How To Recognize Imposter Syndrome In Others
- Brainz Magazine
- Sep 12
- 5 min read
Ever met someone who downplays their achievements or says they just got "lucky"? Learn how to spot the subtle signs of imposter syndrome and support those silently struggling with self-doubt.
Expert Panelists
1. Struggle to feel worthy
Shrinking small, avoiding authenticity, and quietly downplaying your own qualities and achievements. Stories are often rooted in early moments where love and approval felt conditional. Imposter syndrome often grows from a mindset that ties self-worth to constant achievement, turning doubt into a recurring companion. To truly help, we must see these signs not as flaws, but as protective messages from a mind trying to keep us safe.
Mindset transformation gently invites us to challenge these old stories and replace them with “I am worthy as I am.”
Supporting someone means giving them space to speak openly about their fears and lingering self-doubt, without judgment. It’s about creating an inner space for newer, kinder beliefs. Beliefs that slowly rebuild peace and authentic confidence. Because real change begins the moment we stop replaying the question “What will people think of me?” and start asking, “What do I choose to believe about myself?”
2. Luck takes the credit
Often disguising itself as humility, it actually conceals a deep sense of self-doubt. You might notice someone deflecting praise, attributing their success to luck, or insisting they “just got lucky” when recognized for their achievements. They may over-apologize for small errors, hesitate to speak up in meetings, or shy away from new opportunities because they secretly fear they’re not “good enough.” Their words, tone, and even posture (shrinking back, avoiding eye contact, or nervously laughing off compliments) can reveal a quiet inner struggle between their true capability and the false belief they don’t deserve their success.
To support someone facing imposter syndrome, be intentional in how you engage. Offer specific, evidence-based feedback. Point out exactly how their skills or actions made a difference rather than generic praise. Ask open-ended questions that help them reflect on their strengths: What do you feel most proud of in this project? What did you learn that you can build on? Most importantly, model vulnerability by sharing times when you doubted yourself and how you moved through it. When you meet their self-doubt with empathy and encouragement, you help them rewrite their inner narrative and step more fully into their brilliance.
Dr. Kapil and Rupali Apshankar, Award-Winning Board-Certified Clinical Hypnotists | Board-Certified Coaches
3. Too quick to apologize
Pay attention to their behavior, those who apologize before sharing ideas, deflect compliments like they're dodging bullets, and somehow turn every win into luck or timing. They'll downplay their expertise, while secretly knowing more than half the room. And you'll catch them frantically researching topics they already understand just to feel "ready enough" to speak. But the dead giveaway is how they attribute their failures to personal inadequacy and their successes to external factors. It's a brutal cycle where nothing they achieve actually counts as evidence of their competence.
4. Fear of being found out
Shows up when people feel their work is never good enough, fear being found out, or hold back their ideas unless they’re backed by layers of evidence. They may appear confident, but that confidence is really clothing self-doubt. A protective mask hides their true capability. Many trace this back to early conditioning of being seen but not heard, leaving them hesitant to take the lead or claim their voice. The most powerful way to support someone struggling is to encourage them when they do speak up and to back them visibly, so they know their voice is valued. In my work, I call this the process of “undressing”, helping people peel back the beliefs that keep them hiding, so they no longer need to pretend to be confident. They simply are.
5. Constant self-doubt
When someone consistently downplays their achievements, crediting luck or timing instead of their own effort. You may notice a drive for perfection paired with never feeling satisfied, alongside overpreparation born of fear of “failing in front of others.” In group settings, they’ll deflect praise, avoid taking credit, or quietly confess they feel like a fraud who “doesn’t belong.” Watching for subtle cues, such as fidgeting under compliments, harsh self-comparison to peers, or recurring self-criticism, can help you spot those silently wrestling with self-doubt. Gently acknowledging their hard work and asking validating, open-ended questions offers a safe space for them to begin owning their successes.
6. Deny their abilities
One of the most telling signs is when highly capable individuals minimize their accomplishments. They may attribute success to luck, timing, or external help, rarely acknowledging their own skill, effort, or talent.
Another indicator is language. Listen closely, people experiencing imposter syndrome often use qualifiers like “I just…”, “It wasn’t a big deal”, or “Anyone could have done it.” These small phrases reveal a deeper reluctance to own their expertise.
You may also notice patterns of overpreparation, reluctance to accept compliments, or avoidance of new opportunities because they fear being “exposed.” What looks like humility on the surface can, in fact, be rooted in self-doubt.
The most supportive step you can take is to validate their strengths. Instead of a casual “Great job,” highlight specifics as “Your research really sharpened the strategy” or “Your leadership made this project possible.” By pointing directly to their contributions, you help them build evidence that challenges the false narrative of not being enough.
Recognizing imposter syndrome in others isn’t just about spotting insecurity. It’s about creating an environment where confidence can grow and where people are encouraged to step fully into their brilliance.
7. Perfectionism
Masquerades as humility. It rarely sounds like “I don’t belong here.” More often, it slips out as “It’s no big deal,” or “You could’ve done it.”
You’ll also notice it in perfectionists who triple-check deliverables, revisit emails before hitting send, and only take action when they feel “ready,” which is almost never.
When you recognize these patterns, skip the generic reassurance (“You’re amazing!” or “Why? You did great!”). Instead, reframe and mirror their contributions. Highlight specific moments where their presence and work product created impact. Celebrate and share their wins. Offer their brain evidence that being seen doesn’t require perfection, but good intentions and meaningful effort.
8. Hides in toxic shame
We, too, feel like imposters at some point in our lives. We experience hypercritical self-doubt, fear, even terror in our bodies of being exposed and found out, and a deep sense that we will fail. All three of these symptoms are rooted in toxic shame, “I’m bad.” “I am not enough.” “Something is wrong with me.”
We can easily recognize imposter syndrome in others, precisely because most of us who have histories of developmental, relational, or other trauma ruptures have wrestled with the demon of toxic shame, often hidden in isolation. The key is to lean into another’s imposter syndrome with compassionate curiosity and embodied empathy.
The one thing toxic shame cannot withstand, according to shame expert Brene Brown, is a big dose of genuine empathy. We all know from our lived experiences when someone is fully present with us in our suffering, because they show up with empathy, and our brain and body recognize relational safety neurobiologically. And, safety is where we begin to heal and transform!
