myself, to remind myself who I am. The loss of my identity was hitting me hard, there was so much deep work to be done on rewiring the belief system that kept me stuck. The best way I could do that for myself was to change my entire environment, go away travelling, do deep soul searching, try things I’ve never tried before, do jobs that I never thought I would do, make money without stress and a rat race and really be in a moment of the self-exploration journey. The key to my breakthrough was getting back to my childhood passions, I started dancing again, stretching again, exploring my feminine energy, and becoming a new version of myself. It’s been an incredible journey.
However it was not always that exciting, I had my dark moments, fearful moments where I made serious mistakes along the way, times I self-sabotaged myself I cannot even count, I was losing my self-belief and getting it back again and again and every time, I brought myself back to my inner knowing, self-trust and my crazy playful self. This is the truth, you have everything that you need within you, but you have to decide to GO FOR IT. It is you being you, nobody else, it’s you owning who you are, what you do, what you choose for yourself, how you stand up for yourself, how you respect yourself, how you own your voice, how you carry yourself, what you create and what you express. It is you expressing who you are at your core and rocking with it. This is the game-changer. A lot of people try to figure out how to do this or that, how to be better at something, but the answer is simple, you need yourself more and your self-confidence that whatever you decide is happening. It’s about breaking through all of those limiting beliefs in your head and reconnecting with your essence and flowing with it, being a badass with it, not letting anyone tell you otherwise. What you feel is good for you, it simply is. This is how you heal the unconscious void that has been controlling your life. You fully and completely accept who you are, learn how to love every piece of you, and learn how to polish your gifts and hidden talents. You commit to your own evolution and you apply that to every area of your life. It takes time, energy, money, and space to execute and do that deep work on yourself, but it is worth it. It is life-changing, it allows you to live your fullest expression, free of any external pressure, free of your autopilot old behaviours. This is your commitment to yourself that builds everything that you want to have in your life. This is the work that brings joy, freedom, happiness, fulfilment, a direction in your life, and attraction to whatever you desire. New jobs, new ideas, new paths, new transformations, new feelings, new you, new people because you make choices out of what’s true to you. Nobody else has a say but YOU. What does it mean? It means investing in your wellbeing with ALL YOU HAVE, investing in your emotional and mental health, investing in your physical health, investing time, energy, and money in your mind, body, and your soul expression. This is how you level up your life on all fronts acquiring the ability to manifest anything you want in your life, by clearing the old dirt, becoming a better version of yourself, raising your vibrations, changing your thoughts, choosing new feelings, creating new energy therefore new miracles in your life. You being single right now has its purpose. It’s a sign for you to choose yourself, reinvent yourself, rebuild your new identity, explore your passions and dreams, set new goals, make new plans, and let go of everything from your past that has been controlling you. Choosing yourself means choosing freedom.
True freedom comes down to emotional freedom, how you feel inside, how you feel about yourself and your life, and how excited you are to contribute to the world by being YOURSELF.
What matters the most is you being here right now, making a new decision and starting over, deeply trusting the process of knowing yourself and your own wisdom.
Ask yourself this:
What is it that you need to let go of to be able to step into the next dimension of your life? Is it a belief, is it an old habit, or is it the outside pressure that you are fighting against?
Write it down. You got this.
Zofia Slowik, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Zofia Slowik, B.Sc, is a Single Women Empowerment Coach, certified in Wellness and Holistic Health Coaching. After leaving the corporate world and going through her personal heartbreak, she decided to go on a mission of empowering other women to never settle for less than they deserve. She now helps high achieving single women rebuild their relationships with themselves, reconnect with their self-worth and focus their energy on the creation and manifestation of their dream lives.
