The Everyday Financial and Emotional Cost of Holding Ourselves Back
- Mar 9, 2021
- 4 min read
Updated: Mar 11, 2021
Written by: Mandy Napier, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Have you ever calculated the financial cost of believing certain things about yourself that hold you back?
Recently I worked with a client who said she didn’t feel smart enough to increase her income and earn a million dollars. As we dug deeper, she realized this was something she had been told when she was young.
For much of her life, she sought out experiences and evidence that matched her belief “I’m not smart enough to…”. Over time, that belief became part of her identity.
The consequences of this were huge. She worked out that it cost hundreds of thousands of dollars of lost revenue in her real estate career because she hadn’t put herself out there to go after luxury homes. Breaking this down on a weekly and monthly basis was even more sobering. Furthermore, it had cost her a loss of confidence and self-worth and brought her a certain amount of frustration and stress.
Our brains are amazing organs. Their job is to protect us at all costs. They ensure that the information we let in aligns with what we already “know” or our beliefs. These beliefs shape our identity. Moreover, the person you believe you are, influences your results in life. Your beliefs are the drivers of your success. They will either hold you back in life or help you succeed.
“It is not what you want that you attract. You attract what you believe to be true.” — Neville
With awareness, the good news is that new possibilities and opportunities open up, which give you the chance to change. Here are a few tips to help you reduce your financial and emotional debt.
1. First, for the next week, listen with curiosity to what you say. Imagine a mini-you, sitting on your shoulder, spying curiously on your self-talk. Listen for any limiting or negative statements.
2. Next, write your statements down. You should start to recognize common themes. Is your language predominantly positive and solution-focused? Are you kind to yourself? Do you champion yourself and believe in your capabilities, or are you hard on yourself? How much do you recognize your skills and attributes? Do you even know what they are?
3. When you have identified the belief statements that sit underneath your self-talk, write down your answers to the following ten questions:
Is this statement 100% true for everyone?
Do I know anyone who this doesn’t hold true for?
What does holding onto this belief do for me?
What will the cost be in ten years as a result of holding onto this belief?
What has this belief cost me in my life?
If I could let go of this belief, what could happen?
What is a new empowering belief I could adopt?
How will I act with the new belief?
How do I feel about this new belief?
Could I now adopt this new belief?
Once you’ve identified what you want your new belief to be, write this down on a card. For example, if you once believed “I am not good enough,” you might write down, “I am worthy of achieving success.”
Carry your intention card with you and read it every day until you embody it and feel connected to it. Intentions are powerful as they direct the energy of the mind towards what you want.
On the other side of your intention card, write down, “How can I allow even more success to come into my life today?” You aren’t looking for an answer. Just asking yourself that question will activate that amazing part of your brain to help you attract success into your life.
Lastly, write down your small wins because this will help you build your new belief. It gives your brain a new reference point to sort from, and you will create new, stronger neural pathways that will help cement in the new belief.
And then watch the magic happen. Let me know what magic happens in your life when you embrace this technique!
If you would like some more free Mindset Tools, you can access a FREE Mindset Essentials Toolkit here.
To connect with Mandy, visit her website and hop on over to my private Facebook Group Winning Mindsets.
Mandy Napier, Executive Contributor, Brainz Magazine
Mandy Napier is a Global High-Performance Mindset Coach, Professional Speaker, Author, Athlete and founder of Mindset for Success. With her results-driven, neuroscience-based C.L.E.A.R ™️ Coaching Model, Mandy has helped thousands of high-achieving professionals break free of their self-imposed limitations and achieve transformational results. With a focus on the ‘how-to’ change, learning how to train the mind and re-wire the brain, she helps her clients gain clarity, purpose and direction. Developing helpful habits that support consistent action is also key. Mandy is the author of ‘Creating Healthy Life Habits,’ and publishes regular articles that have been shared on global platforms and national publications. She has been featured on podcasts such as Success, Motivation and Inspiration and The Successful Advisor. Her passion is: Extraordinary Results Always For Clients!
