How to Become Your Best Self
- Brainz Magazine
- May 8
- 5 min read
Updated: May 9
Gayatri is unique as she combines 30 years of training and teaching since 2012 into everything she does.
My work is to help people heal themselves and ultimately to become the best version of themselves. What does this look like? Becoming your best self isn’t about perfection. It’s about growth, showing up for yourself daily, embracing your potential, and living with intention. The journey is personal, ever-evolving, and deeply rewarding. Here is a guide to help you on your journey to your best self.
1. Define what "your best self" means to you
Before you set goals or change habits, pause and reflect.
Ask yourself, “What does being my best self look like?”
Get clear on your values, your passions, and the kind of life you want to lead.
Write it down.
Your vision is your compass.
2. Let go of perfectionism
Perfection isn’t helpful, its energy is too pushing and heavy, the goal is progress. Also, please do not wait until you’re “ready” or everything’s “just right.”
Start now, right where you are. Messy action beats perfect inaction every time. Learn to embrace failure as a teacher, not a flaw. The best version of you isn’t flawless; it’s real, growing, and learning.
3. Prioritize self-awareness
It’s important to know that self-awareness is the foundation of self-growth.
Regularly check in with yourself:
What’s working?
What feels off?
Where are you self-sabotaging?
Journaling, meditation, therapy, or simply quiet reflection can help you be honest with yourself. Growth begins when you’re willing to look inward at your whole self.
Shadow work is one of the deepest ways to gain insight. Shadow work is a process of exploring and integrating the parts of oneself that are often repressed or considered undesirable, including emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. It involves becoming aware of and accepting these "shadow aspects" to achieve greater self-awareness and wholeness.
4. Build habits that support you
Daily habits shape your future. You don’t need a radical overhaul, just small, consistent actions. Choose a few practices that align with your vision:
Allow yourself to sleep more; rest is deeply healing
Eat more nourishing foods, food is medicine
Move your body daily, try yoga, tai chi, somatic therapy, dance, or just go for a walk
Cultivate an attitude of gratitude
Daily small wins build momentum and self-trust.
5. Surround yourself with people who uplift you
You become like the people you spend the most time with. Seek out those who inspire, challenge, and support you.
Set boundaries with relationships that drain you or keep you stuck in old patterns. If necessary, cut off contact.
Energy is contagious, so ensure you protect yours.
Practice setting boundaries:
Physical boundaries: Create physical spaces that are your own, where you can relax and recharge.
Emotional boundaries: Learn to say no to commitments that drain your energy, and protect your time and space.
Mental boundaries: Limit your exposure to negativity by practicing mindfulness and staying away from situations that trigger you.
Manage Your Emotional State: Identify and address triggers. Pay attention to situations, people, or thoughts that make you feel drained, and learn strategies to manage those feelings.
Practice self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, especially when you're feeling overwhelmed or stressed.
Find your happy place: Create a space or engage in activities that make you feel good and bring you joy.
Foster a Positive Environment: Declutter, a cluttered environment can impact your mental and emotional state. Decluttering can create a more peaceful and energetic space.
Practice gratitude: Focusing on the good things in your life can shift your perspective and create a more positive mindset.
Meditation and Mindfulness: These practices can help you become more aware of your thoughts and feelings and learn to manage your energy more effectively.
Breathwork: Deep breathing exercises can help calm your nervous system and release tension.
Physical activity: Exercise can help release stress and boost your energy levels.
Healthy lifestyle: Eating a balanced diet and getting enough sleep are essential for maintaining your overall energy and well-being.
Trust your intuition: Pay attention to your gut feelings and trust your inner wisdom.
Visualise protection: Imagine a shield or bubble of white light surrounding you to help block negative energy.
Cleanse your space: Use practices like smudging or burning incense to clear out stagnant energy.
6. Speak kindly to yourself and others
Your inner dialogue matters. Talk to yourself in a loving way. Replace self-criticism with compassion. Instead of saying, “I’m not good enough,” try: “I am more than enough.”
What you believe about yourself becomes your reality. When you change your beliefs, you change your behaviour. It is worth seeing someone like me who specialises in helping people find out their unhelpful core beliefs and reprogram them.
Notice how you speak to others and how they speak to you.
Practice speaking from your heart, with words that are loving and kind, rather than from your head and a place of judgement. Let go of using words that punish, be mindful if you are being passive-aggressive or gaslighting yourself or others. People will notice if you start speaking to them kindly and are more likely to speak kindly back to you. Do not allow others to speak unkindly to you.
It takes practice to speak from your heart.
Doing loving kindness meditations can help:
The Ho'oponopono prayer, a Hawaiian practice of reconciliation and forgiveness, centers around the mantra: "I'm sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you, I love you". It's a way to take responsibility for your life, seek resolution through love and gratitude, and heal relationships.
The core of the Buddhist prayer of loving-kindness, or Metta, focuses on wishing well for all beings, including oneself. It's a practice of cultivating compassion and positive emotions. "May all beings be happy, healthy, and at peace,"
7. Stay open and curious
Life is unpredictable. Stay curious. Try new things. Take risks. Stay open to change, even when it’s uncomfortable. Growth often lives outside your comfort zone.
Ask yourself often: What else is possible for me?
8. Rest, reset, and reconnect
Being your best self doesn’t mean hustling 24/7. Rest is vital. Time off isn’t a weakness—it’s a way to recharge, reflect, and reconnect with your purpose. Burnout doesn’t serve anyone. Give yourself permission to pause and reflect.
I wrote a fun song about it called Paws and Reflect, listen on YouTube
9. Give back
Helping others connects you to something bigger. Whether it’s through time, kindness, or sharing your gifts, service brings fulfillment. Giving back offers numerous benefits, impacting both the giver and the community. It can increase happiness, reduce stress, improve mental and physical health, and foster a sense of purpose and belonging.
When you help others rise, you rise too.
10. Celebrate
Take time to acknowledge how far you’ve come. Celebrate your wins, no matter how small. Becoming your best self is a lifelong journey. Honor the effort. You deserve to feel proud of the person you’re becoming. Also, celebrate other people in your life, build a culture of encouragement and celebration with your friends and family.
Final thoughts
Becoming your best self isn’t about changing who you are; it’s about coming home to who you’ve always been, underneath the fear, doubt, and conditioning. It’s about becoming more you. One choice, one habit, one courageous step at a time.
You don’t have to do it perfectly. You just have to keep showing up.
Most importantly, have fun!
Read more from Gayatri Lindsey Robertson
Gayatri Lindsey Robertson, Wellbeing Teacher and Coach
Gayatri combines all of her experience into a unique offering as a Wellbeing Teacher and Medicine woman.
