Written by: Amber Stephenson, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
How are your 2020 resolutions going? Did you smash them – or are you pretending you never made any?
If you’re in the 2nd camp, don’t worry – you’re not alone.
According to an article by Forbes in 2018, only 8% of people accomplish their New Year’s resolutions – and I’m not one of them.
My resolution for 2020 was to pay off my family’s debt, which isn’t going to happen this year.
I’ve learned a lot about goal-setting, and I want to share that with you so I can be a part of the 8% (together, we can raise this number in 2021).
A lot of people these days swear by the SMART goal setting system, and it’s great – as far as it goes. But before we can actually start setting goals, there are a few things to consider.
The first is the most important one to answer.
What do YOU want?
I’m not asking what you think you should be doing or what you’ve been told to accomplish. I don’t care what other people want my life to be (and you shouldn’t either).
I want to know what YOU want.
This really is square one of goal-setting – and most people are already lost at this point.
They’re lost in other people’s opinions and desires.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t live my life for other people, not even my family.
I live my life for me.
So before you start thinking about what’s specific or measurable – ask yourself what you really want because that is so much more motivating than trying to please someone else.
Maybe you want to pay off some debt, or lose some weight, or get a promotion.
Maybe you want regular trips to the masseuse, a wardrobe you love, or more time for the things you really enjoy, like art.
All of these are valid goals, but let’s take it a step further – because when we dream big, we need lots of motivation.
Remember when I said I wanted to pay off my family’s debt? I chose that because of the freedom it would give me.
To buy a kickass wardrobe.
To send my kids to daycare.
To not have to worry about whether they would be enough money to pay the bills.
To start saving for dream house.
To have money for emergencies.
To never have to check my bank balance in a check outline.
To help my kids pay for school.
To have date nights with my husband.
Why is all of this important?
Because achieving our goals isn’t going to be sunshine and rainbows all the time – there will be storms.
And when those clouds roll in, we need to remember why we’re doing this in the first place. This is what keeps us moving forward when we want to quit.
Once you’ve answered these questions, you can move onto the SMART system with the confidence that you can do anything.
Within reason, which is where I failed in 2020.
And remember – you’re a beautiful goddess, and you’ve got this.
Good luck, and Happy New Year!
Amber Stephenson, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Amber Stephenson is a Master Transformational Coach who specializes in helping women who struggle to reach their goals to identify what's holding them back and shift into success. She's on a mission to empower women to be their most powerful, authentic selves while building lives they love and making their dreams come true.
Amber is a rockstar coach, a dedicated wife, mother of four, insatiable reader and avid gamer.