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A Practical Guide To Rebuilding Your Life After A Breakup Or Divorce

Written by: Karen Tomasi, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.

Executive Contributor Karen Tomasi

Embarking on the path of life after a breakup or divorce can feel like navigating a minefield of uncertainties. If you struggle with loneliness, brave the stillness and emptiness of the night, or face the daunting prospect of an unclear future, rest assured—you are not alone.

Divorce agreement and wedding rings

This article aims to be your compass through the complexities of post-breakup life, acknowledging the fears and offering practical steps to navigate this transformative journey.


Fear can be lingering. Recovering is not a linear journey; it's like navigating the dark without a guide. The reality is that this journey is messy. No one handed you a manual on navigating life after a breakup. The truth is that many have faced this kind of fear and emerged on the other side, creating a life far better than they could ever have imagined.


Let's clarify something important: fear doesn't equate to weakness; it simply means you're human!


Rebuilding your life isn't about pretending everything's okay. It's about acknowledging the fear, saying, "Yep, it's there," and still taking small steps forward, no matter what.


Navigating the unknown takes courage. As you take each small step forward, be proud of yourself. Facing your fear will open up new possibilities for you, enabling you to move forward and create a genuinely happy life.


Below you'll find practical steps to help you navigate your breakup


1. Let yourself grieve


You will feel a myriad of emotions. Acknowledge and accept your feelings, such as anger, guilt, shame, sadness, frustration, fear, confusion, etc. Grieving the end of your relationship means giving yourself the self-love, time, and space that you need.


2. Reflect on the relationship


Take an honest look back at the Relationship. Understand both the positive and negative aspects. What lessons have you learned? Identify areas for personal growth.


3. Establish boundaries


Set clear boundaries with your ex-partner. To allow your healing process to begin, limit any contact, especially at the beginning.

4. Focus on self-care


Prioritize self-care. Find activities that make you feel happy and help you relax. Ensure plenty of exercise, good nutrition and quality sleep.


5. Build a support team 


Create a support team with friends, family, a lawyer, a sports buddy and a coach who will be a positive influence and able to provide the emotional support you need.


6. Set realistic expectations


It takes time to heal. It is a gradual process. It is crucial to be gentle and patient with yourself.


7. Rediscover your identity


Reconnect with hobbies and interests. Or, equally, find new ones that bring you fulfilment. Focus on personal goals and aspirations you may have neglected during the Relationship.


8. Embrace uncertainty


Accept that the future is unknown, and that's okay. Reframe the Uncertainty as an opportunity to allow you to grow personally. Create a mindset that views the novel as a space for new possibilities.


9. Journaling


Express your thoughts and emotions by journaling. Writing helps to process emotions and is therapeutic.


10. Stay positive


Cultivate a positive mindset. Focus on what you can control by living in the present moment. Become aware of any negative thoughts and replace them with positive affirmations.


11. Set new goals


Establish new personal and professional goals. Channel your energy into activities that contribute to your overall well-being and growth.


In conclusion, embarking on life after a breakup is undeniably challenging. Everyone's journey is unique, and honouring your own process is essential.


As you move forward, allow yourself to grieve, reflect on the past, establish boundaries, focus on self-care, build a support system, and set realistic expectations. Rediscover your identity, embrace uncertainty, and journal your thoughts. Cultivate positivity, challenge negative thoughts, and set new personal and professional growth goals.


Allow yourself to learn from the experience and open up to new possibilities.


Healing is a gradual and transformative journey where you recover and


rediscover the genuine, authentic you.


If you would like holistic guidance, support and a safe and loving space on your transformative journey, contact me at (and for further info click here or visit my website, also here.


Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, and visit my website for more info!

Karen Tomasi Brainz Magazine

Karen Tomasi, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Karen Tomasi is an accredited holistic Breakup & Divorce Coach & Intuitive Healer focusing on Self-Empowerment. Having experienced a painful divorce followed by a Spiritual Awakening during the Covid-19 Global Pandemic, she has embarked on a personal journey of transformation more than once. Her signature transformation programme, "Breakup to Breakthrough," is designed to guide and support individuals on their transformative journeys before, during or after divorce or breakup.



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